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Scott Townsend, 26
Strand Book Store, NYC
www.strandbooks.com

Which books do you recommend to improve someone’s game in the sack?
Anything by Charles Bukowski. Because you either realize, “Hey, I’ve really been a pig,” or you realize, “Hey, I’d really like to try being a pig.” Even something like Allen Ginsberg, regardless of your sexual preference, because of the fiery passion that goes into the writing. It’s like, “I want to do this with you and I don’t give a shit.”

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If you think your new girlfriend might have mixed feelings about your stash of porn magazines, do you keep them hidden?
Me, personally? No. I did date a girl who got mad at me for having a Maxim. I wouldn’t hide that. But I wouldn’t necessarily say, “Hey, what do you want to do tonight? Let’s drink some tea and watch porn.”

What books or magazines should you have around your house to show your sex appeal to visitors?
Some history or political books, so you look like you actually know what’s going on beyond what’s in the Us Weeklys laying around the bathroom.

My girlfriend and I only have sex once or twice a week. She thinks that’s enough, but I want more. Should I just be grateful for what I get?
Yeah, be grateful for what you get. Then maybe it would be okay that you have a porn stash, so you can fulfill your sexual drive and still get your intimacy. If she doesn’t come over one night, take a trip down Club lane. Nothing wrong with that.

What’s the secret to good head?
Concentration and delicacy.

Where is the best place for public sex where you live?
I once had sex underneath the stairs of an apartment on Fourth Street. That was pretty awesome. Also, the subways — I’ve always wanted to do that, but they’re never abandoned enough.

I feel like my partner and I have exhausted every possible option for new positions. Any ideas?
Once I was with this girl, and she was basically doing a handstand and I was standing on top, and it was the most amazing thing either of us had ever done up to that point or since. Or pick up something like the Kama Sutra. And if that doesn’t work out, just laugh about it and go to bed. Have some ice cream.

Lori Rozycki, 48
Between the Covers, Telluride, Colorado
www.between-the-covers.com

Can working at a bookstore get me laid?
Who doesn’t want to date a bookseller? We climb ladders in skirts, and remain slightly aloof.

Sometimes when I’m out with friends, I flirt and don’t bring up the fact that I have a girlfriend. I’ll let it go as far as possible without cheating. Is this wrong?
Don’t be such a baby. What else is there to do when you’re out? Nothing wrong with catch-and-release.

I think my new girlfriend might have mixed feelings about my porn stash. How should I let her know about it?
Mix it in with the cookbooks. Then it seems more like a feminine understanding/connection of sorts. What girl doesn’t pick up a Playboy in a dude’s house and start looking at it? There are other magazines you could have that would frighten me a lot more, like Men’s Vogue or Details.

Should men wax?
Yes. And I think they should bleed once a month, and cry, too. And then they should have a baby.

An ex-girlfriend gave me two very different answers on two different occasions when I asked her how many people she had slept with before me. Should I press her on this, or is it her business?
If you are out of high school, there are other things to discuss. Instead, channel the question to your reading group by asking, “How many books have you read?” Let that be your marker of inadequacy instead.

What books or magazines should I have around my house to up my sex appeal to visitors?
No metaphysical or self-help. Martha Stewart is a deal breaker. You want to have a few casually stacked on the bedside table, like Metropolis — “I know so much about cool building shit!” — and Dave Eggers to show your too-smart, boyish, sensitive side. If not Eggers, Jonathan Safran Foer.

My girlfriend and I only have sex once or twice a week. She thinks that’s enough, but I want more. Should I be grateful for what I get?
No, you should get a new girlfriend. One who likes to read less in bed.

What’s the secret to good head?
I like to preface the act by saying, “You are so fucking lucky.”


Jeffrey Lewis, 38
Bluestockings, NYC
www.bluestockings.com

I’m dating a girl who likes it rough, but I feel weird being overly aggressive during sex. Is it normal for women to have what seems to me to be a rape fantasy?
I think it can be fine and healthy to play any sort of game, including rough sex. But really the question is, are you uncomfortable doing it? If you’re uncomfortable, don’t do it.

What books or magazines should you have around your house to up your sex appeal to visitors?
In terms of magazines, Butt and Girls Like Us. Butt is for homosexual men, but girls are really into it. As far as books go,The Almond, by Nedjma. It manages to be both a pretty amazing little story, and smutty at the same time.

My girlfriend and I only have sex once or twice a week. She thinks that’s enough, but I want more. Should I be grateful for what I get?
There ain’t no “shoulds.” Except maybe you should get into another relationship if you’re dissatisfied with the one you have.

If you think your new girlfriend might have mixed feelings about your porn stash, how should you let her know about them?
I think if people like porn, they shouldn’t be ashamed of it. I don’t know if keeping it on your kitchen table is the best idea, the same way you don’t walk around naked. But I think if you’re involved with someone, it’s a good idea to let them know what you’re into if you want to have a good relationship.

Which books do you recommend to help improve someone’s sexual life?
The Ethical Slut: a Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities by Dossie Easton.

Where is the best place for public sex in the city?
Brooklyn.


Brook K. Stephenson, 33
McNally Robinson Booksellers, NYC
www.mcnallyrobinson.com

I think my new girlfriend might have mixed feelings about my porn stash. How should I let her know about it?
You hide it right out in the open. Then sit her down, look through it with her: [flipping through a magazine] “Looks good, looks good. Maybe you’d like to try that?”

What books or magazines should you have around your house to up your sex appeal to visitors?
Purple magazine. Nylon Guys. Nylon for women.

My girlfriend and I only have sex once or twice a week. She thinks that’s enough, but I want more. Should I be grateful for what I get, or should I be getting more?
Once or twice a week — you should be getting more. If you’re getting it three or four times, ask for five or six. If you’re getting five or six, try for seven or eight. Or ask for nine or ten. “C’mon, baby, please.” You always gotta push for more.

What’s the secret to good head?
Tongue exercises.

What is your signature move?
Counter-clockwise, with a twist.

An ex-girlfriend gave me two very different answers on two different occasions when I asked her how many people she had slept with before me. Which one’s the real one?
Take her first answer and double it.
 

Interviews by David Callicott. Sex Advice From… appears on Thursdays. Have questions for the general public? Send them to sexadvicefrom@nerve.com.

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