He's doing what a lot of people do — avoiding the issue. There are those who broadcast and dissect every nuance of their personal problems. Other people prefer to remain quiet and deal with things solo. Both are valid approaches to life, but it's a bitch when you've got two totally different types in a relationship, trying to hash something over.

Broadcasters often interpret a lack of expression as a lack of caring. If someone isn't talking about something, they must not be thinking about it. I'm not a Broadcaster myself (shocking, I know), and I'm sure there are legions of Quiets out there who will say this assumption isn't true. Conversely, a Quiet will interpret a Broadcaster's attempts at communication as an indication that that the Broadcaster doesn't believe in them or trust them. They hear "You're a useless man-boy who can't be trusted to look up a web site," instead of "Hey, I want to help you."

Unfortunately, although your situation has all the marks of a classic codependency, he can delay its resolution a lot longer than, say, a compulsive gambler or alcoholic. He's orgasming. That's one of the major pain points, already taken care of. Secondly, no one loses their house because of lack of intercourse. No one crashes their Acura or gets sacked from their job.

They do get dumped by their significant others and spouses. That's one element you have control over. Have a conversation in which you make it clear that you care for him, but you're not going to put up with continued inaction on this issue. That when the pain gets too bad, you're going to take off. It's meet-me-halfway or the highway. Sorry. And let him know what that looks like — whether it's an agreement to talk about the issue at a particular time, weekly, while each tries their best not to be bitchy and recalcitrant, or something more formal, like counseling.

An "I love you" at week one is only acceptable if you're currently enrolled in preschool or are Drew Barrymore. That said, I have a number of friends in long-term relationships — some of them marriages — who got to the magic three words very, very early. You're not being weird, though. They're a small minority. Delivered too early, chocolate-covered adjectives and sugary texts can have all sorts of negative connotations attached: I love you (and I'm desperate). I love you (and I love random tail). I love you (and I don't know what a "boundary" is or how to honor one and that is why it's 2:00 a.m. and I'm crying and doing a shitty guitar serenade outside your door).

Does this mean you're a cold fish with commitment issues? That you only like guys who treat you badly and don't communicate? Pshaw. Unlike Vogue models, emotions and behaviors come in more than one size. When it comes to affection, what you have right now is an Extra Large. What you need is a Medium. You already know you don't want a Small (a.k.a., your ex-boyfriend). You don't have to judge yourself for what you want, because it's all subjective. Just ask yourself: Does this make me happy? If so, it's a go.