PERSONAL ESSAYS
Starfirsts compiled by Dana Cook
 
Etta James, blues singer The Fons  
The boy, Alfonso, was extra cool. He controlled a gang called the Good Rockers that operated on the outskirts of town. He was also a piano player who fashioned himself after Horace Silver or Hampton Hawes. He wanted to be like Thelonious Monk, an out-there-on-the-edge player, but he wasn't as good as he thought he was. When it came to looks, though, he was better. He had these long eyelashes that laid down over almond-shaped eyes, sleek wavy hair and a tall, slim frame. He looked a little like Billy Dee Williams, only more rugged. He was the beautiful brother who took my cherry.
    I was fourteen, Fons was twenty-two. The first time was quick and icky. Nothing exciting. Looking at him was more exciting than loving him. I sure as hell didn't know what I was doing, and he didn't seem all that interested. I knew he would never respect me as his girlfriend. I was just a chubby gang chick with black-purple lipstick and a big ol' ponytail . . . We got it on two or three more times, but that was it. Turned out to be a little sister–big brother thing, never a full-blown romance. (San Francisco, 1952)


from Rage to Survive by Etta James with David Ritz (Villard Books, © 1995)


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