The Weekly Rewind: Summer's End

Ben Kallen — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 21:35:00 GMT

Man, what an action-packed few days! We had the Olympics finale, a political convention, the start of a big holiday weekend, and -- most important of all -- the buildup to the new fall TV season. So how 'bout we look back on it all with the highlights of the week:

We counted down the top 10 new shows and the top 10 returning shows for the upcoming season. That's, yes, 20 shows worth watching. We know that some critics are worried about the overall quality of the fall schedule... but, really, if 20 isn't enough for them, they should maybe start thinking about reading more books.

We found 18 "memorable TV moments" that the Emmy people left off their list. And yet they still won't let us present the award for Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy!

We met the new American Idol judge, and she's attractive, articulate and successful. Let's hope she keeps her Coke cup away from Paula.

We watched some hilariously terrible music videos featuring TV stars. If you've ever wondered what the Internet was made for, this is it.

We thought we'd lost Denise Richards, and then we maybe got her back, but then we weren't sure we really wanted her after all. Just like Charlie in that one episode of Two and a Half Men!

We learned that even after all this time, we're still amused by the phrase "Stifler's mom."

We saw Mackenzie Phillips get in trouble with drugs, and David Duchovny get in trouble with sex. Where the hell is Dr. Drew when you need him?

Helloooo, Mr. Phelps! Goodbyyyye, Mr. Bush!

We got ready to spend the waning days of summer with a nice long weekend of TV. Hey, it's our job -- what's your excuse?

Photo: AP

Previously:
The Weekly Rewind: We Want Our Fun TV

"Secret Life of the American Teenager": Thank You God, Stifler's Mom

Lindy Parker — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 19:20:00 GMT

So, week after week, we've watched The Secret Life of the American Teenager wondering if a show was ever as boring in the history of boring shows. Fast forward to this week when guest star Jennifer Coolidge shows up at the door of Tom, the mentally disabled older brother of the head cheerleader, and says, "Tom, you know it'll cost you money if you want me to be your friend..."

Presumably, Tom needed a friend, found JC on a sex website, asked her to come over during his parents' weekly date night, and ordered a pizza to share. JC can see right away that Tom's not after sex, so she decides to charge him two hundred dollars for a conversation instead. Here's the highlight:

"If you don't pay me the money, a very mean guy is going to come and beat you up with a bag of oranges that he keeps in his trunk."

Our response: Yes! Finally, the writers of this show have thrown in the towel and said, "Well, let's just write the most bizarre stuff we can think of." Genius. But, wait...

Out of nowhere, JC launches into a public service announcement decrying the dangers of prostitution. Sigh. We should've known the creator's of 7th Heaven couldn't just leave it at bizarre. Still, JC's little interlude with Tom was the best time we've had on this show in...ever.

The Remote Island : Jennifer Coolidge

The Weekly Rewind: Summer's End

"Secret Life of the American Teenager": Thank You God, Stifler's Mom