The Remote Island : Fringe

"Mad Men" Is Back In Production, With This Guy

Jake Kalish — Tue, 05 May 2009 18:22:00 GMT

Mad Men began production Monday, with new eps set to air in August and yet another top-notch thespian in the fold. Sterling Cooper, meet your new financial officer, Lane Pryce, otherwise known as Jared Harris, character actor extroardinaire. You might recognize him from The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button, or his recurring role as David Robert Jones in Fringe. Or maybe from B.Monkey with Asia Argento. No? Okay, just us.

One thing - Jared Harris is British. Will Lane Pryce be American? Can a British person convincingly play an American in a televised drama?

Oh. Gosh, really? Never mind.

PREVIOUSLY:

The Winner For Best TV Show In The World Is...

Advertising's CLIO Awards Honor "Mad Men"

Is A "Mad Men" Video Game Coming?

"Fringe" Gives Us More Blood, Guts, And Insight On ZFT

Chenda Ngak — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 20:00:00 GMT

We're counting down to the final three episodes of Fringe's first season and we're sort of bummed that one of the final episodes would skimp so much on the conspiracy arc, but whatevs, we've got two more episodes left and we can't wait. Executive producer Roberto Orci is teasing us with promises of an explosive finale.

"We were saving so many juicy secrets for years and years, and we're actually going to stick a bunch of them in the finale. That may be the worst idea ever, but we're doing it." (eonline.com)

Let's get started then...

The opening crime is a man who seems like a playboy. He meets a woman at a club and brings her home with him. She breaks his neck, leaving behind a pile of exposed, back bones. Ok, we're feel the tinglings of a life lesson here and we're not liking it.

Upon investigating the crime scene, Walter suggests that someone bit open and chewed on the man's spine. Vampires are ruled out as the bite marks are human. They notice that the killer sucked out the man's spinal chord and was exposed to an extinct strain of syphilis. The suspect is a research scientist -- Dr. Nicholas Boone. We find out that the Boone also ordered RUD390. No, it's not R2D2's STD-prone cousin. It's a "chemical compound used in the construction of bio weapons." The same compound was found in the skin growing episode. Immediately, Olivia suspects ZFT.

When caught, Dr. Nicholas Boone was cutting open a dog's spine. He says "someone" was dosed and says he'll answer the questions, but he needs the FBI's help to get his abducted wife back. They head out to a Chinese restaurant to make a bust. Valerie Boone is not there, but over the phone he reveals the location of the venom that has infected his wife. He claims that she was infected as his punishment for leaving ZFT.

After picking put another guy at a club, we get an awesome shot of Valerie's pirahana-like teeth. Again, we're not so sure we like this PSA against promiscuous sex. We come to find out that she needs to feed on spinal fluid of her victims. Dr. Boone throws us a bone and reveals that ZFT wanted to create a human nightmare to show off to other scientists.

Dr. Boone joins forces with Walter to create a cure and hints of a grander plan when reveals that he knows who Walter is, which brings back memories of Walter's role in writing the ZFT manifesto. They have a discussion that brings up William Bell, founder of Massive Dynamics. Astrid figures out where Valerie is picking up her victims because of the matching entry stamps.

Walter extracts spinal fluid from Dr. Boone to create a cure. Meanwhile, the agents capture Valerie and voila! She is cured, but her husband dies. Oh, the predictable irony!

In a final thank you gesture, Dr. Boone leaves Olivia a video tape of answers to questions about ZFT. He gives her names of members. According to Nicolas, the man who is funding ZFT is William Bell -- the founder of Massive Dynamics. We're not as surprised as we wanted to be. Perhaps it's because this season has had so many breaks that it's difficult to remember the difference between ZFT and Massive Dynamics. Who are we kidding? Ultimately we're dying to see where this story is going. With two more episodes to go, at the very least we can look forward to Leonard Nimoy.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Fringe": Can The Crackling Tension And Girl-on-Girl Action Last? Please?

"Fringe" Returns: Mini-Observer Is Creepy, Helpful, Unilluminating (As Expected)

"Fringe": New Episodes Start Tonight, Expect Weird Stuff (Duh)

Hey, Is "Fringe" Finally Going Somewhere?

"Fringe": Fox Releases Painful "Best Of The Observer" Viral Video

"Fringe": Can The Crackling Tension And Girl-on-Girl Action Last? Please?

Bryan Christian — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 14:28:00 GMT

Could it be that Hollywood hack Akiva Goldsman is responsible for one of the best episodes of Fringe so far? Maybe so. The secret: get somewhere with the backstory, mix in a bunch of references to Japanese splatter movies, toss in a light sauce of lady/stripper sex, and voila!

Click through for a few notes -- and a pic of what happens a few frames after the one above!

OK, well, Remote Chenda is off Coachellaing so we're not going to be getting into this episode as deeply as she might, but we'll just say, to our unending surprise: we hope Akiva Goldsman sticks around, because last night's episode balanced menace, comedy, and mytharc just about perfectly. Normally any episode with Olivia piggybacking a dude's mind while he had sex with a stripper would be enough for us, obvs, but there's so much more to like than that: the opening scene was nicely creepy, not to mention a little sad; we actually managed to learn a teeny bit more about Olivia's childhood and her apparent connection with the ZFT; THEY BROUGHT BACK THE ZFT, which we were not sure they would get back to... all that AND we finally got a lissen of Leonard Nimoy as William Bell. And don't get us started on Walter's reaction to someone jumping off a building when Olivia was supposed to be saving them: "I hope Olivia meant to do that," right after BOOM, this poor bystander lands on the top of a car, Die Hard-style. That is some black, black humor, Fringe! We like!

Hey, while we're thinking about the ZFT: we're beginning to think that this whole ZFT/The Pattern thing is basically going to play out like The Dharma Initiative/The Others. As in: we thought at first that they were the same thing, but now actually it seems that they're revealing themselves to be the two forces at war with each other. Did everyone else already get this? Are we just slow on the uptake? Whatevs. We're too happy about this week's ep to even care.

Heck, we don't even mind that fully 2/3rds of the death scenes were kind of ripped off of the classic J-splatter flick Suicide Club:

Any chance we'll get a Battle Royale-themed ep next? Or, um, do they just call that "Lost"?

The "Fringe" Code You Didn't Know Existed Has Been Cracked

Chenda Ngak — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 21:35:00 GMT

Ever wonder what those little symbols on the show Fringe means? If you're familiar with J.J. Abrams, you should know that the guy loves mysteries. Lost has been weaving easter eggs and puzzles into the show for years. A Fringe fan at Ars Techinca has recently cracked the code. Will it give us insight into The Pattern?

Ars Techinca's Julian Sanchez explained how he assigned each of the cryptic images to a letter in the alphabet. Although, his translation excludes the letters F, J, M, Q, W, X, Y or Z, he's been successful in spelling out words that are associated with the shoe. Ars Techinca reported that some of the words were "Observer," "Child," "Bishop," and "Olivia." Okay, BFD, but it's still sort of cool for those of us who are geeky enough to care.

So how did he do it?

On his personal blog, Sanchez writes that the actual solution ended up taking just a few minutes. "[I]t’s actually incredibly simple once you make one crucial assumption," Sanchez stated. That assumption was that the images from each show built up to that single word. "Alas, there’s no deep dark mysteries about the show’s arc concealed here," he added. "And the solution’s actually a bit anticlimactic..."

What Sanchez worked out was a simple monoalphabetic substitution cipher. Each picture shown was a combination of three things: one of eight images (including a butterfly, a seahorse, an apple, and so forth), its orientation (sometimes the image got flipped as if shown in a mirror) and the position of a small glowing yellow dot. Together these items defined one unique letter of the alphabet. Sanchez told Ars that the systematic organization of the reflections and dot positions simplified matters. "Once that's done, it solves itself when you get the wordbreaks right."

To aid amateur decoders who plan to watch the show's return to the air tonight, fan site FringeTelevision created a convenient key based on Sanchez's solution, included below.

(arstechnica.com)

This is the full list of solutions found on Sanchez's blog.

1: OBSERVER
2: CHILD
3: AEGER [Latin for "sick"]
4: ROGUE
5: SURGG [should be SURGE?]
6: CELLS
7: CODES
8: TAKEN
9: VOICE
10: TRADE
11: SAVED
12: BISHOP
13: AVIAN
14: OLIVIA

(juliansanchez.com)

PREVIOUSLY:

"Fringe" Returns: Mini-Observer Is Creepy, Helpful, Unilluminating (As Expected)

"Fringe": New Episodes Start Tonight, Expect Weird Stuff (Duh)

"Fringe" Moves To Canada; Blame New York

Hey, Is "Fringe" Finally Going Somewhere?

"Fringe": Fox Releases Painful "Best Of The Observer" Viral Video

"Fringe" Returns: Mini-Observer Is Creepy, Helpful, Unilluminating (As Expected)

Chenda Ngak — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 19:37:00 GMT

Fringe returned last night and left us wondering what direction the show is headed. We've grumbled in the past that the overarching story line (or "mytharc" for you fellow nerds) moved slower than a buffet line at an old folks home. Don't get us wrong, it was still a good enough episode -- the mini-Observer filled our week's creepy quotient, Walter delivered classic one-liners, and there was a decent amount of blood. But still, we wonder...

A group of construction workers find a feral child in a room that has been hidden away for decades. The child doesn't talk, but can hear, and they suspect he survived on rats. Olivia, Peter, and Walter is called in to see the child. He says they need to deprive the child of oxygen. Whaaat?

Meanwhile back at the office an invitation comes through from a criminal called "The Artist," who is clearly a recurring case that has yet to be solved.

Olivia tries to make friends with the child. He observes her writing down Coolidge Park. Then he he grabs her hands and writes a name: Sam Gilmore. We find out that The Artist's latest victim is Sam Gilmore. So this child is a psychic? Not quite. They suspect that he is hyper-sensitive.

In a scene that annoyed us because of the cliche factor, a woman helps a man in a wheel chair loading things into a van... uhh. Nobody in this world learned anything from Unsolved Mysteries? Or gets creeped out everytime they hear "American Girl"? No, so of course, please everyone, meet the latest victim of The Artist.

Back at the hospital, Olivia tries to win the child over with candy. Social services agent Mr. Michaels makes a visit and talks to Olivia about the child's future. The boy's heart rate spike we see that Olivia is distressed. As the social services man walks away we see him say "I'm at the hospital. I think we've found another one." Okay, this is our only hint at The Pattern, so far.

Later the boy gives another hint and writes down "547 Marlborough". That is where The Artist's van is parked. Where he is smothering his latest victim. With nowhere else to turn, Olivia pays Walter and Peter a visit. Olivia wants to know how to reach the boy. His electromagnetic field picks up things and a bunch of other sci-fi garble.

Sadly, our favorite moment of the show was not related to the story line. Rather, it was a moment when Walter's penis on the brink of falling out of his robe, to Peter's dismay. Walter responds casually with, "I'm sure agent Dunham knows what a penis looks like."

Back at the hospital the ferel child makes an arrow out of candy. Olivia checks him out of the hospital so that Walter can mess around with him. He wants to use a neuro-stimulator to listen to the child's thought. Mr. Michaels is panicking because the child is missing. Walter does a sensual dance with the Nero-stimulator to put the child as ease. The child is tense because he sense Mr. Michaels has entered the building. We come to find out that he's CIA and with higher clearance than Olivia. They request the boy for one more day to help out with the artist case. The boy senses that something is not right with Mr. Michaels.

Oliva and Peter get a lead that the latest victim had cow's blood under her fingers. Peter tips off that it could be a meat packing facility. The neuro-stimulator works. The child starts to freak out and his body temperature drops. Cut to Olivia in a freezer. OMFG. He feels what she feels. Nice. Olivia finds out that a man came in and bought some plastic from a slaughter house. Walter makes the connection that he's emotionally bonded to Olivia. He's trying to help her because he knows that the information is important to her. Now he doesn't want to help her in the case because he doesn't want to go with Mr. Michaels. She makes a breakthrough.

They go down to the corner of York and Glenway. During their traffic stops The Artist's van pulls up. The little yellow arrow was a recreation of The Artist's air freshner!! Olivia makes a move and the Artist takes off. After they shoot out the tires, The Artist takes off, but Olivia finds him and stabs him to death. Oh, that was over fast.

As Mini-Observer is driven to his new home, we see The Observer standing by the side of the road. And this is a surprise how? You know what a surprise would be... his turning up on American Idol. Oh wait.

For a return episode, we were hoping for more insight into The Pattern, Massive Dynamics, William Bell (oh btw, THIS!!!), or Olivia's role in it all. This episode was a stand-alone that could've been plucked from any part of the season and could be dropped into any future season. Which has historically been the problem with Fringe -- too afraid to commit to the overarching mythology for fear of losing viewers. Or maybe J.J. Abrams is still confused by one of his own shows? Well, Abrams, et al: you guys did well last night with the viewers. So don't sweat it. Live a little next time and tell us something we don't know.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Fringe": New Episodes Start Tonight, Expect Weird Stuff (Duh)

"Fringe" Moves To Canada; Blame New York

Hey, Is "Fringe" Finally Going Somewhere?

"Fringe": Fox Releases Painful "Best Of The Observer" Viral Video

"Fringe": New Episodes Start Tonight, Expect Weird Stuff (Duh)

Bryan Christian — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 20:21:00 GMT

What kind of weird stuff you might ask? Well, how about what's being called a "mini Observer". We know, we know. Doesn't sound so great. But don't write horseshit@fox.com just yet.

E! is reporting that Olivia will start to have visions and stuff. OK, fine, whatevs. That's not too lame after all that time spent in the tank and all the things we've learned about her. It's a little disappointing, considering how unless your name is Dale Cooper or Tony Soprano or whatever they call Patricia Arquette on Medium, dream sequences are basically the last resort of the poorly planned story editor, but whatevs. We can live with that one.

Now about this mini Observer?

TVGuide.com: Recently we've seen a softer side of Olivia — in her scenes with children. Is it difficult, as the old saying goes, to work with kids?
Anna Torv: Particularly with Spencer [List, who plays the "mini-Observer"], he was just a dream to work with. I hate it when people talk down to children, and I just loved him actually. I think we got on really well, and it shows in that episode.

OK, well, hear that? Apparently Liv is gonna make out with an underage weirdo or something. Huzzah! No, seriously, this seems like what they call in the biz a bad idea, since from where we're standing, The Observers could spend years being an unknown and we'd be satisfied if, for example, we learned whether Peter was one of his father's experiments. Leave the weirdest mytharc stuff for later, people! But we admire them for taking the bull by the tiny horns and pre-empting everyone by actually calling it a "mini" anything. Cojones, gentlemen.

Oh, and William Bell will finally make an appearance. Thank God. In our hearts, we wish he'd played by Charles Nelson Reilly. Alas.

Our biggest concern about this last batch of episodes is that the April 21 episode, called "Bad Dreams," was directed by Akiva Goldsman, a guy who basically won an Oscar for that one scene in A Beautiful Mind after spending his life as a massive hack. As in: he was the guy who typed out "Bat Nipples" in the previous version of the Batman franchise. But hey, if JJ Abrams can be a good influence on the guys who pieced together Transformers, who knows what could happen.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Fringe" Moves To Canada; Blame New York

Hey, Is "Fringe" Finally Going Somewhere?

"Fringe": Fox Releases Painful "Best Of The Observer" Viral Video

"Fringe" Moves To Canada; Blame New York

Lindy Parker — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:20:00 GMT

Turns out Fringe is the first of what we assume will be many casualties of the recent drying up of tax credits for television production in NYC...

Warner Brothers released the following statement to explain their recent decision:

"In this challenging and uncertain economic environment, we have made the very difficult decision to move the production of ‘Fringe’ from New York to Canada in the event the series is renewed for a second season." (Live Feed)

Now that Fringe is packing up and heading for Canada, we assume we'll be seeing a lot more running around in the woods a la The X-Files. Also, if they're going to all this trouble, taking the show on the road, is it safe to assume that Fringe is getting picked up for a second season? We think yes.

Previously:

No More TV in NYC? What's a Gossip Girl To Do?

Hey, Is Fringe Finally Going Somewhere?

Fringe Star Anna Torv Makes Cheating Look Good In Mistresses

"Remote Free TV" Doesn't Really Work

Jake Kalish — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 18:30:00 GMT

Fox has been experimenting with what it calls "Remote Free TV" on Fringe - about 50% fewer commercials than you'd get on your average hourlong show. On Friday, the network extended "Remote Free TV" to the premiere of Dollhouse. And while this is all keeping people from switching channels, it's costing Fox money.

The network's trying to make up for lost ad revenue by charging more for the spots it does have, and are kinda sorta almost getting away with it, because everyone remembers the first commercial after a show breaks, and the last one. Since Fox is mostly limiting their breaks to 60 seconds, ads are almost all first and last spots. So they're not losing as much dough as you'd think. But they are losing dough. As far as making people not switch the channel, that's not going quite as well as Fox execs had hoped. While viewer retention is better than with programs that have longer commercial breaks, it's not way better. Apparently, 60 seconds is plenty of time to click.

PREVIOUSLY:

Commercials Make TV Shows More Enjoyable?

Hey, Is "Fringe" Finally Going Somewhere?

Bryan Christian — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 18:36:00 GMT

We've not remarked much upon the latest episodes of Fringe. Although we've kept watching and enjoying, there wasn't really much to report in the last few weeks, other than the producers seem intent on hiring everyone who has ever worked with David Simon. We weren't learning anything new about Massive Dynamic or The Pattern, there's been no smoochie-boochie between Olivia and Peter, no substantive revelations about Dr. Bishop... frankly, we were kind of starting to wonder if anything really mattered on this show.

Sure, it's been compelling, creepy stuff at times, but correct us if we're wrong, but when nearly every episode supposedly deals with the overarching conspiracy, you'd really expect a show to start actually, you know, revealing something now and then. Right? Heck, if every episode of The X-Files or Lost had been about Mulder's sister or the Dharma Initiative, they'd have found Samantha by the end of the first season and Jack Shephard would have been home to see the Red Sox win the World Series. But Fringe? No. All that running in place -- however thrilling and littered with trips to the tank -- was starting to bug us.

And then, blammo -- last night we got a couple of really juicy reveals... just in time for Fringe to go away until April?

Reveal Number One: Olivia Is Part Of The Conspiracy
Unbeknownst to her, Olivia was treated with an experimental Massive Dynamic drug as a child, and as a result, Mr. Jones believes her to be capable of some amazing feats, one of which appears to be a kind of telekinesis which he forces her to use to disarm a bomb.

This one should bug us -- we hate that whole messianic "chosen one" horseshit, and this certainly gives us every indication that she show will head in that direction. And yet, we sort of don't care, because it gives Anna Torv reason to break out that quiet little squint (it's one of her cutest looks!) and, more importantly, we were wondering when she was going to actually become interesting. Getting an abusive dad and a sister and a niece wasn't gonna cut it; a creepy past just might.

Reveal Number Two: So Is Dr. Bishop, Probably
Turns out that the multinational group of science buffs that's bringing down all those planes and menacing the world with weird viruses was formed around the principles of an apocalyptic anti-technology manifesto -- which may have been written on Dr. Bishop's old typewriter

This we love. After months of having Walter magically know exactly what's going on pretty much all the time -- "Oh, yes, this reminds me of an experiment I once did..." -- know we have a convenient and compelling reason why: he's actually Tyler Durden. Wait, sorry, our bad; he's the inspiration for all these bad guys. "Oh, yes, this reminds me of a cult of techno-Luddites I once accidentally founded..." Sure, we'll buy that. He's crazy, after all, and John Noble sells even the worst line of dialogue like his family's in hock. What fun to have Walter's forgetfulness actually play into the main story rather than off it. Now, if only we can get the guy to finish his thoughts every time he only partially explains what the heck is going on...

TV Ratings: "Hell's Kitchen" On Fire

Jake Kalish — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 16:25:00 GMT

11.1 million of you watched Hell's Kitchen on Thursday (airing right after that 2 cities for 1 American Idol), huge numbers that bested what Fringe and Lie To Me had done after Idol. A couple of caveats: Firstly, this Hell's Kitchen was a season premiere, and had been promoted up the wazoo. Second, (and probably most importantly) Grey's Anatomy was a repeat, so the competition wasn't exactly its fiercest. Still, these are big numbers for Ramsay and his victims. Um, chefs.

PREVIOUSLY:

Gordon Ramsay Shows His Softer Side

"Hell's Kitchen" Season Premiere Tonight At 9 On Fox

Mario Batali vs. Gordon Ramsay

"Fringe": Fox Releases Painful "Best Of The Observer" Viral Video

Bryan Christian — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 22:40:00 GMT

We been waiting for an obsessive fan to compile a listing of the many appearances of "The Observer" during the first season of Fringe, like the one above which -- we're not afraid to admit -- we totally missed he first time around. But no, Fox beat 'em to it.

Which is too bad, because while seeing this freaky bald dude turn up in the background of episodes you've already seen is pretty awesome (even if it's obviously not always Broadway star Michael Cerveris), the repeated narration by Lance Reddick drove us mad as... Well, mad as Walter Noble might be exaggerating it a bit. But it's close. Click through to see what we mean.

[via io9]

PREVIOUSLY:
Our Fringe Archive

"Fringe": Did You Think There Would Be This Much "Re-Animator" Vibe On This Show?

Bryan Christian — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 22:35:00 GMT

Oh Fringe. We had entertained the possibility that you might not delight us after a couple weeks apart. But no, we still get a kick out of the brazen theatricality of your gore and the dextrous way that John Noble deals with Walter Bishop's mad scientist / Monk tendencies. You're like House if it was produced by Troma Studios, and we're still sold!

Now, we stand behind our previous thoughts on the matter: Anna Torv does too much, and Joshua Jackson does too little. And now we have proof: dig that scene last night where Peter unloaded on Broyles about having to take care of his dad. Did he same out-serioused by Lance Reddick, who could probably stare down Mt. Rushmore if he wanted to? NO. No, he did not. Peter and Broyles are too totally different types of people, but these weird circumstances have brought them together -- and last night we saw the first hints of the kind of actual working relationship they could have. One frenzied, the other rock solid, one half-criminal, the other by-the-book, but both a little world weary and skeptical by nature -- and slowly becoming believers in some weird, weird stuff. Now that's a show!

Also, let's be honest, it's been a long time since we've liked a "guy in pain" scene like we liked Peter being electrocuted in order to read the brain of a dead guy. (Oh, right, the plot: Godfather, parasite; Olivia, German prisoner; Peter, dead guy brain reader. Moving on.) Sure, Jack Bauer's been given the Mr. Joshua treatment a few bilion times, but how often did he get a chaser of blissful opiates at the end as a reward? That was awesome! More drugs, Fringe, and more weird violations of the dead, and we will probably stay with you to the bitter, bloody end.

PREVIOUSLY:
"Fringe" Does The One Thing Guaranteed To Make Us Furious

The Weekly Rewind: Seriously, Is This Election Over Yet?

Ben Kallen — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 21:30:00 GMT

Nope, not yet! TV's still all about politics -- and, on the other hand, distracting ourselves from politics -- as we'll find out when we recall the highlights of the week.

We watched hot Sarah Palin on SNL, and she was funnier than the average guest host. Coming soon: Ellen Show dancer Barack Obama. Too bad one of these two will be elected soon -- we smell comedy team! (Don't forget to add this guy.)

Opie Cunningham came back through time from 30-plus years ago! (To, um, tell us how to vote today.)

We watched the season premiere of 30 Rock -- before it aired on TV! The Internet is cool.

We heard that someone still doesn't like the looks of Dancing With the Stars' Cheryl Burke. Someone crazy.

...Or else maybe Dancing is cursed.

We set Lance Bass against Joey Fatone, and Dwight against Gareth. Remember, no talking about Fight Club!

We heard that Lindsay Lohan's having problems -- and this time, it's personal.

We saw the new CSI tech naked, which probably means she'll be murdered off soon.

We heard that William Shatner got into a spat with George Takei. Did you know they used to work together?

Just like Desmond, we predicted what's going to happen next on Lost.

We saw a preview of 50 Cent's new show, and it was kind of like business school. Heck, the guy's name is money.

We got mad at Fringe for being too much like other shows, but then realized that without other shows, it wouldn't be about anything.

What the hell, AMC? You say you're bringing back Mad Men, but neither the creator nor the actors have contracts yet? Is that any way to treat the best show on TV?

We wondered why anyone would want to dress like this lady anyway.

More Dexter, yay! More Knight Rider -- huh?

We saw Se cond Becky give a loud kiss-off to Ted on How I Met Your Mother. We love ya, sister, but please do not get back with J.D. on Scrubs.

And we noticed that House and Gray's Anatomy have figured out what we really want in a medical series: girl-on-girl action.

But not this kind.

Previously:
The Weekly Rewind: Everyone's a Comedian

Did Lindsay Lohan Get Kicked Off "Ugly Betty" for Lack of Underwear?

Ben Kallen — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 18:20:00 GMT

Oh, c'mon, you knew we'd be writing that headline eventually.

Actually, all that happened was that Lindsay's stint on Ugly Betty was shortened from six episodes to four. But if the show was willing to toss out such a big-name guest star, there must have been a good reason. Unfortunately, so one seems to agree on what that reason was.

Per Page Six, here are the charges against LiLo, and the responses from one of her "people" -- plus a preview clip from tonight's episode, so you can decide for yourself.

Charge: One episode, titled "Granny Pants," was about how Lohan, playing Betty's high school nemesis, would "de-pants" [America] Ferrera. But Ferrera exacts her revenge and pulls down Lohan's pants instead. "Lindsay wasn't wearing any underwear," the source said.

Response: A Lohan pal fumed, "Bull [bleep]! Lindsay wears underwear all the time now. She was wearing a G-string. And it was America's fault. They were rehearsing the scene and America wasn't supposed to pull Lindsay's pants down -- but she did. Lindsay was so embarrassed, she started crying."

We say: Um, Lindsay wears underwear all the time now? And on a day when they were rehearsing a pants-down scene, she decided to sport a G-string? As much as we love LiLo, it doesn't sound as if embarrassment is an emotion with which she's overly familiar.

Charge: One production source said... "Lindsay would show up every day with an entourage of people. She smoked 24/7, and after she left, they had to repaint her dressing room it was such a mess."

Response: As for the dressing room, Lohan's pal said it was also used by the cast of the Fox sci-fi thriller Fringe. "So maybe they messed it up. And an entourage? Yeah, she had her sober companion with her, as well as her manager, assistant and [girlfriend] Samantha Ronson. Her publicist was there a couple of times. But so what?"

We say: Hey, Ugly Betty, you guys hired Lindsay Lohan to be on your show. This sounds like awfully minor-league stuff, and if you'd read any of the 70 million tabloid articles about her, you should have expected much worse. Besides, those nerds from Fringe probably do walk around with special-effects goo on their fingers all day.

Charge: Lohan "would obsessively cut pictures of herself out of the tabloids like she was creating some sort of scrapbook and refused to go on set until America was there -- it was a power play."

Response: The pal blames Ferrera for any issues, saying, "America was mean to Lindsay. Producers give her too much power. Lindsay didn't do the last two episodes because America didn't like her and got her kicked off."

Response to the response: Ferrera's rep would only say, "America is grateful to have had her on the show and thinks everyone should tune in to see how great the episodes are."

We say: When two female stars are together, someone will always claim there was a nasty catfight. Is Lindsay kind of a diva, and is America protective of the show that currently represents her entire non-Traveling Pants career? Probably. Who cares?

Still, if Lindsay were smart, she'd hire away America's rep, who seems awesome.

Update: One more possible reason for the dumpola, according to EOnline: The main driving force for this decision is that Lindsay was not gelling creatively with the series. "She was not so interested in creating a character," another reliable insider close to Betty tells me. "She was more interested in just playing herself, and that doesn't work on a show like this with such heightened reality."

We say: Once again -- they hired Lindsay Lohan, the star of I Know Who Killed Me. If you want thespianism, see if Meryl Streep's available.

Below, a scene featuring Lohan's acting ability, or lack thereof, from tonight's episode (directed by Fred Savage!):

Photo: ABC

Previously:
L.A. Police Chief Outs Lindsay Lohan
Ugly Betty Block Party

"Fringe" Does The One Thing Guaranteed To Make Us Furious

Bryan Christian — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 19:30:00 GMT

An OK episode of Fringe last night – microwaves, headbursting – but the concerns that we voiced last week about Agent Dunham being the hardcore center of the show were in full bloom last night, as we were deeply bored by the supposedly deep backstory involving Olivia shooting her stepdad on her birthday. What are we, in Gremlins here?

More importantly, though, the writers gave us a scene so hackneyed, so annoying – and of such grave portent to the rest of the series unfurling in an original, intelligent fashion – that whether we like it or not, Fringe is now officially on our shitlist.

What happened? Click through to find out.

We can’t find a clip of it, but anyone who saw it last night will know immediately what we’re referring to: the monologue where Olivia Dunham a) tried to seem more serious than LANCE GODDAMN REDDICK, and b) went on about how she takes her job personally, and how it makes her a better agent, and how it helps her get in the mind of the people she’s after.

WHAT? WHAAAA?????!@??!?!?E?@?KGS{D” KGDLS

Really? After all this time, we’ve actually just been watching Profiler? With more money? Jesus H. Christ, Fox, you could have saved us the time and the trouble and propped our eyes open with all your fake federal badges while you forced us to watch Lifetime crime movies you clueless jerks.

Fox, Abrams, all: if this is really where you’re going, or even where you think you’re coming from, it’s safe to say you’re close to fucking this one up. Get on with the conspiracy, and get on with giving Joshua Jackson more to do, as he’s the one whose dry, underplayed lead you should be following.

PREVIOUSLY:
"Fringe": How Not To Put The "Power" Into "Power Ballads"
"Fringe": Behold A Strange Canister From The Earth. Also, Our Anna Torv Crush.

Wake Up And Smile: "The Mentalist" Is The Biggest New Show Of The Year. Debate That!

Bryan Christian — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 13:29:00 GMT

Hey, how about some news that doesn't have anything to do with last night's debate... You know, stuff about The Mentalist here, obviously, plus Fringe, Jason Priestley, My Name Is Earl, and a Doctor Who spinoff for kids. No debating here: that's one hell of a line up, right?

-- Yes, it's true: CBS's The Mentalist is garnering more viewers on a weekly basis than any other show this year -- though Fringe has a strong DVR following. Q: Did we screw up not recapping The Mentalist?

-- Speaking of Fringe, someone out there thinks that Lance Reddick may be playing the same character on both Fringe and Lost, we just don't know it yet. Q: Is someone reaching?

-- Jason Priestley returns to TV as Brandon -- but not that Brandon, and not on the new 90210. He's gonna be on My Name Is Earl. Q: Is someone trying to stick it to The CW?

-- There's a Doctor Who spinoff in the UK for kids? With evil clowns? Q: How come our childhood was so lame?

-- Vh1's Best Week Ever will be retooled to have only one host but still be wacky and outRAGEous and stuff. Q: We care why?

"Fringe": How Not To Put The "Power" Into "Power Ballads"

Bryan Christian — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 19:34:00 GMT

OK, another middlingish episode this week from JJ and the boys -- particularly in its supposedly-out-of-place use of a certain 1980's love song, something that's been done dozens of times more effectively elsewhere -- and yet we're not dissuaded. We still think the show's one of the best offerings in this somewhat meager year -- but we are starting to see where we might have problems down the road.

Problem number one: it's turning out to be more Alias than Lost. As in: rather than being a bunch of characters all with separate agendas, whose stories all wind up with somewhat equal weight, the show is grounded a little too firmly around Olivia Dunham. We don't have a problem with Anna Torv, you may remember; we just think that there's something a little too familiar -- not to say potentially annoying -- about a big international conspiracy where one person and one person only seems on track to figure it out. That's a description that sums up both Alias and The X-Files at their most infuriating and messianic, and it'll be a shame if Fringe falls into a similar trap. Particularly when you've got a bunch of really stellar actors playing fairly interesting characters, each of whom could probably handle their ep every few weeks the way that Lost's characters do. Heck, Kirk Acevedo's Charlie has been little more than a plot device in the series so far, but anyone who's seen him on Oz knows that he's got breadth and depth to handle whatever they threw at him.

Problem number two: Not enough Joshua Jackson! We're not saying give the guy the show, or even give the guy a gun, but he's basically a glorified sidekick right now, someone who makes wisecracks and punches people when needed and not much else. Don't get us wrong: if we didn't have guys like that, Harrison Ford would still be a stoned carpenter in Malibu. We're just saying: there's as much there there with Peter as with Olivia, and it's about time we start to see it.

OK, well, we've ranted a little more than we thought. That's weird, because we do like the show a lot, we just had to get this off our chest. Now, here's the thing: we've been devoting way too much space to our recaps of Fringe in the last few weeks, and it must end, so in the interests of brevity, wit, and having a few minutes to eat our lunch today, here's our quick take on last night's Fringe (don't worry, it wasn't a big backstory episode [we don't think]

THE LITTLE PICTURE:
So there's this pathetic delivery guy who gets in an elevator and because he doesn't know he's got the power to make electricity surge around him, his embarrassment and anger over a girl he likes finding out causes him to rev up the elevator's engine and drive it into the ground. The guy walks away from the crash, which killed everyone else -- and which was narrowly missed by the Observer, see above -- and heads back to work. Meanwhile, Olivia and the team are called in to have a look; a similar event happened on a mag-lev train in Japan and it might be The Pattern. (Duh.) Walter calls the whole electrical thing pretty quickly, and back in the lab describes experiments he was a part of that turned people into living electrical beacons that could be followed by carrier pigeons. Also, he plays with a dead person's heart. Meanwhile, the pathetic guy's back at work, and not getting any respect from his boss, whose arm is thereupon gnawed up by a big machine that looks good only for chewing up limbs. Pathetic Power Guy runs back home, where he's harpied upon by his harridan of a mother, who promptly has an electrically induced heart attack. PPG makes a break -- but he's captured by the Pattern doctor that turned him into what he is when he was supposed to be adjusting his brainwaves to make him more self-help successful and stuff. Call the BBB! Thankfully, Charlie at the FBI hears about the work accident, connects that to Pathetic Power Guy, who signed in at the office building, and the chase is on. They find Evil Mom's body, and Walter uses Pathetic Power Guy's tape-style Walkman -- REO Speedwagon's "Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore", btw -- to isolate his signal and train a bunch of other carrier pigeons to find him. Which is good, because he's about to have his brain dug into by the evil Pattern doctor. And from here on out, we sort of get the same chase we've had in the last few episodes -- PPG escapes the Doctor and his henchmen by turning on a car and running someone over, and the Doc gets pinched by the Feds, while Peter whacks PPG with a crowbar and he gets sent off to a hospital.

THE BIG PICTURE:
Not much new with The Pattern this week, other than the new game will clearly be "Find The Observer" when watching this show. And not much to say about the Bishops either, since Peter still seems to be not doing much (possibly as a result of that wicked beating he got last ep) and Walter's still just happening to have worked on everything that The Pattern has been up to. Seriously, did this guy just have the most evil Rolodex in 1974 or should he be working up an Intellectual Properties suit against The Pattern?

No, what's really new this week is that John, Olivia's dead ex-boyfriend, who we're pretty sure we saw in some sort of not-dead state at the end of an episode a few weeks back, may not actually be coming back to visit Olivia in a physical sense. He shows up to help out a few times in this episode, once in Olivia's house (also seen at the end of the last ep), once at the office, and once at the Crazy House at the end of the episode, but according to Walter, this might actually have been vestiges from that whole mindmeld thing that Olivia did to read his brainwaves in the pilot. Yes, this is a little BSGish, and No, John is not nearly as hot as Number Six, so will this plotline bug us? Maybe, but since we did, in fact, see John above ground early on, there's the chance that reanimated John will somehow battle for Olivia's loyalties as well -- a possibility made all the more potent by Olivia discovering an engagement ring in a box of John's belongings that Broyles tells her to look through.

Anderson Cooper Got Better Looking, Huh?

Bryan Christian — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 14:33:00 GMT

He kind of looks like Hitchcock here. Or The Observer. Oh, hey, wait a sec. He does have a knack for being around calamities...

Why Will This Baby Picture Go for $8-12K at Christie's? [Scanner]

Wake Up And Smile: There's TV Besides Sarah Palin, Guys

Bryan Christian — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 13:18:00 GMT

We all need a little perspective now and then, right? So check it out: there's a whole world out there that's got nothing to do with everyone's favorite GILF.

Not that we're declaring a Palin-free zone here. Just, you know, if you're interested in learning about Mary-Louise Parker, Fringe, David Spade, Heather Locklear, Human Giant, Anna Nicole's boobs, how the Dexter set is actually becoming a bloodbath, AMC's AWESOME new plans for a sci-fi show -- and yes, a little more news on SNL and Sarah Palin -- click on through.

-- Let's get the Palin stuff out of the way: the McCain camp's making noise that they'd like to respond to all these Tina Fey sketches, possibly with an appearance by Mrs. Palin herself. Nothing yet from the Wahlberg camp.

-- Mary-Louise Parker hasn't actually made any news. But she and LL Cool J's kids had a public playdate. And it's pretty adorable.

-- Fringe will be around for the whole year, which is maybe the first good news we've heard this fall.

-- David Spade is checking up on Heather Locklear after her DUI, but still, it might be nice if you have her a call or something.

-- Hey look, there's a Human Giant video contest! Cool!

-- Hey look, we won't be seeing Anna Nicole's 1994 boob job tape. Thank Christ.

-- Jimmy Smits stabbed a guy shooting Dexter. Does that count as bad luck or ad-libbing?

-- Awesome news for sci-fi geeks: AMC's working on an adaptation of Kim Stanley Robinson's Red Mars, which if you've never read it, is basically The Martian Chronicles with twice the politics and technology.

"Fringe": Behold A Strange Canister From The Earth. Also, Our Anna Torv Crush.

Bryan Christian — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 16:33:00 GMT

Lots to talk about from last night's episode of Fringe -- wetware, possible aliens, root beer -- but first things first: anyone else struck by how foxy Anna Torv was last night? She doesn't seem like a particularly long or lanky gal, but we found it adorable how her arms and hair kept swishing around, how she'd walk all the way around a chair before sitting in it, and how she'd give weird, meaningful looks over nothing at all. You know how sometimes smart girls really do cut loose one night, have their first shots, do something new and carefree with their hair, and give you that look that says "Now that you're thinking about it, the answer is yes"? It was like that. Anyway, we heart her now.

So, the ep. Well, the opening: in Williamsburg, Brooklyn (our old neighborhood), a hairless weirdo in a suit eats a sandwich, takes notes in a strange language, and keeps tabs on a construction site, which not surprisingly exploded in some sort of calamity. Of course, cranes are always falling down in New York, so maybe he works for the city? Whatever, all we want to say is: the version of Patsy Cline's timeless hit "Crazy" that was playing on the jukebox is from this record, which if you care anything about country music, Willie Nelson, or your very soul, you will buy now.

Back to Fringe, and back in Boston, Walter's starting to drive Peter nuts with his quirks, and we gotta cop: us too. These "wow, the world is new again" gags didn't wear too well on Life either, so our advice is to just get Walter all the root beer we want and move on. Anyways. Peter wants out of this whole babysitting gig, but Olivia gives him a couple saucy head turns and gets him to stick around for one final case. And so, back to Brookly... Oh, no, they took the weird canister -- which is made of a strange metal and resonates at between 2 and 4 megahertz, which means it's faster than our laptop -- back to Boston. Oh, well; guess we're taking the G if we wanna see the old neighborhood. Walter says he knows what this object is, but won't tell until he runs a few tests, and at the behest of Broyles, Olivia goes off to interview an old friend who found something similar in 1987.

Meanwhile, someone with a crazy future gun lifted from an FPS is raiding the warehouse where the object used to be. Olivia's unaware of this, though, so after interviewing her friend -- who basically just acts sad and says "Stay away from that thing" -- notices the hairless weirdo from the opening of the show in a case photo from 1987... and a photo from the hospital in episode two... and, Broyles tells her, he was in Brooklyn, too -- not to mention dozens of other Pattern incidents. They call him "The Observer". We're impressed with this little twist, partly because the pictures of him in various poses are so cool, and partly because we're happy to see Michael Cerveris, who's an excellent Broadway actor, get a little TV gravy. Nice taste, Fringe people!

So, as if things weren't weird enough, that guy with the weird gun -- who we haven't mentioned yet is played by Michael Kelly from Generation Kill and Dawn of the Dead -- is interrogating Olivia's sad friend by shoving wires up his brain and reading his mind. He wears this watch cap on his head, and there's the implication that there are some sort of nodes up in there that he uses to read peoples minds with the nose wires. Are we ever gonna get to see underneath it? (SPOILER: not this episode, but maybe someday.)

Hey, want things ever weirder? How about this: after hearing about the raid on the warehouse, Walter decides its time to send out Peter for aluminum foil, not to sneak the object out of his lab to someplace safe as he claims, but so he has a moment to drug Astrid and give the object to... The Observer! Over root beer, they chat a little, as only weirdos can, and The Observer notes that he can't actually handle the object, leaving Walter to keep the obkect safe on his own.

Lickety-split, Walter gets picked up by the Feds and brought in for questioning. (Yes, that was sort of underwhelming.) Not sure what the Feds asked him, but Peter wants some answers too. Walter reacts to this by angrily insulting the memory of Peter's mother, giving Peter just the push he needed to head back to the Crazy House and start to find a way out of town. He bolts out of the room, giving Walter one of those moments to remember that he's not the center of the universe. Back at the Crazy House, Peter's starting to scrounge up work anywhere he can. Too bad the guy with the hat and the wires and the boom gun is standing right behind him!

Suddenly, Peter's getting wires up his nose too, and the dude in the hat's asking him to think about where the object is. Maybe Criss Angel has one of these machines too? Weirdly, Peter's able to tell him where it is even though he doesn't actually know, and they wind up at his grandfather's grave out in the woods. But Olivia's hot on their heels -- Walter knew, somehow, that Peter would spill brain beans he didn't know he had -- and there's a shootout. Crazy guy with hat gets a couple in the sides from Olivia (but isn't killed), and the object explodes into the ground, while Peter, still bloodied from the interrogation, gets an even weirder mind freak from The Observer, who's turned up, one presumes, to observe. For a few amusingly juvenile moments of weird, Peter and The Observer argue, except The Observer is reading Peter's mind and speaking it back to him as he says it, which doesn't seem to frustrate Peter as much as it would frustrate us. Maybe he's an only child? More questions for later, since The Observer decides this one-sided conversation is over and shoots Peter in the gut with yet another weird gun. Except Peter's not dead -- he's just weirded out enough to stick with the squad a while longer, if only to figure out what the H is going on. And Walter, perhaps sensing that people are starting to get pissed off by his inscrutable weirdness and maybe they need a little something form him, apologizes (unsuccessfully) to Astrid and reveals to Peter that long ago, The Observer saved both of their lives, and that hiding the object was, perhaps, Walter's way of paying back the favor. He also hints that Peter and Walter may be sharing thoughts in some manner, which is really the worst thing to do with your dad, if only so you never find out what your mom looks like naked. But no, he doesn't actually tell us what the object was. Drat.

Oh, and then John shows up. You know John; the turncoat double agent who was killed in the pilot? (He called earlier, btw.)

Nice to not have Nina Sharp show up and do the exact same scene she always does. Also nice that Fringe is going to be keep actors like Cerveris and Kelly around. They're a great presence and, if Cerveris can stand to shave his eyebrows every so often, I'm sure Abrams/Fox checks are nice to have in the bank. Next week, sounds like Peter's jumping whole hog into this whole investigating thing, meaning that he'll be using his new federal credentials and, um, having that meeting with Nina Sharp that Olivia normally has. Ah well, maybe he'll arm wrestle her or something.

PREVIOUSLY
"Fringe": Massive Dynamic Is The New SD6, Yeah Yeah
"Fringe": We're Trying Not To Get Excited About This Show

"Fringe": Massive Dynamic Is The New SD6, Yeah Yeah

Bryan Christian — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 15:32:00 GMT

Fringe got its first clinker last night; not a stinker, necessarily, but there were too many off moments, too many plot illuminations obviously looped in during post ("You'll never believe; she's DEA!"), and the episodic stories were dealt away with a little too neatly for it to ever be called a winner. And yet, it was still pretty fun TV. Between drilling into a guy's brain to read "ghost" radio waves and last night's House, where Omar Epps got a pile of old man intestines in his face, we think Tuesdays might turn out to be the grossest night of the week! Hooray for grody!

This is the first week we'd noticed that Darin Morgan, MVP writer on The X-Files classic third season, is a supervising producer on Fringe, and last night's feel would have had a real Darin Morgan-y vibe if they'd given the guy at the center of this week's episode something to do other than be an accidental receiving antenna for The Pattern's "ghost network." Hmm.... lots to spell out there. Well, Leo (that's the guy's name) is apparently running around Boston picking up conversations and images having something to do with the pattern. At the beginning of the episode, we see him in confession with a priest, describing his pain at seeing something horrible happen on a bus -- right as it's happening across town. (Creepy suit, steals backpack, encases the bus with gas/goop. You know. The usual.)

So, we're not surprised when Olivia and the Crazy House gang start looking into the murders and turn up Leo as a possible suspect. In fact, a search of his house reveals him to have "seen" dozens of Pattern incidents over the last few years, leading Broyles to wonder how he could be involved when he's so clearly not part of the conspiracy. (He's kind of a schlub.) Walter suggests he's psychic and wants to cut into his brain, but when the (compromise) MRI makes Leo's blood nearly burst out of his veins, Walter remembers -- wait for it -- an experiment he did long ago, introducing metals into bloodstreams in order to send and receive signals along a secret "ghost network." Instead of cracking open Leo's head, they crack open his records, and find that he was a test subject in the experiment. Walter hypothesizes that somehow the metals in Leo's blood have multiplied over the years, allowing him to see and hear "ghost network" signals -- which The Pattern appear to be using.

Meanwhile, Olivia's been investigating the victims of the bus incident. Turns out one of them is DEA, and that Massive Dynamic -- those guys, again! -- turns out to own exclusive rights to parts of the gas/goop compound. A visit to Nina Sharp at Massive Dynamic turns up sort of half-useful and fully like we've seen it before; a visit from the DEA turns out to be wholly un-useful, since the dead woman's partner apparently cut something out of her hand when visiting her body. Something Olivia doesn't realize until they hear Leo relating a conversation about it (in Latin, urgh) from the "ghost network" way after the fact. Using Leo as a guide, they trace the DEA agent to his meet with the Creepy Suit from the bus, only to reach him after he's handed over the small amber circle -- no idea what it actually is -- and been shot semi-Bourne style in a train station. The chase is on, and Olivia and Charlie corner the Creepy Guy in traffic, where they get the mystery object from him -- and where he jumps in front of a bus.

The episode ends with Peter, who didn't have very many good lines this week, playing "Someone to Watch Over Me" on a jazz piano in the Crazy House (guess they traded in the cow?) while Broyles hands Sharp the device, whatever it is, and leaves, allowing Sharp to get back to the tedious task of downloading everything they can off the brain of the exhumed body of John Scott, Olivia's turncoat dead FBI bf.

All in all, lots of plot this week, maybe too much, and the character stuff came in a little weak. A nice moment with Peter and Walter in a diner early on was interrupted by a somewhat cliched reference to Peter's shady business past and by too much weirdness from Walter. We get it; he's new to the world. That doesn't mean he can't speak English like everyone else!

All of which is our way of saying: Fringe people, listen to Darin Morgan. Not only is he a pro at getting some nicely creepy and grody moments into a well-structured hour of TV, he's also excellent at playing the main characters of a show off that week's guests. One of the many hallmarks of his work on Files -- we're talking "Jose Chung's From Outer Space," "War of the Coprophages," and "Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose" here -- was his ability to get Mulder and Scully to reveal tiny pieces of themselves through natural, believable dialogue with the weird, wonderful psychics, scientists, writers, and abductees that served the plot that week. Where were Leo's good lines this week? Nowhere, he came and (seemingly cured) went, almost without making an impression. Classic rookie mistake guys; we're into the main plot now, you know? We're comfortable with not knowing whether Massive Dynamic is on the side of good or bad (SD6, anybody?), and we're OK with that mystery extending to Broyles and whoever else comes on the scene. In the meantime, how about following Darin Morgan's lead and getting us some juicy scenes with Olivia, Peter, Walter, and whatever poor saps they come into contact with huh? You might find a little effort in that direction will pay off in others as well.

Also, Darin Morgan plays a mean human-size liver fluke. We're just saying.

PREVIOUSLY:
"Fringe": We're Trying Not To Get Excited About This Show
"Fringe": New "X-Files", New Clooney? Yeah, Maybe So.

Wake Up And Smile: "That's What She Said" Edition

Bryan Christian — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 13:30:00 GMT

-- What is a "Clois"? Why, it's what Smallville fans refer to as the whole "Lois and Clark" dynamic so they don't have to actually say "Lois and Clark." Because no one likes being reminded of Dean Cain. (That's what she said!)

-- HBO renews True Blood for another season after only two episodes, mixed reviews, and middling ratings, while House and Fringe proved to be a solid team Tuesday night, with House delivering 14.4 million viewers -- and Fringe retaining 93% of them. (That's what... huh?)

-- Speaking of House, if you thought it was hot that Jennifer Morrison-and/or-Spencer was up for a threeway with House and Cuddy, often bi-playing hottie Olivia Wilde sounds like she might be open with getting it on with Lisa Edelstein too. (Wait, she said that?)

-- Last weekend's SNL season premiere and and a writers panel yesterday prompts Defamer to ask an interesting question: has Saturday Night Live quit the business of producing biting political satire by trying to remain impartial? Or to put it another way: do they care too much whether Sarah Palin liked their Tina Fey sketch or not? (Cause that is what she said!)

-- Paris Hilton's been giving interviews about her new reality show, claiming that over 300,000 people tried to become her New BFF. Guess when it comes to lies, she likes 'em big and hard to swallow. (Oh, that's too easy.)

"Fringe": We're Trying Not To Get Excited About This Show

Bryan Christian — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 16:32:00 GMT

It's tricky describing how much we are starting to really like Fringe. On the one hand, it's a sleek, well-made conspiracy-laden thrill ride that's not just reminiscent of The X-Files -- but of that show in Season Two, right when it started hitting its stride. On the other hand: they read the back of a dead girl's eyeball last night!

It's a rule of thumb on thriller TV in the post-90's world: if there's a stripper in the first scene of a program, she sure as heck ain't gonna survive the opening credits. And so, when the second episode of Fringe opens in a hotel room, with a creepy guy chatting with -- well, listening to -- a gal in her underwear talking about her name at "the club," we all know how this is gonna end, right? With her suddenly, gorily, and distressingly delivering a full-grown baby in a matter of minutes and dying from the strain. Obvs. (Swear to God, in her final moments, they looped in the sound of fabric ripping. Ack!) Anyway, all those creepy tools that the creepy guy was creepily removing from his creepy bag? Well... we'll get to that in a sec.

Opening credits, followed by a committee with both Agent Broyles and Nina Sharp. Apparently he's briefing her on his progress with The Pattern -- and yet, we thought she was part of The Pattern after last week's gotcha ending... Double cross in the works, or does everyone in this world just bust out with the creepy science when they get a chance? Oh, and a quintillion dollars. Who knows; anyway, Sharp isn't too happy with Broyles putting Olivia on the whole Pattern beat, seeing as how she was indiscrete and illadvisted to start banging her late partner. Broyles takes this in stride, and obviously Sharp doesn't get her removed from the cases, because not moments later, Broyles is calling Olivia up to have her, Peter, and Walter come in on this stripper situation since it's probably based on Walter's previous work. Getting Peter out of bed is the easy part; getting Walter to quit playing with the seat warmer in the car over, that's tricky.

In the hospital, a gruesome scene: not just the stripper but her "baby," which apparently grew to a normal size -- umbilical cord still attached -- before dying of old age against a door in the hallway. Did we say gruesome? We also meant: deeply pitiful and touching in a weird, bloody way. Is Fringe more interested in making us sad than Files ever was? Maybe so. Probably so, since within a few seconds Walter is also having to be reminded that he's got a lab to examine the bodies in, and then pitching a weird, angry fit. Something physical or mental? We're not learning this week...

A call comes in about the hotel room that the whole mess started in, and when they look around, Olivia realizes that she knows something about this case. The sheets on the bed mimic the MO of a serial killer that she and her dead turncoat boyfriend had been investigating and never caught. Whoever this killer is, he'd string up ladies and remove their pituitary gland before killing them. With Charlie's help, she gets her old case files and reacquaints herself with the case... just as Creepy Guy is lining up another victim.

Back in the Crazy House, Walter's milking that cow he got in the pilot when he remembers a car he put in a garage 17 years ago. It's a spooky Silence of the Lambs type deal, right down the hand in a jar, and pretty soon Walter's delicate memory has been jogged enough to point gang to a doctor named Primrose, who when questioned admits to having quit government work because it was too awful not to. And what work did he have? Why, he was figuring out how to breed fullgrown soldiers in a matter of 3 or 4 years. One other thing: his son happens to be the Creepy Guy, whose name is Christopher and is apparently in some sort of pain. Well, aren't we all.

Again to the crazy house, where the gang are trying to figure out how to find out more about the dead girl. And after one epiphany by Walter, one trip to Massive Dynamic by Olivia, and one failed job offer to Olivia from Sharp, they're scanning the back of the dead girls eyeball for the last things she saw. And no kidding, everybody was wearing goggles, lights were flashing... it was giddily old-school. We half expected to see Walter start mistreating a hunchback or something. With the images from the girls eyes, they triangulate her last location to a warehouse, and head out to raid the place.

Which is good, because all this time, Creepy Guy/Chris has been prepping another poor gal for murder/gland extraction. And this time, Dr. Penrose is helping him! From a serum that Penrose hands to Chris, it's clear that these girls have been losing their pituitaries to keep Chris from some awful fate. (Suppose the doing it and ritualized murders were just, like, gravy for the guy.) But Peter and Olivia show up and the jig is up! Chris makes a break, and so does Penrose -- but not before juicing the next victim with a fistful of anaesthesia, leaving Peter to save her. This he does in a somewhat poorly-described manner, involving wires and a phone book being used as a makeshift defibrilator. It's not a big deal, but next time something like this happens, they might want to MacGyver it a little more. They had Walter on the phone and everything; would have been easy enough to just explain it a little more between mouthfuls of snacks.

Anwyay, Olivia's off chasing down Chris, who was apparently way closer to falling apart than we'd realized. So after a brief chase -- sort of like a rerun of the one from the pilot -- he hides a dark corner, aging about a year every second, hear growing white, skin falling, finally dying -- of old age -- explaining that he was never Penrose's "son." He was an experiment.

Back at the Crazy House, Walter and Peter are asked to sign away their rights in order to stay on the case. Peter refuses, but Walter agrees, noting to Olivia that (speaking of security), couldn't she keep the thing about Peter's medical records between the two of them... and Olivia doesn't know what he's talking about. Hmm... Creepy? Foreboding? Perhaps; perhaps not. When Walter goes to sleep that night, being lullabized by his son, does the flash of some Venture Brothers-style cloning equipment we see in the final frames hint at something awful -- or is it Walter, fondly remembering something about his own, prodigiously intelligent son.

All in all, this show is shaping up, wethinks. Joshua Jackson is settling into his role as angry babysitter with aplomb, Anna Torv is maybe a little more intense than we thought she was at first but maybe that gives her somewhere to go, and John Noble as Walter Bishop is answering the age-old question "What if Monk was a mad scientist?" all we're saying is: someday, guys, there's gonna be a Fringe marathon on Sci-Fi. And we are gonna plan on getting drunk the night before, just so we're hungover on the couch all day watching it.

PREVIOUSLY:
"Fringe": New "X-Files", New Clooney? Yeah, Maybe So.
"Fringe" Scores Meh Ratings While "90210" Viewership Drops
Top Ten New Shows: #1 - "Fringe"

The Weekly Rewind: Floating in a Sea of Television

Ben Kallen — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 21:35:00 GMT

The new TV season is here, and so far it's going pretty well. None of the new shows have bowled us over yet, but that's okay, because we still have other things on our minds... such as politics, and stars' naked booties. Let's remember it all fondly with the highlights of the week.

We gawked at the stars on the Video Music Awards, and examined what they were wearing. But we were glad host Russell Brand didn't offer Britney a drink.

We saw far more than we should have of Julianna Margulies and Jessica Simpson. But Pam Anderson? We've seen it all before.

We watched Kanye West get arrested at the airport, apparently for carrying more than an ounce of toothpaste.

We heard that a fellow critic whacked ailing legend Roger Ebert at a movie screening, even though it wasn't Beyond the Valley of the Dolls.

We saw Gossip Girl uglify Blake Lively using nothing but a bad camera angle and a strawberry. But the wholesome kids of 90210 almost gave us sugar shock, even though there was a hint of bitterness.

We watched Barack Obama on Letterman, then we all blabbed about Sarah Palin going up against Charlie Gibson, and it made us about as happy as a pig in... well, never mind. But in more important political news, we got a clue about whether or not Tina Fey will return to Saturday Night Live.

We thought the "vamp walks into a bar" drama True Blood was cool, though not entirely original. We thought the "agent walks into a conspiracy" drama Fringe was pretty good as well. Not that you'd know it from the ratings.

We learned that rock star Shirley Manson is a shape-shifting Terminator. (Of course, Marilyn Manson is Kevin from The Wonder Years.)

We saw Entourage's Vinnie Chase trade a sex romp on the beach in Mexico for meeting interruptus back in Hollywood, and it was as fun as ever -- for us and, especially, for him.

We heard that the new season of 24 and the first season of Dollhouse were temporarily shutting down production due to "minor" script problems. Which is like a doctor telling you you'll have to undergo "minor" surgery.

...And we got terrible news about Paris Hilton.

Previously:
The Weekly Rewind: We're All Just a Bunch of Gossip Girls

"Fringe" Scores Meh Ratings While "90210" Viewership Drops

Bryan Christian — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 14:34:00 GMT

If you'd have said to us last week that 90210's numbers would drop by 30 percent in Week 2, we'd have said "Sure." It had a ton of hype, got some of the best numbers the CW ever had -- and that couldn't happen every week.

But we'd have fer sure thought that Fringe would have done a little better than "the best non-after-Idol premiere ratings for Fox since, um, Standoff." What does that even mean?

So, taking True Blood's equally, um, mellow opening into account, we gotta know: is there gonna be a big hour-long drama hit this year AT ALL?

PREVIOUSLY
Did "True Blood" Tank?

"Fringe": A Haiku Review

Ben Kallen — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:25:00 GMT

Slicker than X-Files,

More flashy than Lost -- Wonder

how much this thing cost?

Photo: Fox

Previously:
Fringe: New X-Files, New Clooney?
True Blood: A Haiku Review

"Fringe": New "X-Files", New Clooney? Yeah, Maybe So.

Bryan Christian — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:31:00 GMT

OK, so, despite the fact that an airline pilot's face dissolves to the point that his inferior maxillary bone drops right off his face, we can't quite call Fringe's pilot "jawdropping." It's excellent, intriguing, absorbing... but it didn't blow us away. Which is fine by us. Because that means we're not dealing with a Lost-type situation here. The first 45 frenzied minutes of that show's pilot were so strange and affecting that we sometimes think we're still under their sway, particularly when we find ourselves trying to reconcile all the magnetism, ghosts, and clockwork monsters made of smoke on that damned island.

But Fringe is content to work with milieus and characters that we've seen before: the mad scientist, the broken family, the federal agent searching for the truth in a vast single-wing conspiracy. Does it sound like we're disappointed? We're not. Fringe may do what it can to color in the lines, but man, what vibrant colors it chooses to color with.

Our story begins with a man, perhaps a diabetic, nervous on a bumpy international flight. He sticks himself with his insulin - but after he does, he starts to become violently ill. And we mean that literally: within seconds, his skin is bursting and falling off, and he's vomiting on the plane's crew. (Hence one dropped jaw.) The camera pulls back to reveal the plane still floating along in the sky as though nothing were wrong.

After the House-like credits, we're with a post-coital couple of FBI agents: Olivia Dunham and John Scott. Olivia is played by lovely Australian newcomer Anna Torv, who looks like Cate Blanchett but brings none of her theatrical intensity. That's a good thing; Torv's perfect for holding this occasionally preposterous operation together. She can be wary, touch, and girlish in the same scene, and she so far lacks the dreary pathos that, for example, made Mulder and Scully such bores. Anyway, Olivia and Scott work together, and their boss, a man named Broyles (who's played by Lance Reddick of The Wire, so you know he's awesome), might be onto their workplace affair. She says no; he says yes. After a few minutes of chatter -- you know, he says he loves her, she doesn't respond, blah blah -- Olivia's phone rings. After saying "Sir" a lot, she puts on her clothes and heads to Logan International Airport. (And when Scott's phone rings too, we guess we'll see him there too.)

When Olivia arrives, she gets the bullet from Charlie Francis, a colleague at the bureau: the plane from the opening has landed on autopilot, and whatever's in it made the last guy lose his lunch. Soon, Phillip Broyles, their boss, shows up, as does Scott. Broyles starts assembling teams to go in the plane -- and leaves Olivia out, referring to her derisively as "liaison." She protests and is allowed to enter the plane. It's plenty necrotastic in there -- blood and bones everywhere; no one's survived. However, someone that looks an awful lot like the diabetic pulls up in a car at the gate. Whaaaaaaa?

The next morning, the investigation continues in the office, as the agents are looking into the background of the passengers. Olivia suggests a number of avenues to pursue, but Broyles shoots her down, calls her "honey" (!) and sends her and Scott on a crap mission to look up a few storage units.

Olivia's pissed, but not so much that she doesn't have a heart-to-heart with Scott about what he'd said and she hadn't the night before. She tells him that she'd wanted to say she loved him too, and that's enough for him to be happy -- and enough for us to know that this guy's days are totally numbered.

In a trash dumpster, they find a bunch of used ammonia tubes, and start to open up all the units they can, um, Constitution be damned. After a few tries, they find what seems to be a test lab, packed with computers and monkeys. Olivia goes off to call for back up -- and a unit across the way opens up. There's a similar setup in that unit too, and the guy coming out runs away, with Scott (and soon) Olivia behind him. We don't get much of a look at the guy running, but after a few minutes of being chased he stops, and as Scott brings out his gun, the guy brings out a phone and activates bombs right behind him -- right where Scott is standing. Olivia, who catches some of the blast, loses consciousness.

She wakes up some time later to find that Agent Scott isn't actually dead -- he's in an induced coma, and doctors are trying to figure out what's wrong with him. His looks pasty and blue at first, like he's just had the world's worst freezerburn, but it later becomes clear that his skin is liquidizing.

Olivia reacts as any rational person would -- she shows up to work and starts to Fed-Google "dissolve flesh". This turns up the work of one Walter Bishop, whose work at Harvard once covered similar ground. When she tries to get permission from Broyles to see him, he refuses, saying it's not enough info to work with yet -- but it's clear that he also holds a grudge from her previous work as an investigator for the Marines. Olivia apparently got a friend of his kicked out of the Corps for what sounds like harassment, at best. If she wants to get to the doctor, he tells her, she'll have to do it on her own

That leads her to track down his son Peter in Baghdad, where he gets a lavish voiceover introduction -- "His IQ's 190, which is 50 points above genius," "He faked a career as a professor," stuff like that -- and where he's currently attempting to hustle his way into some juicy reconstruction engineering gigs. Also he is played by Joshua Jackson, who looks leaner and less fratty than he did back on the Creek -- and who yes, we are now assured, could be the New Clooney in a couple years if this goes well. He's not as good looking as George is, but he's got some of the same rakish, exasperated charm, and they seem to put him in the turtlenecks and henleys that Doug Ross used to wear just to lock it down a little. Anyways, we'll not go into his performance much except to say that he's not given so much to do here -- but with juicier material in the future, we defintely could see him breaking through to another level of stardom. (Called it!)

Anwway, back to the show. After asking nicely, Olivia gets the cold shoulder from Peter re: seeing his dad. "I'd rather stay in Iraq, that's how much I don't want to see my dad." Olivia explains that she can't see his father without a member of the family to get her in, and that another person's life is at stake. Peter replies "Sweetheart, we all care about someone who is dying." Well, since Peter seems to be getting all the good lines, Olivia goes straight for the jugular: she's seen his FBI file and knows everything about the jam he's in, why he needs cash, and if he doesn't come, she'll call the folks he's in dutch with. To which, out of good lines, he asks when they leave.

On the plane, Peter learns the truth about his father. He thought he worked on toothpase. Olivia explains that he spent his career working on the weirdest elements of science possible, the "fringe" stuff. Peter asks if his dad was Dr. Frankenstein. Olivia doesn't answer, but the show does -p- and the answer is maybe, because the next thing we know we are in a Massachusetts asylum, where the obviously unhinged and somewhat Unabomber-y Dr. Bishop floats between yammering incoherently and understanding all too well what's happened to Agent Scott.

And here we should note: John Noble, who plays Walter Bishop, is pretty much breaking out hearts all through this scene. We spent a long time trying to figure out on our own where we'd seen him, and then the New York Times spoiled it -- he's the self-pitying, self-delusional king that throws himself off Helms Deep in Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers. There's some of the tragic nobility of that character in Walter, but none of the twisted malice, at least not yet. Our heart sank every time something set Walter back, and leapt everytime he got excited, so much so that we're already shortlisting him for a supporting Emmy nom. Imagine House after years of electroshock and you get an idea of what we're talking about here.

Before he'll help, Walter asks to see his son, who (logic dictates) must have let Olivia in. Walter isn't pleased with this, and calls Olivia "sweetheart" again, but he goes in and has a small, strange exchange with his old man. Walter asks to be let out of the asylum to see Agent Scott; Olivia pulls out the old blackmail trick again after a nicely tense moment, Peter acquiesces again.

And here we note something else: this is a really handsomely produced show: the camerawork, the photography, and particularly the music, are all really top notch. Even the little title cards that tell you where you are ("Federal Building, Boston") are wonderful -- they're made to appear like they're freestanding metal letters just floating right in the first shot of the scene, or in one surprising instance, massive sand-colored ones lying flat in the Baghdad cityscape. Great stuff. Just saying.

Leaving the car, a newly shaved Walter reveals two things: one, that he used to share a lab with William Bell, who's the head of a presumably massive and dynamic company called Massive Dynamic, and two that he just pissed himself a little. Two ominous plot foreshadowings or just one? (We're hoping one, unless Depends decides to underwrite the show, in which case we're thoroughly fascinated.)

At the hospital, after some amusing protest from Peter, Walter collects a sample of Scott's now waxy -- literally, like cooling candle wax -- skin and freaks out when he learns his old lab is no longer there. Olivia asks Broyles to get his lab back for him; Broyles repsonds that he thinks he's figured out what was up with she and Scott. She doesn't care.

Then we got a commercial for Spore, guys. Sweet.

Open on the newly reopened lab. Walter starts giving a shopping list to Astrid, Olivia's assistant, that includes a bunch of equipment, blood, and a cow. This prompts a tiny spat between Peter and Olivia -- and this in turn marks the first moment where it's clear that Peter and Olivia must some day get it on. They share a small silent moment together here, sizing each other up, which is electric. Maybe this is why a few moments later, she confesses that there never was a file on him, she was lying, and why he confesses his problem: he's got gambling debts. (Turns out not even the smartest system works against cheaters!)

The doc comes up with some news, and it's not good. Agent Scott has a day more to live before his body crystallizes and fails. And Olivia still needs to find out what the guy that they were chasing looks like. So Walter suggests they, you know, get Olivia to take off her clothes, get in an sensory deprivation tank, drop some LSD, and stick a probe in her neck so that she can read his mind. 'Cause everyone knows that would work, right? Of course; that shit works on dead people, for crying out loud. Science 101, folks!

So she strips down and does it, pausing only to let Walter thank her for getting him out of the hospital. When the drugs kick in, and their electric pathways get synced up or whatever, Olivia does indeed find herself in his mind, or in some snazzy CGI lobby between their minds with junked cars and marble dance floors. And after Scott opens up his memories, she gets a look at the guy!

Back at the bureau the next day, they identify him as Richard Steig, the twin of the diabetc victim, and an employee of Massive Dynamic, which is great because Charlie's spent the whole ep trying to get an interview with Bell and coming up empty. They still don't get Bell, but they do get Nina Sharp, a Massive bigwig played by Molly Dodd herself, Blair Brown. Steig, she claims was fired from a weapons lab for trying to remove classified material. Then Molly Dodd rips the skin off her arm and reveals a robot arm to make Luke Skywalker proud. Cancer, she says; Bell saved her life and gave her that new arm. As if that wasn't enough, she asks Olivia: Do you think this is part of "the pattern"? Olivia doesn't know what she's talking about.

Soon they're raiding Steig's house and finding a secret test lab like the ones from before. Steig makes a run out an alleyway, interrupting a touching scene between the Bishop family before finally getting caught by Peter. (Both Steig and Olivia basically jump off buildings in the chase sequence, to which we were kind of "Wha???")

In questioning, Steig reveals nothing about what chemicals there were in the units that blew up (the answer to which will help Walter save Scott) until Peter -- not bound by any duty as an officer of the law -- starts cracking his fingers with a coffee cup. Then he talks.

Olivia has another chat with Broyles, who tells that "we're" impressed with her work. When she asks who, he begins to tell her about a number of other strange events that have been happening all over the world. Unaged children returning from years of being missing, a possible UFO sighting preceeding a tsunami... this is The Pattern. Would she like to investigate it? Olivia says no, but Broyles isn't buying it just yet.

Scott is transfused with the antidote to the chemicals and begins to improve. But when Olivia goes to visit him, she also visits Steig, who claims to have been in contact regarding the supervirus he was creating -- you know, the one he killed his brother and everyone on the plane with -- with someone in her department. Well, we all know where this is going, right? Yes, we do. When she retreives the tape, the voice is Scott's, and by the time she alerts Charlie, it's too late. Scott has put on the clothes Olivia dropped off for him, smothered Steig in his bed, and stolen an SUV. Olivia's in hot pursuit, and one somewhat short but decent car chase later, Agent Scott is pulling his bloody, dying self from the overturned SUV. "Ask yourself why Broyles sent you to the storage facility," he tells her before dying.

In the car, Charlie -- who's played by Kirk Acevedo, a guy we loved on Oz -- is given the onorous task of saying all the stuff that might justify Olivia investigating "The Pattern" so she doesn't have to say it herself: that the world is weird and their job is hard, blah blah blah. We get it guys. She's in. And she is, and so, surprisingly (not) is Peter, who just learned from his dad all the weird crap that was going on in that lab so long ago and knows that Olivia's gonna need all the help she can get.

And in a hallway somewhere entirely different, Steig's body is being being wheeled away. To a morgue? Nope; Nina Sharp turns up and asks how long's he been dead? "Five hours," says the atendant. "Question him," she says, closing the door behind her to leave an access panel showing a spinning leaf.

And then there's an ad for Massive Dynamic. Motto: "Our world is your world."

All in all a pretty good start. We feel like where the writing wasn't stellar, or maybe it was a little obvious, the acting and production more than covered up for it, and you gotta cut most pilots a little slack for setting stuff up, right? We will. In fact, we'd say that of all the things we like about this show, we like that it's a little by the numbers. It's been a while since there's been a good non-serial sci-fi show that we've been in to. Heck, we're surprised to say this, but Fringe is kind of the show we're expecting Eleventh Hour to be -- a slick episodic genre piece that we'll look forward to watching some hungover Sunday -- but without the Bruckheimer-y stuff. Weird, huh? Here's hoping the ladies love Pacey as much as we do (hey, we're not the only ones swinging his name around with Clooney's!) and Fox gives this Fringe enough time to unfurl at its own pace.

PREVIOUSLY:
Top Ten New Shows: #1 - "Fringe"
So Far, Our Picture Of The 2008-2009 Season Has A "Fringe" On Top...

Top Ten New Shows: #1 - "Fringe"

Bryan Christian — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 21:23:00 GMT

The new fall season is almost here. Starting next week, the cable and broadcast networks will begin rolling out their new shows to see if they take off like castaways on an island or singing casino managers. Here, then, are the top ten new shows we're most looking forward to seeing.

You tell us, kids. Are we supposed to not be pins-and-needles about a show that's half-X-Files, half-every-J.J. Abrams-show ever? Are we supposed to be turned off by early reports that the pilot's a little underwhelming, or the empty rows at its Comic-Con panel, or the fact that it's co-created by the team responsible for Transformers? 'Cause we are, actually, a little – and yet, despite all that, we're still more hopeful about getting wrapped up in this show (which in a nutshell tells the tale of a weird, worldwide conspiracy that causes the FBI to ally themselves with mad scientists) than in any of the other new shows this fall. Don't get us wrong: J.J. Abrams is due for another failure right about now; our money's just on it being his big-budget Star Trek reboot that flops. (There, we said it.)

And, like we said a while back, Joshua Jackson could be the next TV-era Clooney if he plays his cards right -- and there's no way we'd miss that. It's Pacey Witter, for God's sake!

Fringe (Tuesdays at 8PM EST) premieres Tuesday, September 9 at 8PM EST on FOX

TOP TEN NEW SHOWS 2008

#1. "Fringe"
#2. "True Blood"
#3. "90210"
#4. "Life On Mars"
#5. "The Mentalist"
#6. "Sons of Anarchy"
#7. "Do Not Disturb"
#8. "Eleventh Hour"
#9. "Kath & Kim"
#10. "Knight Rider"

"Alias" Creator Was Just As Confused As Everyone Else

Ben Kallen — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 21:15:00 GMT

Remember Alias, that spy show starring Jennifer Garner as a good guy working for the bad guys while thinking they were the good guys, then pretending to be a bad guy pretending to be a good guy pretending to be a bad guy, or something like that? And then there was all this stuff about quadruple agents and clones and prophecies by some medieval inventor who created a killer robot driving instructor who travels back in time for some reason?

Well, now it turns out that creator J.J. Abrams didn't know what the hell was going on, either.

According to Washington Post columnist Lisa de Moraes, Abrams told an audience at the TV Critics Press Tour, "I was at my friend Greg Grunberg's house a year ago -- he was on Alias and [is on] Heroes now -- and Alias was on.... I was watching and I wasn't thinking about it. I watched a few minutes and was so confused. I was like, literally, it was impenetrable. I was like: 'I know I should understand this. I read the -- who the [expletive] is THAT guy?!' "

So, no, viewers, you weren't alone in your confusion. The busy writer-producer has asserted that his upcoming show Fringe, about investigators into supernatural events, will be easier to follow. Still, someone may want to remind him of that promise right around season 3.

Previously:
So Far, Our Picture of the 2008-2009 Season Has a Fringe on Top

Lost? It's Complicated

So Far, Our Picture Of The 2008-2009 Season Has A "Fringe" On Top...

Bryan Christian — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 16:15:00 GMT

... with a Dollhouse right beneath it. We know, you're all like "How could warmed over X-Files ;look better to you than a Joss Whedon/Eliza Dushku project?" Hey, actually, that's a good question, considering how sad we were when Dushku left Buffy and didn't wind up with her own show. Our answer?

Well, for one thing, from the previews that we've seen, it seems like Fringe will handle its overall mythology -- the big conspiracy behing it all -- a little more solidly than Dolllhouse, thus increasing the odds that we'll wind up coming back after the first couple weeks.

Also: watch this shit and tell us that Joshua Jackson might not be the new Clooney. Dushku's a hottie and all -- but if this is Pacey's year to break out, we're damned if we're gonna miss that. He's been due for another shot for far too long.

Click through for the Dollhouse trailer and see if you agree.