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July 28, 2011
Bonus: Maxim, on the art of Skype sex!
Each month, the good folks at Maxim take on a new technology — they're like the ITT Tech of new ways to masturbate. This month, it's video-chat sex. As usual, their primer is written by a "woman," who mostly writes about how much other sexy women just love chat-sex. And she could be right.
"'When I dropped the whole towel, I got suddenly turned on and starting touching myself.' And with that Ginny entered the wonderful world of video-chat sex." If it happened to Ginny, it could happen to you!
According to Miko Sinz, "a petite Irish Korean stunner," who works as a model for a $4/minute sex-chat service, a lot of couples have phone sex with her. "The women start out really timid, but halfway through, they get really into it... It's a turn-on knowing I'm getting them to mess around. When they just want to watch me, it's pretty hot, too." The takeaway here: porn stars are as sexually fulfilled as you are! And, like, totally surprised that a guy as handsome as you would be calling a phone sex line.
"Many millennials even believe in video-gasms as a kind of "safe" cheating." According to Marnie, twenty-three, "It was a way to fulfill physical attraction without exactly cheating... we used all kinds of vibrators, costumes... we were constantly trying to up the ante."
Maxim: training the next generation of Anthony Weiners. Or... tigers. See you in September, friends.
Commentarium (31 Comments)
Someday Maxim is going to have to admit that they get all their advice about women from watching porn movies as though they're documentaries. I genuinely expect they will someday print:"Remember guys, if she's not in the mood for sex, ask her if she wants pizza. If she says yes, cut a hole in the bottom and stick your penis through. When you present the pizza to her, tell her you got her extra sausage. Women love it when you're spontaneous, so it's guaranteed to work every time."
Also, the part in Cosmo about getting married after a year made me say "what the f**k" out loud. I only know one couple around my age that's married and they'd been dating for 5 years prior.
That pizza box idea actually sounds pretty awesome...
Step One: Cut a hole in the box...
Um, Cambridge is the Cambridge of South Western Ontario; it's right next to Guelph.
Like ^
Comment of the day. Thank you for helping me learn about the world.
Wait until I tell ya what the city beside it is called!
Your very own Waterloo?
Way to write an article about ignorant sex advice, only to pepper your commentary with ignorance about Canada!
As Nerve's official token Canadian, I pardon the confusion, and I think you should too (we have to keep up our facade of being peace-loving if we want to someday overtake these American swines).
Knot to worry, we're infiltrating the foul American swines from within by taking in their refugee Loyalists, intermarrying with the remainders, and insinuating ourselves into their comedy culture. If we have to, we'll send in the Canadian Forces a la Southpark: The Movie.
I don't know what they are talking aboot
Go back into your hoose, you boor!
The University of Guelph has done a study on something other than agricultural science?! Neat. They're moving on up in the world of southern Ontario post-secondary acedemia!
I can see how you'd think the tiger thing is some link to the "inherent" female feline nature, but I think it's a play on the whole Tiger mom thing. You know, scary Asian women/mothers. Which makes it vaguely racist. As if you need more reasons to love Cosmo.
I'd rather step in it at Guelph than sleep with it at Western.
Why is tongue sucking gross? Aren't you a little old to be using "gross" this way?
You're right about the wax though - somebody ought to litigate that one. Really bad advice.
I guess it depends on how you give bjs! I wouldn't want anyone to suck my tongue in the same way they suck my dick
I wouldn't want anyone to suck my tongue the way I suck dick either, yo.
good lord, every month with these i picture some poor chick earnestly licking the crap out of her boyfriend's jaw, biting his mouth hard and probing the roof of his mouth. this, girlie, is why he doesn't want to marry you--you are the worst lover ever.
jill
http://inbedwithmarriedwomen.blogspot.com
kfb8pb Excellent! Got a real pleasure!!!
The material is on the five plus. But there is a minus! My internet speed 56kb/sek. The page was loading for about 40 seconds...
Well, actually, a lot of what you write is not quite true ... well, okay, it does not matter:)))
Thanks for all the answers:) In fact, learned a lot of new information. Dut I just didn`t figure out what is what till the end...
Very amusing thoughts, well told, everything is in its place:)))
A unique note!!!
However, the author created a cool thing!!!
Unbelievable. Class!!!
I love how my fellow Canadians all noticed the Cambridge reference on an article as enticing as terrible sex tips.
As a side note my apartment building is called "the Cambridge"... Just sayin...
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Personally, when I want to go Tiger Style, I just listen to Wu Tang Clan.