The Remote Island : Vanessa Hudgens

Ain't No Party Like a Zac Efron Pool Party [VIDEO]

Lindy Parker — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 14:00:00 GMT

On the list of people we wouldn't want to see at a pool party, Brody Jenner and Joel Madden are right near the top. However, show us Queen Latifah, Lance Bass, and a margarita and we are in there like swimwear. Apparently, the folks at Funny or Die are totally with us on this...

Hard to believe Kim Kardash didn't get in on this action. Our favorite quote: "You smell just like a waffle." Ha. Even funnier than V.Hudge getting all shrill about poop.

Photo of the Day: Zac Efron, Down and Dirrty

Lindy Parker — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 15:00:00 GMT

This is our month to be skeeved out by Zac Efron and his ever-increasing greasiness. First, his mom's buying him mammoth amounts of condoms, now he's romping in the dirt and posing for pictures with naked girls...

We just want to say for the record that we LOVE Interview Magazine with a limitless and unceasing passion, and actually we kind of dig this photo too -- there's just something about Zac Efron and his infancy that still gives us pause. Are we the only ones who have a hard time picturing him doing anything sexier than dancing around in a Chachi Arcola leg bandana? And more importantly, who is this naked girl straddling Z.Ef in the mud?

The lucky gal is 20-year-old Lithuanian model Edita Vilkeviciute. Just before they started to get dirty, Vilkeviciute admitted to the High School Musical golden boy she didn't know who he was. "Since I've never watched American television, I didn't understand until everyone started asking me to get his autograph," she tells writer Leila Brillson.
But then Mr. Efron had something to share, too. "Zac finally admitted to me that this was his first real fashion shoot," Vilkeviciute says. "So we both got to relax." (E! Online)

We can't help it, there's something about the way E! Online says "Mr. Efron" that has us newly creeped out. What do you think? Is the photo sexy or skeevy? Feel free to weigh in below...

Previously:

Separated at Birth: Zac Efron and the Teenage Bruce Willis

Today in TMI: Zac Efron (and His Mom) Love a Condom

Zac Efron: Really? Star of the Year?

Could Drake Bell Be the Next Zac Efron?

Today in TMI: Zac Efron (and His Mom) Love a Condom

Lindy Parker — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 19:04:00 GMT

You know when you hear something that freaks you out, and yet, you feel almost irresistibly compelled to tell everyone else you know, just so you're not the only one who has to carry that particular mental image through your day? Just a heads up, that's what's happening here.

Here's a quote we could've gone our whole lives without hearing from High School Musical star, Zac Efron: "[My mom]'s like, 'I knew you were being sexual!' But she understood. My stocking was full of condoms this Christmas. She buys me the economy box." (Us Magazine)

We don't know about you, but we're not sure what skeeves us out more: the image of Zac Efron's mom buying her adult son an economy size box of condoms, the fact that he felt comfortable sharing that information with the world at large, or that, against our will, the phrase "economy box" has us picturing Zac and V. Hudge going at like rabbits 24/7. All we can say is, thank god he refrained from emphasizing what size condoms they were. We can't handle talk of barely legal penis size. We just can't.

Oscars 2009: Letter to the Stars

Lindy Parker — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 16:00:00 GMT

First things first, Freida Pinto -- You may be surprised to learn that we were holding our own private awards ceremony last night, and you were the winner. We love this dress. We love your hair, your make up, your overall unearthly beauty. Well done you...

Vanessa Hudgens -- We're not 100% sure what's happening here. Putting aside the fact that your dress appears to be that unfortunate combo of unflattering and ill-fitting, we have two other concerns. First, the vertical ribbons that stop abruptly at your knees put us vaguely in mind of a straight jacket. Also, the black and white flowers stuck on the front seem to be little more than a decorative after thought. We'll be honest, we expected more from you -- we've seen you rock it out. We suppose you can't win them all.

Robert Downey Jr. -- We hated your movie, we thought it was pointless and unfunny (also, what's the deal with you being nominated? Is this Hollywood's way of saying blackface is okay now, because last time we checked it was still offensive). That being said, WE LOVE YOU, and couldn't be happier to see you doing so well. Please continue doing all manner of non-blackface roles so that we can camp out at the theater and bask in your presence. Also, your wife is hot.

Beyoncé -- It's time for some tough love. No more House of Dereon. It's just not working out. Go to Angel Rodriguez or Michael Kors so they can give you something that doesn't force us to ask, "how do you solve a problem like Maria?"

Taraji P. Henson -- Can we call you, TP? Girl, you look amazing. We want you to be our new BFF so that we can trade clothes, and hair secrets (yours is so shiny!), and talk shit about Jay Manuel and the telestrator that he used on each of your dress layers. Also, it was nice of you to smile so graciously during Goldie Hawn's tribute to you, because we know you were thinking, "damn, my boobs look so much better than hers."

Miley Cyrus -- We've been back and forth on this look, but in the end we've decided that we like it. Even though, our first reaction is to picture you as one of those little dolls born from plastic flowers, we still think you look nice. Nice and doll-like. That said, we're not at all sure what you're doing at the Oscars. You're not presenting, you're not nominated and we're fairly certain you're not a member of the Academy. Did ABC really need red carpet candy so badly?

Natalie Portman -- There's nothing negative we can say about you here, except to express our wild jealousy. You look stunning. In our Oscar fashion awards, you came in second.

And finally, Amanda Seyfried -- Oh Amanda. We know that technically you're wearing Valentino Haute Couture, but can we just call a spade a spade? It's Jessica McClintock c. 2001. Good rule of thumb for the beginner: Just say no to bows.

Previously:

Live Blogging From The Oscars Red Carpet

Vanessa Hudgens Goes Werewolf for the Twilight Movies?

Lindy Parker — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 20:00:00 GMT

Here's the thing about the Twilight movie, we enjoyed the books as much as the next person, but the movie left a little to be desired (Nikki Reed's ill-advised hair extensions, the vaguely rainbow-trout quality to the luminescent vampire skin). Regardless, given our obsession with the High School Musical frenzy, we couldn't be more thrilled to hear our girl Vanessa Hudgens is thinking of jumping on board the Twilight train...

Could we be seeing Vanessa Hudgens donning fangs and a hairy costume to play a werewolf in the next Twilight film? In unconfirmed reports, Entertainment Weekly says that the High School Musical star has auditioned for the role of disgruntled werewolf Leah Clearwater in the forthcoming Twilight sequel, New Moon. (metro.co.uk)

Granted, it's not exactly a signed contract, but still, Vanessa Hudgens as teenage werewolf? Hi-larious. Now if they could just find a part for Zac Efron.

Why Are The "HSM" Girls Dressed Like Thrift Store Brides?

Lindy Parker — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:20:00 GMT

Okay, we're just going to say it: we're a lot weirded out by this picture. Why are V. Hudge and T.Dale perched on Zac Efron, looking like a trio of Disney Channel polygamists? Or possibly like oversized toddlers festooned to re-enact scenes from Big Love. Perhaps it's the ill-fitting nature of both of these bride-y garments that puts us in mind of a dress up box. A dress up box in Utah. We are perplexed.

Our Trip to "High School Musical 3"

Lindy Parker — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 16:20:00 GMT

Okay, so we're not saying we'd want to see a movie this way every week, but we gotta say our weekend viewing of High School Musical 3: Senior Year was worth it if only for the glorious spectacle of it all. The Disney Channel's third HSM installment took in nearly 82 million dollars worldwide -- the biggest global success since The Dark Knight. Disney has to be thanking their lucky stars these zany singing, dancing kids are so likable.

Here's some highlights from our experience...

First of all, it goes without saying that we were in the big theater (the one with the balcony), the line to get in was so long that it was in four sections, and woe betide anyone who should accidentally step into the wrong part of the labyrinth. Everytime we thought we found the end, some mother of three was waving angrily at us from another part of the hallway and yelling, "Hey, the line end's back HERE!" One kid spilled his popcorn in excitement before we actually got into the theater, and the sing-a-long began long before the doors opened. At one point, a twenty-ish girl in front of us turned around and said, "Do you think these kids are going to be singing during the movie?" which kind of made us wonder if she knew what she was getting herself into.

We feel like we should point out that while the 5-13 year olds were certainly the loudest and most enthusiastic age group in attendance, they were not the largest. That honor belongs to the 18-25 contingent. The most amusing age-group by far was the late-twenties-early-thirty-somethings that shuffled in the spilled popcorn, cleared their throats and talked about the election to distract themselves from the fact that they were voluntarily standing in a mile-long line sans children to see high school kids break into song in the cafeteria.

We weren't bothered by it. We even smuggled some tacos into the theater in our backpack so it really would be just like high school. A couple of things we tallied on our knee with a sharpie:

Number of homemade HSM t-shirts: 5

Number of times the audience broke into audible singing: 7

Number of kids we saw clutching either the DVD of one of the previous HSM movies or the soundtrack CD: 4 (Why? What are they going to do with those in a movie theater?)

Number of times Zac Efron's appearance on screen elicited spontaneous applause: 8

High School Musical 3: Get in Line Kiddies

Lindy Parker — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 20:20:00 GMT

So, here's what's happening: the Disney Channel made-for-TV franchise, High School Musical, is hitting the big screen this weekend and the advanced ticket sales have smashed the previous records (held by Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, The Lord of the Rings, and all the James Bond films). You may not know this about us, but we at the Remote Island LOVE a mob scene. Frenzy is our thing. So, you'd better believe we're going to be there amid all those pre-teens clutching their pearls with nervous excitement. Don't worry, we'll report back on Monday with details from the fray (ideally involving priceless quotes from aforementioned pearl-clutchers). Should we make one of those personalized fan t-shirts with glitter paint and a bedazzler?

Here's the trailer (our favorite part is the weird greased lightning dance with Efron in a bandanna -- these kids are nothing if not committed):

Tom Cruise Takes The "HSM" Kids Under His Wing

Lindy Parker — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 16:20:00 GMT

As she gears up for the theater release of the Disney Channel cash cow High School Musical 3: Senior Year, Vanessa Hudgens is taking all the advice she can get about life in the limelight -- and who better to dole out sympathetic counsel on navigating the treacherous waters of superstardom than Tom Cruise?

Tom's pearls of wisdom?

"Tom was so sweet and such a nice guy," Vanessa told Access Hollywood. "Just telling me there isn't much that you can do. [Fame's] just part of your life now, so you have to accept it. He is an amazing guy and I look up to him." Vanessa also got to meet Tom's better half, Katie Holmes. "I was at a Spice Girls concert because Victoria invited me and Suri, Kate and Tom walk in ... and I got to talk to them, they are all really great people." -- In Touch

Our roommate's reaction: "Weeeeeird. Weird. Weird. Weird. All around."

We kind of agree. We guess it's nice that he's putting himself out there to mentor those young and impressionable in the ways of the celebrity circus, but honestly, would you really want to take advice from someone who's gotten as all around bizarre as he has? Also, is it us or are his teeth slightly off-center?