The Remote Island : The Office

"The Office" Parody: Why Every Show Should Have a "24" Crossover [VIDEO]

Lindy Parker — Thu, 14 May 2009 16:20:00 GMT

Every once and a while, there are those few parody videos that just seem to start our day off right -- not ulike an egg mcmuffin in that way....

Okay, so it's not the best spoof we've ever seen, but come on -- the part where they're watching the microwave beep down the seconds? Egg Mcmuffin.

Previously:

Photo of the Day: Office "Peeps"

Strange But True: Kiefer Sutherland Headbutts Designer Defending Brooke Shields

The Office: Now and Forever

"The Office" Musical Rocks

Mindy Kaling Will Create And Star In An NBC Comedy

Jake Kalish — Wed, 06 May 2009 16:12:00 GMT

No worries - she's not leaving The Office. Damn, that's a big workload, Kelly Kapoor. All that, and the blog? Who do you think you are, Jay Leno? Or are we looking at the new Tina Fey? And how will Tina Fey feel about being the old Tina Fey?

Anyway, we have to grudgingly admit that this is a much better gig than what we had planned for Mindy Kaling. Also, a whole lot more money - it's reportedly a 2-year, seven-figure deal.

PREVIOUSLY:

The Mindy Kaling/Kelly Kapoor Fashion And Beauty Book - We Want A Cut

Read Mindy Kaling's Blog

"The Office", Now And Forever

Idris Elba As James Bond? That'd Be Change We Could Believe In

Jake Kalish — Wed, 06 May 2009 14:33:00 GMT

So the internets and their various blogospheres been overloaded with folks saying it's about time for an African-American James Bond. Agreed. And after all this chatter, and some Jamie Foxx speculation (blah) the top two candidates have emerged:

1. Idris Elba, the former Stringer Bell, a Brit who would be likely be an amazing Bond and who shared his thoughts on playing 007 with The Guardian UK; and

2. A man who could singlehandedly take down the entire James Bond franchise...

Diddy wants it. And he reportedly blew 750 grand on his 007 audition tape. Oh, Dammit, Puffy, you dancing fool. Now, Sean Combs is actually not a half-bad actor - he was pretty good in Monster's Ball, and his role on Broadway in A Raisin In The Sun was generally well-received. But he's no Idris Elba. And he's definitely no James Bond. Unless James Bond is now sampling entire Police songs and dancing around in a white suit.

Idris Elba, on the other hand, would be perfect. Here's what he had to sa y:

Who wouldn't like to play Bond? Do I think it will happen? No, but I've got what it takes to do it. I can run around, flirt with ladies and drink. Plus I'm English.

Well, Idris, if that were all it took, then Rod Stewart could be James Bond. But yes, you've got what it takes.

PREVIOUSLY:

Jennifer Aniston Wants To Be A Bond Girl

Are The Writers of "The Office" Obsessed With "The Wire"?

Idris Elba Joins The Office

Britain, Still Reeling From The Revolutionary War, Ranks American Television Shows

"The Wire": David Simon's Original Pitch To HBO

OK, Which Prankster At "The Office" Created This Website?

Chenda Ngak — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 15:25:00 GMT

In last week's episode of The Office, we were introduced to The Michael Scott Paper Company. And we noticed that the website went up just in time. So, who's behind it?

The website has pictures of Michael's new office, the coupon that causes conflict between Ryan and Pam, and even merchandise. OK, we had to admit that at first we thought it was like another spoof site in honor of The Office. And we even went through the effort to looked it up on WhoIs.net. In the end, we figured that site had to be legit. Who else would have a PDF of the coupon?

So the question remains: Was it Michael, Pam, or Ryan who put up the website? Will it be mentioned in this week's episode? We've got our greenbacks on Pam. She went to Pratt, after all, and It seems like the writers are finally giving her a break with the advent of her first paper sale. Also, Ryan? Never.

PREVIOUSLY:

Out Of "The Office": Melora Hardin Gets An FX Drama Pilot

Photo Of The Day: "Office" Peeps

"The Office", Now And Forever

Are The Writers Of "The Office" Obsessed With "The Wire"?

Out Of "The Office": Melora Hardin Gets An FX Drama Pilot

Jake Kalish — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 18:44:00 GMT

You go, Jan Levinson! This and the Hannah Montana movie - Melora Hardin's on a roll. This show sounds really cool, and also stars one of our absolute favorite character actors...

Melora Hardin of "The Office" is moving to cable, landing the female lead opposite Holt McCallany on FX's drama pilot "Lights Out."

Elias Koteas and Kevin Conway also have been tapped as leads on the pilot from Fox TV Studios and FX Prods.

Penned by Justin Zackham, "Lights Out" centers on Patrick "Lights Out" Leary (McCallany), an aging former heavyweight boxing champion who struggles to find his identity and support his wife (Hardin), a pediatric orthopedic surgeon, and three daughters after his fighting days are over.

That leads him to take a job as a legbreaker, collecting on unpaid gambling debts. He is diagnosed with pugilistic dementia (a neurological disorder that affects boxers who receive multiple blows to the head), so he decides he'll need to make another big payday to support himself and his family before his brain turns to jelly.

Conway will play Lights' father and former trainer, a widower who still runs a gym. Koteas will play Lights' boyhood friend who is his manager/business partner.

Elias Koteas! Duncan from Some Kind Of Wonderful! And since then, maybe our favorite "creepy guy" actor! Yes, plot a lot like The Wrestler. But we loved The Wrestler! Plus, we love Melora Hardin, Elias Koteas, and fictional legbreakers! (We are less fond of real legbreakers.) We're watching.

PREVIOUSLY:

Photo Of The Day: "Office" Peeps

"The Office", Now And Forever

Are The Writers Of "The Office" Obsessed With "The Wire"?

We Think "Parks And Recreation" Will Probably Get A Lot Better Than It Already Is. You?

Bryan Christian — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 15:18:00 GMT

We stand by our original take on things: P&R is a little too Office-like right now, and that is a disservice to its excellent cast.

BUT!

By the end of last night's pilot, with Leslie Knope and Ann Perkins tipsy from champagne and the promise of their newly formed committee (what, that's not a spoiler; you already know they're gonna try and build a park, right?), we could already see how nearly* every single character was gonna bring something great and un-Office-y to the show.

Like Paul Schneider, who brings such laid-back, unironic warmth and slowburn charm to his role that he's practically the anti-Office. And of course Amy Poehler, who we hope/expect will shed her early Michael Scott-isms (repeating what people say to sound on top of things; putting what she says in implied air quotes) and accentuate the loopily obsessive, chirpily aggressive side that shone through when she was bugging her boss, wooing Schneider's character over lunch, asking Ann if she could get a pancake too. That's the Amy Poehler we already love, right?

But what did YOU think? Click through and let us know in the comments!

* We're looking at you, intern girl!

PREVIOUSLY:

The Rumors Are True: "Parks And Recreation" Is Probably Too Much Like "The Office" [VIDEO]

The Fake Town From Amy Poehler's New Sitcom May Have Stolen Its Logo From A Real City

Amy Poehler's Sitcom Promo: Go On, Throw Us A Bone

Photo of the Day: "Office" Peeps

Lindy Parker — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 19:08:00 GMT

Somewhere out there is a book entitled 101 Things To Do with Peeps, and if there isn't we should write one, because truly, Easter peeps are like duct tape -- you can use them for anything, including these badass dioramas inspired by scenes from The Office -- yay, crafts! The above entry in Office Tally's Peeps Contest is from the "Office Olympics" episode during season 2.

Here's a couple more of our favorite "peep" scenes...

"Women's Appreciation" -- Final Scene

"Safety Training" -- Michael Pretends to Commit Suicide

View all entries at Officetally.com

Previously:

The Office: Now and Forever

"The Office" Musical Rocks

So, Jessica Alba And Jack Black On The Super Bowl "Office": Not Enough Or Just Right?

Are the Writers of The Office Obsessed With The Wire?

"The Office", Now And Forever

Jake Kalish — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 21:35:00 GMT

Starting in the fall, The Office will be syndicated. Everywhere and all the time...

Syndicated rights to The Office have been sold to stations covering 93% of the country, including all of the 50 top markets. Fox has rights in NY, LA, and Chicago. Yes, the show's already running repeats on TBS, but now Michael Scott and the rest of Dunder Mifflin will be ubiquitous. Our prediction: The Office will be the new Seinfeld - all over the telly, regurgitating awkwardness, selfishness, and cries of "that's what she said!" for perpituity.

PREVIOUSLY:

"The Office" Musical Rocks

Rainn Wilson Vs. Religious Persecution

The Mindy Kaling/Kelly Kapoor Fashion And Beauty Book: We Want A Cut

So, Jessica Alba And Jack Black On The Super Bowl "Office": Not Enough Or Just Right?

Are The Writers Of "The Office" Obsessed With "The Wire"?

Ricky Gervais Is Pulling The Superfecta

Jake Kalish — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 18:45:00 GMT

After wild success in TV (and then the web, children's books, and stand-up comedy) this is a step up, in a way, for Ricky - he's directing, producing and co-writing (with Stephen Merchant, his creative partner on The Office and Extras) an upcoming Sony feature film which kinda sounds like The Office meets Glengarry Glen Ross meets Stand By Me...

Here's the announcement:

Sony has boarded Ricky Gervais' "The Men at the Pru." Pic will be the second U.K. production to come out of the Sony Intl. Motion Picture Production Group, run by Deborah Schindler. Project is a coming-of-age tale about a group of men working at an insurance company in the 1970s...Gervais will also have a supporting role in the pic, which is set to go into production later this summer.

Damn. Books, blogs, podcasts, standup, writing, directing, producing, acting, playing with his piles of TV money - got enough to do there, Ricky? When does this man sleep?

PREVIOUSLY:

Ricky Gervais Corrupts Elmo (Or Is It The Other Way Around?) [VIDEO]

Ricky Gervais Shows Some Skin For PETA

Ricky Gervais Writes To Barack Obama About Paris Hilton

"The Office" Musical Rocks

Jake Kalish — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 18:22:00 GMT

This new compilation of musical moments from The Office may be our favorite Office-related video on You Tube. Although this other one, which Jenna Fischer loves, is pretty great too...

PREVIOUSLY:

Our Office Archive

Nekkid Jamie Bamber PETA Ad Almost Makes Us Forget About Sea Kittens

Chenda Ngak — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 17:41:00 GMT

Bears may be the number one threat to America, but our friends from Across the Pond are doing their part to protect the lovable critters. PETA has recruited Battlestar Galactica hunk, Jamie Bamber a.k.a. Lee "Apollo" Adama, to join an ad campaign to save the Canadian black bear. As in "bare"...

The decision was a no-brainer for Bamber.

I initially decided to do the PETA ad because a great friend of mine in L.A., Lucy Davis [Dawn from the original The Office], had just done a similar ad, and I love Lucy and it was a cause I didn't know about – I'll be honest. So as soon as Lucy opened my eyes, I was thrilled to join her and do my bit. (peta.org.uk)

Opens our eyes too. The "Bare Skin, Not Bear Skin" makes us want to make cat noises. The ad campaign continues a long history of provocative PETA ads (see below for a few of the more recent ones). Hey PETA, truce: hook us up with Robert Pattinson and we'll forget the whole Sea Kittens thing ever happened, mkay?

PREVIOUSLY:

PETA vs. Eliza Dushku

More PETA: Meat Causes Impotence?

Banned PETA Ad: Too Racy For The Super Bowl

"Battlestar Galactica"'s Jamie Bamber To Bong-Bong The U.K. Into Sexy, Law-Abiding Submission

Rainn Wilson vs. Religious Persecution

Jake Kalish — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 15:25:00 GMT

Who knew Rainn Wilson was a member of the Baha'i faith? Or that the members of this faith we'd kind of half-heard of and pretended to know about are being persecuted in Iran? And that the guy we know very well as Dwight Schrute would write an essay demanding this religious persecution cease?

Rainn Wilson wrote a Commentary on CNN's website entitled "Stop Religious Persecution In Iran." Hey, that's not funny, Dwight. Wilson realized he's an unlikely source for this sort of call to action, and admitted as much -

I assure you that what I'm writing about is no joking matter or some hoax perpetrated by a paper-sellin', bear-fearin', Battlestar-Galactica obsessed beet farmer...You see there's a 'trial' going on very soon for seven Baha'i national leaders in Iran.

They've been accused of all manner of things including being "spies for Israel," "insulting religious sanctities" and "propaganda against the Islamic Republic."

They've been held for a year in Evin Prison in Tehran without any access to their lawyer (the Nobel Laureate Shirin Ebadi) and with zero evidence of any of these charges.

When a similar thing happened in 1980, the national leadership of the Iranian Baha'i community disappeared. And this was repeated again in 1981.

In fact, since 1979, more than 200 Baha'is have been killed, holy places and cemeteries desecrated, homes burned, civil rights taken away and secret lists compiled of Baha'is (and even Muslims who associate with them) by government agencies.

It's bad right now for all the peace-loving Baha'is in Iran who want only to practice their religion and follow their beliefs. It's especially bad for these seven. Here's a link to their bios. They're teachers, and engineers, and optometrists and social workers just like us...

There is a resolution on the situation of the Baha'is in Iran being sent to Congress. Please ask your representatives to support it. And ask them to speak out about this terrible situation.

Thanks for reading. Now back to bears, paper and beets!

"Dollhouse" Gets A Little Love On iTunes

Olivia Purnell — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 20:00:00 GMT

Dollhouse, Joss Whedon’s latest endeavor performed, shall we say, disappointingly in the ratings this week. Surprisingly Whedonites didn’t really tune in for the premiere.

But it’s cool though. Dollhouse don’t need no stinking Nielson ratings. And Dollhouse fans don’t need old school 8pm Friday night television. They’ve got iTunes . . .

The Whedon faithful slowly but surely pushed Dollhouse to the number 1 spot on iTunes over the past few days. Although it debuted at 19th most popular on Saturday, Dollhouse is currently the top selling TV show on iTunes (io9.com).

Congratulations Joss, Dushku, Dhouse. This is great news. iTunes can be a huge factor in whether or not a show sticks around. Perhaps you’ve heard of a little show called The Office? Well way back when, La Oficina wasn’t doing so well in the ratings, but iTunes sales kept the show alive (tvsquad.com). Now The Office is thriving. Jim and Pam are together. Dwight’s set the building on fire. All’s well that ends well, no?

Dollhouse could come back swinging too.

Previously:

Top 3 Ways to Fix “Dollhouse”
"Dollhouse" What Were People Doing Instead Of Watching
"Dollhouse" And "Terminator" Get Gritty

Are We Down for HBO’s “Eastbound and Down”?

Olivia Purnell — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 20:00:00 GMT

Here’s what we like: Mullets, Country-Ass Accents, White-Boy Jheri Curls, Ball Jokes, and . . .

This guy.

Craig Robinson. You may recognize him as Darryl from The Office. If you don’t, cruise on over to nbc.com and watch the magic that is Craig. He was also in Pineapple Express with the star of Eastbound, Danny McBride.

Don’t get us wrong; we thoroughly enjoy Danny McBLT (that’s just a little nickname we’re trying on for size). Danny's Jerri-Mullet is the stuff of magic. We're sure he'll be great as fading Big League pitcher Kenny Powers. But Craig makes us giggle just looking at him. Try it. Look at him.

See? Giggletown.

We've seen Craig in HBO's behind the scenes docu-footage. And we think he'll probably only make a brief guest appearances. But it’s enough to get us started on Eastbound and Down. And who knows, the show could be like crack. Once you go crack, you never go back.

[Ed.: Can't let this end without including this:]

The Mindy Kaling/Kelly Kapoor Fashion And Beauty Book: We Want A Cut

Jake Kalish — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 22:30:00 GMT

Are you listening, Mindy Kaling? We've got an idea for you. A Mindy Kaling/Kelly Kapoor Fashion and Beauty book. It goes like this: Mindy gives the reader her tips, just as she does on her blog, Things I bought that I Love.

You know, stuff like this:

Why add shimmer to eyeshadow? Things evolve, people, and make everyone’s lives easier. I think this is basically the thinking behind the Industrial Revolution.

So that's already funny. But then Kaling ups the funny by writing in character as Kelly Kapoor, giving her critiques of Mindy Kaling's fashion and beauty tips. And then vice versa: Kelly Kapoor gives tips, Mindy Kaling critiques them.

You know this is comedy gold, Mindy. All we want is a moderate piece, like a lit agent's fee - 15%. Or possibly a lifetime supply of paper products. Call us.

PREVIOUSLY:

Read Mindy Kaling's Blog

Jake Kalish — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 20:33:00 GMT

Fans of The Office already know all about Mindy Kaling's character, Kelly Kapoor. But you might not know that Kaling is also a writer for The Office (she wrote last night's ep, and next week's) and has a very funny blog about shopping. It's called Things I Bought That I Love. Here are three samples:

1) This blog is for things that I bought that I love so much that I want to recommend them to other people. I know that it’s not a soapbox for me to rant. But then I was like: who made that rule? I can do whatever the F I want on my weird blog no one reads. If Bono can constantly be talking about Africa I can occasionally complain about tiny shit that bothers me. So I will gripe.

2) I can’t help but notice the Play insignia looks a lot like our friend Gossamer, the Looney Tunes monster in the haunted castle who chases Bugs Bunny and loves a good manicure now and again. Take a look for yourself.

Look, I know what you’re thinking. Stop infantilizing yourself, Kaling. But I can’t help it. I love tiny things with eyeballs. I once heard that Amy Sedaris had a penchant for gluing googly eyes on everything around her, and it made me fall utterly in love with her and want to live in her apartment with her.

3) Neon is the new metallic? Indians are the new Jews? You can waste a lot of your day coming up with “blank is the new blank”s. But since I’m out on script this week and have no one to talk to all day, I can think about it all I want. So yeah, neon is the new metallic. I love the way neon looks. It’s part 80’s all-star and part traffic cone.

So check it out, and maybe buy something. As Kaling writes, "To be even be considered a tastemaker in any small sense is a great compliment to a vapid person whose priorities are all wrong."

So, Jessica Alba And Jack Black On The Super Bowl "Office" -- Not Enough Or Just Right?

Bryan Christian — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 15:27:00 GMT

Any thoughts on how little special guest stars Jack Black, Jessica Alba, and Cloris Leachman were actually onscreen during last night's Super Bowl Office special? We're torn. On the one hand -- Jessica Alba was on the show? Really? Did she have, you know, lines or anything? On the other, as Vulture noted, lots of times big guest star spots can ruin special Super Bowl episodes, jamming characters into situations that are so dumb or out of, well, character that they're ignored for the rest of the show's run.

So what did you think? A canny way to squeeze big stars into an otherwise normal episode or a lame shout-out to anti-piracy efforts?

Are The Writers of "The Office" Obsessed With "The Wire"?

Lindy Parker — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 19:00:00 GMT

Yesterday, we gave you the he-said/she-said perspective on The Office's new ex-Wire hire, Idris Elba, and it started us thinking about Amy Ryan's turn as Michael Scott's HR girlfriend. Are the writers of The Office laying in wait to ambush cast members from The Wire with offers they can't refuse?

"Now there is an actual trend of Wire characters appearing in Scranton, as Idris Elba, a.k.a. Stringer, joins the cast as Steve Carell's rival. And I think I found the source of the cameo-love.

Two years ago, Office writer/actor B.J. Novak was getting hounded to watch The Wire. And piecing the puzzle together, that hounding was mainly coming from his coworkers and friends, and eventually Novak caved and thought the show was amazing and so now everyone who writes for The Office are giant star-fuckers when it comes to HBO's crime-drama. Mystery=Solved." (Jossip)

Whatever the reason, it seems as though The Office is the big network primetime in the sky for actors whose time is up on The Wire.

Previously:

Idris Elba Joins "The Office": The Girl Version

Idris Elba Joins "The Office": The Boy Version

All in the Game: "The Wire" Alumni Make New Moves

Steve Carell Buys A Massachusetts General Store

Jake Kalish — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 18:29:00 GMT

Steve Carell has just bought a 155-year-old General store in Marshfield Hills, Mass, where he lives part-time. The store will be run by Carell's sister-in law, but Carell wrote the Boston Globe that he will "be manning the cash register, and stocking the shelves as time permits!" How long before people ask for paper products, and then start giggling?

PREVIOUSLY: Our Office Archive

Idris Elba Joins "The Office": The Boy Version

Bryan Christian — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 16:49:00 GMT

Suppose we should have seen this coming, what with this season's subplot involving all dem bitches from the Stamford branch creepin' up on Scranton corners and cutting into Michael's juice, but still. Weird, huh?

Thesp Idris Elba has been cast on "The Office" as a new rival to Dunder Mifflin regional manager Michael Scott (Steve Carell).
Elba, most recently seen in Guy Ritchie's "Rocknrolla," will appear in six episodes later this season. Details are slim on his plot line, other than he'll play a no-nonsense hire at Dunder Mifflin's corporate office who will throw Michael Scott into turmoil.

Not that we don't love Idris Elba, but he can do comedy? Granted, The Office is excruciatingly drawn-out, brilliantly written comedy -- sorta like The Wire, but funny -- but still. Yuks? NBC seems to think so, and darned if we won't check it out ourselves!

Idris Elba Joins "The Office": The Girl Version

Lindy Parker — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 16:45:00 GMT

Is The Wire's Stringer Bell ready for a paper product beatdown?

"Thesp Idris Elba has been cast on "The Office" as a new rival to Dunder Mifflin regional manager Michael Scott (Steve Carell).
Elba, most recently seen in Guy Ritchie's "Rocknrolla," will appear in six episodes later this season. Details are slim on his plot line, other than he'll play a no-nonsense hire at Dunder Mifflin's corporate office who will throw Michael Scott into turmoil." (Variety)

Just one question: Is there a chance he could institute "shirtless Fridays" at Dunder Mifflin? Because if so, we're on board.

Bush's Farewell Address To Preempt Thursday Primetime?

Jake Kalish — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 14:28:00 GMT

George W. Bush wants to give a 15-minute address to the American people on Thursday. In Primetime. If the networks agree and the Presidential Address goes off at 9 p.m. Eastern, the traditional Presidential Address time, W's non-apology will preempt Grey's Anatomy, The Office, and CSI. He seems pretty determined to screw just one more thing up, doesn't he? Networks don't have to grant the request - they can say it'll be covered on cable, or isn't newsworthy. But they almost certainly will give an outgoing Prez his farewell. Great.

New Mama Amy Poehler Is Psyched About Her New Show . . . And Her Kid.

Olivia Purnell — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 19:45:00 GMT

Amy Poehler is kind of awesome. Remember her last Weekend Update rap (what you know, Eskimos?), that perfectly delivered gansta Palin? Silly question, how could you forget? Poehler broke it diz-own at like 8 and a half months pregnant. Now, two seconds after the birth of her son Archie, and her SNL departure. Amy is ready to talk about her latest venture: Her new show!!! (Multiple exclamation points should convey puppy-like excitement/mild leg humping).

Amy will start filming next month, working on a yet to be named NBC sitcom from the producers of The Office. She describes the show as:

"like Tina Turner in [1985's Mad Max] Beyond Thunderdome. I am a boss; I have an office. It's a whole different world. It's not a spin-off, it's a whole different place. [The Office's] Rashida Jones plays my friend." (people.com).

We are ready. Bring on Rashida. Bring on Poehler. Maybe there’ll be rapping!!!

Oh, almost forgot. Poehler spoke with People Magazine about her other venture: mommyhood. Talking about her new two-month-old son, Amy says, “He’s a sweet boy. Archie’s the best.” Cute. But, can he rap?

Previously:

Amy Poehler To Join "Office" Not Spinoff

Rashida Jones Joins New Amy Poehler Sitcome

"Colbert Report" Named Best Show On TV By Entertainment Weekly

Jake Kalish — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 15:31:00 GMT

Ken Tucker of Entertainment Weekly has made his list of the best and worst shows on television in 2008, with the Colbert Report taking the top spot. The best list distinctly avoids anything in the "reality" or documentary genre - everything is, at least in major part, scripted television. Also, no Battlestar, no Office, no animation of any kind. And no Daily Show - the son has surpassed the father, apparently. Here's EW's list - what do you think they left out?

BEST
1. The Colbert Report (Comedy Central)
2. The Wire (HBO)
3. 30 Rock (NBC)
4. The Shield (FX)
5. Lost (ABC)
6. Mad Men (AMC) 7. Fringe (Fox)
8. Late Show With David Letterman; The Late  Late Show With Craig Ferguson (CBS)
9. Dexter (Showtime)
10. In Treatment (HBO)

WORST
1. The Moment of Truth (Fox)
2. American Idol (Fox)
3. Private Practice (ABC)
4. Valentine (The CW)
5. Knight Rider (NBC)

PREVIOUSLY: Our Colbert Archive

Jack Black Spends the Super Bowl in "The Office"

Lindy Parker — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 17:31:00 GMT

We've had a pretty good time with post-Super Bowl TV in the past haven't we? Remember when Julia Roberts stole Chandler's clothes and left him naked in the bathroom stall while Rachel and Monica were making out with Jean-Claude Van Damme? Or perhaps the time when George fantasized he was showering en masse with Meredith, Izzie and Christina? Well, in the grand tradition of stacking the sports frenzy aftermath with celebrity guest stars to keep people watching after the game rather than passing out in a beer-and-wings coma, Jack Black will pay a visit to the The Office for this year's post-Super Bowl must see TV...

The hitcom's producers are keeping the specifics of Black's stint under lock and key, but a just-released NBC press release says this of his role: "Some of the office workers try to secretly watch a bootlegged Hollywood movie during the workday. The movie stars Jack Black and other notable Hollywood actors." (Entertainment Weekly)

We imagine it will be funny, but it'd be hard to top this:

"The Office": Just In Time For Fake Christmas, The Fake Princess Unicorn Website

Bryan Christian — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 21:46:00 GMT

According to last night's ep, they're all out in Scranton, but maybe you can order your loved ones a Princess Unicorn on the official website? No? Hang on, what's that fine print say?

Caution:

Wash hands thoroughly after handling Princess Unicorn.
Do not play with Princess Unicorn if you are allergic to lead based paint.
The spike on Princess Unicorn is incredibly sharp, so Princess Unicorn can pierce the sky. It can also pierce your skin. Handle with care

Hmm. Well, maybe the t-shirts are safer?

Click through for the full ep, if you have no idea what we're talking about.

The Weekly Rewind: Seriously, Is This Election Over Yet?

Ben Kallen — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 21:30:00 GMT

Nope, not yet! TV's still all about politics -- and, on the other hand, distracting ourselves from politics -- as we'll find out when we recall the highlights of the week.

We watched hot Sarah Palin on SNL, and she was funnier than the average guest host. Coming soon: Ellen Show dancer Barack Obama. Too bad one of these two will be elected soon -- we smell comedy team! (Don't forget to add this guy.)

Opie Cunningham came back through time from 30-plus years ago! (To, um, tell us how to vote today.)

We watched the season premiere of 30 Rock -- before it aired on TV! The Internet is cool.

We heard that someone still doesn't like the looks of Dancing With the Stars' Cheryl Burke. Someone crazy.

...Or else maybe Dancing is cursed.

We set Lance Bass against Joey Fatone, and Dwight against Gareth. Remember, no talking about Fight Club!

We heard that Lindsay Lohan's having problems -- and this time, it's personal.

We saw the new CSI tech naked, which probably means she'll be murdered off soon.

We heard that William Shatner got into a spat with George Takei. Did you know they used to work together?

Just like Desmond, we predicted what's going to happen next on Lost.

We saw a preview of 50 Cent's new show, and it was kind of like business school. Heck, the guy's name is money.

We got mad at Fringe for being too much like other shows, but then realized that without other shows, it wouldn't be about anything.

What the hell, AMC? You say you're bringing back Mad Men, but neither the creator nor the actors have contracts yet? Is that any way to treat the best show on TV?

We wondered why anyone would want to dress like this lady anyway.

More Dexter, yay! More Knight Rider -- huh?

We saw Se cond Becky give a loud kiss-off to Ted on How I Met Your Mother. We love ya, sister, but please do not get back with J.D. on Scrubs.

And we noticed that House and Gray's Anatomy have figured out what we really want in a medical series: girl-on-girl action.

But not this kind.

Previously:
The Weekly Rewind: Everyone's a Comedian

Imaginary TV Fights: Dwight Schrute vs. Gareth Keenan

Bryan Christian — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 21:30:00 GMT

Thursday night, everyone. Time again for another episode of the American version of The Office. They're now on episode 69, which is not only a sexy number but also signifies 55 more episodes than the original UK version ever had. A triumph of American know-how over those wimpy Brits? Oh oh, we just cahn't do any more episodes than 14... waah, waah, tally ho, we want our ba-ba!

We're not so sure. David Brent's problems never got as soapy as Michael Scott's -- paternity, divorce -- and Tim and Dawn's romance had its ups and downs, but never anything as Ross-and-Rachel-y as Jim and Pam. Maybe there's still an honor to having fewer eps?

Well, only one way to figure this one out: a knockdown, dragout fight between the two creepiest and most dangerous guys each show has to offer. And so, we ask our good palJake Kalish, world famous balloon animal husbandrist, noted cryptopopculturalist, and author Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights, to weigh in on the question. For the intercontinental honor of their shows, who would win: Dwight Schrute or Gareth Keenan?

GARETH KEENAN	DWIGHT SCHRUTE
Training: Was a lieutenant in the Territorial Army	Training: Purple belt in Goju-Ryu karate
Ally: David Brent, reluctantly	Ally: Michael Scott, reluctantly
Potential Advantage: Due to his military training, he now claims to be able to "kill a man with a single blow."	Potential Advantage: Because he resorbed his twin while still in the womb, he now claims to have "the strength of a grown man and a tiny baby."

THE FIGHT

Dwight brings to the battle his impressive assortment of weaponry, including a crossbow, pepper spray, brass knuckles, a stun gun, Molotov cocktails, and a samurai sword. However, these weapons prove unwieldy, and he asks for a moment to select the weapon that will best kill Gareth. This gives Gareth an opening, and he goes to grab his staplers. Unfortunately, one is suspended in jell-o and the other is glued to his desk. Hand to hand combat it is! Keenan's Territorial Army training gives him the upper hand over the much larger Schrute, but in their struggle, Dwight manages to grab his crossbow and shoot an arrow through Gareth's right pupil, effectively ending the battle, despite Keenan's protestations that he can continue fighting with an arrow in his eye. However, since in both versions of The Office success means spectacular failure, Gareth is declared the winner for being the bigger loser.

WINNER: GARETH KEENAN

JAKE KALISH is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Blender, Men’s Fitness, and Playboy, among other publications. He could totally kick your ass.

Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights is published by Three Rivers Press

PREVIOUSLY:
Imaginary Fights: Lance Bass vs. Joey Fatone
Imaginary TV Fights: Stamos vs. Stamos
Imaginary TV Fights: "Dexter" vs. Everybody From "C.S.I."
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Imaginary TV Fights: Shatner vs. Shatner vs. Shatner

American "Ab Fab": There's Good News and Bad News

Ben Kallen — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 20:20:00 GMT

After more than a decade of trying, American TV is finally moving forward with a remake of Absolutely Fabulous, the campy British sitcom about "two boozy, over-40 best friends who are desperate to stay hip and youthful." So is that a good thing or a bad thing?

Answer: Both!

The good news:

-- Some major talent is behind the re-do, including the show's original cocreator and costar Jennifer Saunders, SNL writer Christine Zander, and Arrested Development creator Mitch Hurwitz. They're likely to make sure the show's bordering-on-offensive humor doesn't get watered down, but doesn't go too far over the top either.

The bad news:

-- Yeah, they've been trying to do this for years, and always unsuccessfully. First Roseanne Barr attempted, and failed, to remake the show with actress-writer Carrie Fisher (whose novels have an Ab Fab flair). Cybill was pretty much a clone of the show, as was the short-lived High Society -- not to mention the upcoming Kath and Kim, which, though actually a remake of an Australian comedy, is in the same ballpark.

-- Remakes of British TV shows: For every great success like The Office, there's a terrible failure like Coupling.

-- A show about a pair of nutty female alcoholics in L.A.? There already was one: The Minor Accomplishments of Jackie Woodman, with Laura Kightlinger. Okay, it was on the Independent Film Channel, which means just about nobody ever saw it, but it was actually pretty funny. (Check out one of the episodes here.)

The wait-and-see news:

-- Casting is everything. Any suggestions?

Previously:
Top 10 New Shows: Kath and Kim

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Out Of "The Office": Melora Hardin Gets An FX Drama Pilot

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Imaginary TV Fights: Dwight Schrute vs. Gareth Keenan

American "Ab Fab": There's Good News and Bad News