Advice

Sex Advice from Etsy Vendors

Pin it

Sex Advice from Etsy Vendors - Jessica

Jessica, 24

VulvaLoveLovely.etsy.com

What has having your own Etsy shop taught you about sex and dating?
A. People get bored quickly, so add something new and cheeky into the mix and do it often. B. Admin doesn’t like it when you get on top, but sometimes you have to or nothing gets done. C. People say they like surprises but this is a lie — so if you have something planned or some disclaimer let them know about it or things could go sour.

What's the best reason to date an Etsy seller?
We’re good with our hands.

What's the best way to pick up an Etsy seller?
Tell them you’d love to help them set up or break down at a show and nothing gets you going like last-minute runs to the post office. It will be a done deal.

How can I use my Etsy shop to impress my crush?
I’m not sure; what type of shop is it? Personally I just flash my Vulvas and they are pretty impressed one way or another.

My girlfriend and I just moved in together. I really love her, but cohabitating has basically meant that all our time together is spent battling it out over boring household stuff. I want to keep dating; can you move out and not break up?
People don’t like surprises and fine print. Don’t outright ask her to move out, instead tell her what you’re feeling and see how she reacts. Go from there. Maybe she’s feeling the same, maybe she hates your Star Wars collectibles and the way you clean the kitchen. I don’t know and neither do you, so ask her. That said, sharing a space is never easy; it took me and my fiancé two years to figure it out. We’ve been together for seven. Growing pains happen.

When I'm single, I indulge in the occasional one-night stand. Recently however, I've begun to think that I’m "an easy lay," and it makes guys uninterested in dating me. Do I need to stop having casual sex in order to find a relationship?
Not if it makes you happy and you aren’t having stupid sex with someone you don’t know well. If you’re confident then be confident in your sexuality and the choices you make concerning your body. You don’t need and you probably don’t want to have any kind of relationship with a guy shallow enough to discredit you for that. It would be a complete waste of your time, and you have bigger fish to fry.

I kissed this girl at a party and it was fun, but I was a little drunk. I've always wanted to explore my bisexual side, but I'm worried about leading her on. Should I just let it be or should I write her an email explaining the situation and see how she reacts?
I vote you let her know it. Explain the situation and see what she has to say about it. If she’s bisexual or gay she’s probably been in the same place as you have and I doubt she would be offended. Who knows? Maybe she’ll have some amazingly helpful advice for you to top it all off.

The girl I'm dating is a smoker. I can't stand it and want to ask her to quit. What's the best way to broach the subject?
I’m not good at broaching subjects; I just blurt things out. But my fiancé asked me to quit by saying that it was really important for him that I am with him as long as possible. He said he was being greedy and he was okay with admitting it. He wants me to live as long as I can so he can cuddle me for as long as possible. It was smooth, sweet, made me cry in a good way and I stopped smoking. It was a double win. If you love her, give that one a go.

Whenever we're left alone together, my best friend's boyfriend starts hitting on me. I'm really appalled and want to tell him to drop this loser, but I'm afraid he might end up dropping me instead. What should I do?
What a charmer. If it always happens, plan on it happening again. The iPhone has a handy voice recorder on it, have it ready. When you have proof, not just your word, tell your best friend about it making sure he knows that the only reason you’re telling him is because you don’t want him to get hurt. If he doesn’t get it, he’s not really your best friend: he’s a douche and he and his boyfriend are a perfect match.

Sex Advice from Etsy Vendors - LourdesLourdes, 27

LourdesoftheFlies.etsy.com

What has having your own Etsy shop taught you about sex and dating?
It hasn't taught me much about dating, but has taught me a lot about sex. Specifically, about breasts and how different people from different ages and genders from all around the world see them.

What's the best reason to date an Etsy seller?
It's always endearing to meet someone who creates, rather than someone who sits back, consumes, and destroys.

What's the best way to pick up an Etsy seller?
Buy lots and lots of stuff from their Etsy shop!

I kissed this girl at a party and it was fun, but I was a little drunk. I've always wanted to explore my bisexual side, but I'm worried about leading her on. Should I just let it be or should I write her an email explaining the situation and see how she reacts?
Explain the situation! No one likes being left in the dark.

I just found out the girl I'm seeing has a five-year old. It's the kid's kindergarten graduation this weekend and I've been invited to come. I really like this girl, but I'm scared shitless. Can I politely decline?
You could politely decline, but why would you postpone the inevitable? If you like this girl, you will have to meet her kid at some point. If you decline, you should say, "I'm scared shitless your kid won’t like me, I can't go. I have no balls."

I’m in a monogamous relationship with a great guy. Everything was going fine until I ran into my extremely hot ex who made it more than clear to me he wants into my pants. I suddenly remembered the amazing sex we used to have. My boyfriend is heading out of town. How can I fight the urge to cheat?
Just remind yourself that he's not worth it if you really do love your boyfriend. And remember: you will feel really bad and dirty for a long time. Showers will not clean you of the smell of your ex-boyfriend’s dirty love.

The girl I'm dating is a smoker. I can't stand it and want to ask her to quit. What's the best way to broach the subject?
Tell her that you don't like it, but you understand she wants to do it. Ask her to please do it away from you, and give her mints or offer her body spray when she smells. Adjust to each other or move on. Don't expect anyone to change for you.

Whenever we're left alone together, my best friend's boyfriend starts hitting on me. I'm really appalled and want to tell him to drop this loser, but I'm afraid he might end up dropping me instead. What should I do?
Tell him, and if he drops you, you can say "I told you so" when he comes back after his boyfriend cheats on him with someone else.

Sex Advice from Etsy Vendors - AmberAmber, 25

HelloAmber.etsy.com

What's the best reason to date an Etsy seller?
We’re fun, creative and confident. We’re good with our hands.

What's the best way to pick up an Etsy seller?
Buy their stuff. Talk it up. Be nice. Don’t be afraid to get crafty.

How can I use my Etsy shop to impress my crush?
Talk up your crafts and show ‘em your site. Regular folk love to be around people who they presume are internet-famous.

I really liked a guy, until I saw his Etsy shop; it's full of junk. Is this a dealbreaker?
As the saying goes, one person’s junk is another person’s treasure. Perhaps you’re the one with bad taste? Either way, it’s no big deal. I’ve dated people who played in bands I didn’t like, but I rarely let that bother me. If you still like the guy, go for it.

When I'm single, I indulge in the occasional one-night stand. Recently however, I've begun to worry that I’m "an easy lay," and it makes guys uninterested in dating me. Do I need to stop having casual sex in order to find a relationship?
If the sex is good, keep doing it. If it’s not, find a new hobby. That said, if a person is going to judge you based on your sexual history, I’d question whether or not they are worth dating in the first place.

I kissed this girl at a party and it was fun, but I was a little drunk. I've always wanted to explore my bisexual side, but I'm worried about leading her on. Should I just let it be or should I write her an email explaining the situation and see how she reacts?
Write her back and make plans together. If you still feel something, go for it. If not, talk to her about it. You’re not going to be able to explore your bisexual side by sitting at home alone wondering.

I’m in a monogamous relationship with a great guy. Everything was going fine until I ran into my extremely hot ex who made it more than clear to me he wants into my pants. I suddenly remembered the amazing sex we used to have. My boyfriend is heading out of town, how can I fight the urge to cheat?
Make extensive plans with platonic friends while your boyfriend is out of town and stick to ‘em. Don’t leave a window of free time open where you’ll be tempted to phone or text your ex. Maybe tell a close friend about your dilemma so that they can be your positive reinforcement. Remember that you and your ex broke up for a reason, and your current lover is (presumably) way more awesome. And if the sex with your current partner isn’t hot enough, it’s up to you to do something about it.

My little brother just came out to me and told me not to tell our parents. I want to respect his privacy, but I think our parents would be accepting of the fact that he's gay and don't really understand what the big deal is. I feel like if he doesn't tell them soon, I'm going to let it slip by accident. What should I do?
My sister and I are both queer, and when she had one of us alone, my mother used to question the other's sexuality. Our usual replies were, “I don’t know,” or “Ask her about it.” The best thing that you can do is respect his wishes (and his privacy) and let him come out whenever he’s comfortable. Maybe he wants to wait until he has a partner, maybe he wants to wait until he’s older, or maybe he just doesn’t want to answer your parents’ questions right now. If you feel your parents would be accepting, tell him that, but it’s not your job to inform your parents.