Advice

Sex Advice From Bear “Double-Rainbow Guy” Vasquez

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The internet sensation on cage fighting, full moons, and keeping your beard from interfering with your sex life

Bear "Double-Rainbow Guy" Velasquez

What do you think about having sex outdoors? What would sex under a double rainbow be like?
I think it would be amazing! I’ve never done it, but I think it would be incredible. I probably could do it, because I find them a lot. I go to places with waterfalls and stuff — but I usually go alone. I hadn’t thought of it, but now that you bring it up, I think I’m going to try it. I could probably make that happen.

Yes, you need to have sex under a double rainbow and tell us what it’s like. 
Yeah, that’s a good idea. I think now that you put it into my head I’m actually going to do that. 

I’m twenty-seven and I’ve had sex with nine people. How many sex partners is too many?
I don’t think there’s a number. I mean, I think it’s just a feeling that you’re going to get. It goes by the feelings that you get from each person, and it’s the connection, so, you know, you can’t have a number. Numbers mean nothing.

I read that you use cage fighting as a way to exercise. Can you tell me a little bit about that? Do you still do that?
Yeah, I had a fight two days ago. I fought this 300-pound guy for a TV show. It’s a pretty intense thing; I’ve got this big bruise on my arm. I do it to lose weight, and it helps me work out my aggressions and it keeps me focused and centered. It’s a beautiful thing. People have the wrong idea about it, at least a lot of people do, but I say that it’s a way to love your fellow man —aggressively.

How did your fight go two days ago?
I did it because of the TV show, but it was really premature. I haven’t trained in over a year and I wouldn’t have done it at this point in my training, but the TV show was here. I did really well because I have a lot of skills and training and good technique, but I don’t have the gas in the tank. So once my conditioning went down, I was defenseless and basically he just got on top of me, and sat on me. There was nothing I could do so I was just out because I couldn’t breathe.

On your website you discuss energy from the autumnal equinox and the harvest moon. Are there any times of the year or times of the month that are better for romantic or sexual energy?
Yeah, for sure. The full moon, when it’s in conjunction with Venus, is an extremely romantic time. Like, a lot of times I notice when Venus is near the moon I experience a lot more sexual and romantic energy. That’s always been one of my favorite times to be romantic with a woman.

It’s easier for me to come when I’m a little stoned but my boyfriend doesn’t smoke. Is it okay for me to sneak off and get high before sex or does that make me a junky and dishonest?
It’s never okay to be dishonest or deceitful or to lie. That’s just not cool. 

I found a picture of my brother’s girlfriend on a dating site for lesbians. Should I tell him?
I don’t see why not. Why would you want to keep anything from your brother? I don’t believe in keeping secrets.

I’m super into guys with beards. My current boyfriend looks like a lumberjack. But I can barely stand it when he goes down on me. It tickles. Is there anyway he can minimize the burn?
Well, you know, I tie my beard up into braids, so, you know, maybe that’s one thing he can do. 

Braid the beard to minimize the burn?
Yeah.

I had a bad breakup a year ago and I can’t quite seem to get back into dating. How do I stop self-sabotaging and get over my fears?
If you had a bad breakup, do some self-reflection and, you know, read a book. Maybe seek some help and be alone for a while. I’ve done that, and it helped me reevaluate things and have some clarity. Then, after a while, get back into it. 

There is a girl that I really like but once we got in the sack the sex turned out to be awful. Is she a lost cause?
It might not always be her. Sometimes it’s you. Sometimes it’s just the chemistry. I would recommend that you try it a few times and have open and honest communication, but it’s not going to work if the chemistry’s not there. 

I’ve been on a few dates with this smart, funny, and really cute girl. Each time she’s ended up totally wasted. Last night we split two bottles of wine at dinner and then she picked up a six-pack on the way home. I don’t want to preach, but I’d also like for us to have breakfast in bed when she’s not nursing a hangover. How can I bring it up without coming across like an asshole?
Try to talk to her sometime when you’re not going out and drinking. I would set up some sort of a lunch date and have it not involve alcohol. Discuss with her the fact that you’d like to have some times when you’re not drinking and see if she’d be open to it. Ask her if she's going to want to drink all the time and and only want to have sex when she’s drunk. Two dates is not really enough to evaluate the whole situation, but I would think that’s a red flag and should be discussed —but not under the influence. 

I’m debating grooming options for fall. What do you think: full bush, landing strip, or Brazilian?
I like a full bush.

I saw that one coming.
I’m just a natural guy!