Jane, 60

What's the biggest difference between Jews and Gentiles in the dating world?
Arguing is a Jewish sport. It's part of our heritage. This can be very unsettling to people from cultures where one is not supposed to contradict. It looks as if we're angry or in a bad mood. Not necessarily so!

Do Jewish men and women make better lovers?
My cousin says, "The problem with Jewish men is that they had Jewish mothers." I say, Jewish men are great boyfriends if their Jewish mothers taught them to make their beds and respect women. Look for a guy who loves his mother — but not in an icky, slavish way.

My boyfriend is Jewish, I'm not, and I'm about to meet his parents for the first time. I know that Jewish parents often prefer their children not date "shiksas," non-Jewish girls. How can I still make a good impression and let them know I'm not a scary Gentile?
That old advice to be yourself is the best advice ever. Prejudice often comes from lack of contact. When the parents get to know you and see that you adore their son, they'll come to love you. Unless they're Hasidim, in which case, they'll consider their son dead and your troubles will be over.

My boyfriend really wants to have sex in a public place, but I'm nervous. What are the best places to have sex, and what do we do if we get caught?
Airplane toilets are ridiculous, but you get  to join the Mile High Club. And you won't get caught in a coat room in summer. As for getting caught, you do what every teenager and politician regularly does: brush yourself off and deny, deny, deny.

My boyfriend and I used to have a very hot sex life, but things have gotten stale in the four years we've been together. What are some ways we can reheat our sex life?
Go on vacation, without the phones and laptops and other distractions. Finding the next level of pleasure depends on who you are and how you interact. Candid talk works for some. Maybe you've stopped telling each other what you really like. Recreational drugs work for others; that'll help you shake free of inhibitions. Sure you've been together for a long time — that doesn't mean you don't have inhibitions.

There's this really cute guy at my synagogue and I want to ask him out, but I only see him at services. What's the best way to approach him without being sacrilegious?
There's nothing sacrilegious about coming up to him after services and saying, "Shabbat shalom." If things heat up, you can clink your glasses of grape juice and go for "l'chaim."

I'm interested in dating a Jewish man. Where's the best place to pick one up?
In person in the U.S.?  New York, Miami, Los Angeles, Philadelphia, Chicago, San Francisco, Boston — in that order. You could move to Israel. I'm a dismal matchmaker, but I could direct you to New York neighborhoods where you can hang out on the street corner and watch hordes of Jewish guys.