Does your job as an impersonator get you more male attention than the average blonde?
I’ve been doing this for twelve years now, and one of the things I've noticed about Miss Monroe is that she was very well loved, not just by men but by women also. Playing weak was the basis of her sex appeal. I don’t believe she was the most beautiful woman out there physically, but she was smart enough to play the weak, helpless type. "Oh, you're so much bigger and stronger than I am!"

Are you suggesting that men enjoy a weak woman? Is that what they really want?
I think it's a human thing. We like to think of ourselves as strong and providing, especially men. So a woman that is a little more submissive — not that she has to give up her strength as an independent woman — it’s an ego stroke. They like the compliments, they like to feel strong. If I said [in Marilyn voice] "Carly, you're just such a wonderful writer, will you help me with this paper?" You see what I mean? 

I almost fell for it.
I believe that Marilyn was quite smart. She was smart enough to play weak.

You think it was part of her persona, rather than her actual character?
I don’t think she ever let herself be who she truly was. She was very clever with not slipping. She was on-stage all the time.

Do gentlemen really prefer blondes?
You know, I have this discussion with my husband a lot, because I catch him looking at blondes quite a bit, and I’m a brunette. I think blonde hair is eye-catching — it glitters. Blondes get more looks because of the flashiness of the hair color. The stigma attached to blondes is not a good one, and Marilyn Monroe helped put that there because she played the dumb blonde, even though she was very smart.

What’s the sexiest thing a girl can wear to bed, besides Chanel Number 5?
Hmmm... I recently wore a black dress with stockings — the tip of the garter was peeking out and it drove the men wild. It’s those little sexy nuances that really get them: if you’re on a date and they can see something peeking, as simple as the lace on a bra, it’s sexier than putting it all out there. They’re thinking about it and thinking about it all night and then they throw you into bed.

I’m currently seeing a married man. People have been scorning me for my involvement, but it’s not as if I seduced him against his will. Who’s to blame in this situation?
Both are to blame, and if I can give any advice as a woman, it’s run. Run, run, run. That relationship will cause you grief and will not work out. I was dumb enough to date married men when I was younger and it never went well in the end. As much as you think you’re in love — run! If the man is really in love with you, he will follow.

I went on a couple of dates with a really great guy. But he’s middle-school clueless when it comes to sex. Is this a dealbreaker? What can I do to educate him?
That’s really hard. How do you tell someone they’re bad in bed? It is important, it really is. If it were me, honestly, I would run. But you know, she should weigh the realities: is this guy good to her? And then does she have the guts to approach him and say ‘“Everything is fabulous, and I don’t mean to insult you, but would you be willing to try to improve?” I couldn’t do it though.

It is a good indication of what’s to come. What would Marilyn do?
She probably would not go through with it. Unless it was somebody of great power, or somebody who could do something for her. Like Arthur Miller. Just by looking at him, I don’t think Arthur Miller was spectacular in that area, but he could do a lot for her.

Commentarium (13 Comments)

Nov 22 11 - 1:16am

I'm disappointed by the lack of drag queens.

Nov 22 11 - 10:19am

Me too.

Nov 22 11 - 1:33am

I'm disappointed by the lack of intelligence. Actually Laura was pretty okay but the others I was just like wtfamireading.

Nov 26 11 - 1:49am

Uhhhhh, yep.

Nov 28 11 - 11:06pm

Yep, thought the exact same thing, lolwut.

Nov 22 11 - 9:13am

Dreadful advice, from everyone except for Laura.

Nov 22 11 - 2:12pm

Dear bk and lolwut,
Stop taking life too seriously. I promise if you had a sence of humor you would have enjoyed this article.
With scorn and laughter,
Someone who is Smarter than you

Nov 22 11 - 12:38pm

My feeling here is that the first two were trying to remain in character and provide advice based on their interpretations of Marilyn Monroe while Laura provided advise as Laura. At least I hope that is what happened. Also, I don't think Marilyn was the woman these women think she was.

Nov 22 11 - 1:00pm
Saratoga Slim

I guess I'm not enough of a necrophiliac to get turned on by the idea of sex with a Marilyn Monroe .

Nov 22 11 - 7:28pm

Thing is, at first I took these comments at face value at first, and really thought of them as 'advice' before reminding myself that the woman they represent, although well loved, had terrible personal relationships which is the same problem I have anyway..

Nov 23 11 - 7:29pm

I liked Laura and her advice. She seemed like she really knew her stuff but wasn't obsessive about it.Her advice came from her and was the most logical

Nov 24 11 - 12:29am

Yay Laura!

Nov 24 11 - 10:48pm

I heard somewhere that for all her sexiness, Marilyn never had an orgasm. Poor dear.