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Please Advise: Should I tell my roommate I once slept with her new boyfriend?
Nerve readers weigh in on one woman's sexual quandary.
Each week, the inbox of our venerable advice columnist, Miss Information, is flooded with queries. And although she makes a valiant effort, she cannot answer them all. To deal with the surplus, we've decided to turn to you. So, don your spectacles and help this woman out. You can give her advice in the comments below, or, if you'd like to share what you wrote with your friends, on our Facebook page.
I live with my best friend from college, and we get along really well. The problem: she started dating a random guy she met at a bar. But when she brought him home, it turned out he wasn't so random after all. I definitely had a one-night stand with him a few months prior to their meeting. When she first introduced us, we both played it off like we didn't know each other, but later spoke alone about it and decided not to tell her.
Then he started spending more and more time at the apartment. It's more than a little awkward for me; I feel like a liar and a bad friend. I thought it would be better not to say anything, because she seemed to really like him. (Plus she's a bit of a prude.) But now he's also turning out to be kind of a jerk. He leaves his stuff around and doesn't clean up after himself, which is annoying, but more importantly, he's rude to my friend, and she never stands up for herself. She's a really great girl, super easy-going and sweet to everyone, and she just shrugs off his attacks. It's hard to watch. And I feel guilty, because maybe telling her what had happened could have prevented all of this.
Now what? They're getting serious, and I'm stuck in this weird triangle. I want to get rid of him both for her sake and mine, but is there a way to do that without revealing the secret we've kept? That will certainly come down on me in the end, not him. I was just trying to give the two of them a chance, but I should've told her, right?
— Bad Friend in Poughkeepsie
Tell her what you think she should do in the comments below.