Advice

Sex Advice From American Apparel Employees

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Q: What’s the best reason to date an American Apparel employee? A: We’re clean and have symmetrical faces.

Rosie, 20
http://rosiecherry.blogspot.com

What's the best way to hit on an American Apparel employee?
I will start by saying that asking to take private photographs is one of the worst ways to get a girl, because of the obvious creep factor. Also creepy is the method of asking a sales girl for help repeatedly just to talk to her. Although, a guy once asked my friend where the workout shorts were, and then asked her to model them for him, and they are still dating. For me, I’d like a guy to ask me about something he already wanted to buy and take my advice on a better option. Then we could go for coffee on my break.

What's the best reason to date an American Apparel employee?
As a rule, I feel like most American Apparel employees are pretty physically attractive. But the guys I’ve worked with at American Apparel who have attracted me did so because they had a lot going on outside of work. They only worked there to make rent while pursuing creative projects.

Do you wear American Apparel underwear when you're trying to get laid? Do people think it's cute?
I find that men tend to be turned off by the cuts of the underwear A.A. sells for women. They usually prefer to see the women in the men's styles that A.A. carries.

My girlfriend wants me to pose for some provocative pictures. Should I do it? I'm worried it might come back to haunt me.
Do it! Taking naked pictures is always fun, as long as you trust the person you're with. You have to just realize that most people have a soul and rarely do things to other people that they would never want done to them.

I met this guy on a gay dating website. I really care about him but it seems like he only wants to sleep with me. Should I indulge in the occasional booty-call, or would that mean I don't respect myself?
He probably does just want to sleep with you, but maybe also isn’t opposed to seeing you on a regular basis. Relax and have sex. The more you see each other, the better the chances are he'll start to really care about you.

I really like this guy in my office, but it's hard to find a way to approach him at work. Can I ask him out via email, or is that lame by definition?
Passing inter-office notes is the most fun, flirtatious, and direct form of acceptable office romance. I would even opt for the corny middle-school, check-box system: “Do you like me? Check yes, no, or maybe.”

I just got a girl's phone number and I'm nervous about asking her out. Should I call or text her?
Either is acceptable, but sometimes it’s easier to be witty or smart in writing. If you call, it's always hard to know what the situation is on the other end. I think text messages are always a safe bet.

I found my boyfriend in pictures with a bunch of other girls on a party photographer's website. Should I confront him about it, or play it cool?
Play it cool. Typically, women are more attracted to a guy who is radiating the confidence he gets from dating a great woman. Take it as a compliment; he's dating you for a reason.

James, 24

What's the best way to hit on an American Apparel employee?
We're much happier talking to you than folding shirts, so just smile, talk, and don't try too hard. You have to keep in mind that we're at work, and although our work is not terribly demanding we can't always stand around getting hit on, so don't be discouraged if we stop chatting and go do our job. Also, consider the location you choose. For example, the girls in Chelsea don't see a lot of straight men come in, so if you're straight, you'll have a leg up.

What's the best reason to date an American Apparel employee?
I don't know what it's like to date me, but I bet it's okay. The hottest thing is probably going Dutch on cab fare.

I've always wanted to have sex in a dressing room at a store. Any tips?
I feel obligated to discourage you from having sex in a fitting room, because it's someone's job to make sure you don't. If you got caught, they'd probably be so surprised and uncomfortable that they'd let it slide, but you'd be putting them in a vulnerable position regarding their continued employment. Anyway, the thrill of public sex comes from the spontaneity more than the anticipation, so why limit yourselves to a fitting room? Find an equally excitable partner, and you could get it in just about anywhere.

My girlfriend wants me to pose for some provocative pictures. Should I do it? I'm worried it might come back to haunt me.
You're not Rihanna. No one will know or care if there are naked pictures of you on the internet. Do it, and if you're really that worried, be extra nice when you break up with her.

I'm dating several girls right now, all pretty casually. Do I have to tell each other them about the others, or can I wait until we have "the talk?"
It depends on what you mean by dating. If you mean going on dates, you don't have to do anything and I would advise you not to. Some broad who you get dinner with sometimes doesn't need to know that you're dining with other broads. If you mean you're sleeping with all of them, you have to let everyone know. Cheating is bullshit, and so is banging a bunch of girls who don't know about each other. As long as there's no expectation of monogamy, you're in the clear, but condoms do not protect you or the girls from HPV and a bunch of other nasties, and you can give the girls cancer in their gynies. That's the worst.

I'm debating grooming options for fall. What do you think: full-bush, landing-strip, or Brazilian?
Make it the way you would most want to put your mouth on it.

My boyfriend tries to video chat with me while I'm at work. Is this normal or is he too needy?
I don't think one tendency will tell you whether or not a guy is too needy, but it sounds like you just don't want to video chat at work. That’s fine. Unless my girlfriend was at home with our baby (hypothetically), I wouldn't want to either. If you've video-chatted from work before, let him down easy. A guy's liable to get confused if there's a precedent.

I found my boyfriend in pictures with a bunch of other girls on a party photographer's website. Should I confront him about it, or play it cool?
Play it cool. I'm in photos with lots of women I haven't fucked. I'm even in a few photos with women I didn't try to fuck.

Michelle, 21
http://www.myspace.com/francesrosemusic

What's the best way to hit on an American Apparel employee?
Ask them where her where she got her outfit. Tell her you really like it. 

What's the best reason to date an American Apparel employee?
They're clean and have symmetrical faces.
 
Do you wear American Apparel underwear when you're trying to get laid?  Do people think it's cute?
Yes. I wear the boy briefs. I also leave them in piles around my apartment for dramatic effect.

I've always wanted to have sex in a dressing room at a store. Any tips?
Go to a store where the dressing rooms have doors instead of curtains. 

I'm debating grooming options for fall. What do you think: full-bush, landing-strip, or Brazilian? 
Meet me in the bushes, baby 

I really like this guy in my office, but it's hard to find a way to approach him at work. Can I ask him out via email, or is that lame by definition?
You should be direct. Video-chat him via Gmail.  

I just got a girl's phone number and I'm nervous about asking her out. Should I call or text her?
Call her, but refer to it as wanting to ring her. It sounds more charming and British.

I found my boyfriend in pictures with a bunch of other girls on a party photographer's website. Should I confront him about it, or play it cool?
Let him be glam. You don't need to worry unless he tagged himself by name.