Advice

Sex Advice From StarCraft Players

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Christoffer, 25

Species: Protoss 
 
What’s the best reason to date a StarCraft player? 
I can only speak for myself, but I think a lot of people have embraced their inner nerds and found themselves by playing. Being secure is very important when going into a relationship. I could go into jokes about multi-tasking and timing pushes, but I believe that it only would cement a negative stereotype. 
 
What has playing StarCraft taught you about dating? 
Personally, I haven't dated much since I started playing StarCraft II (no causality, honest!), and I never played StarCraft: Brood War seriously, so I guess I haven't learned much from StarCraft in particular.  
 
I’m a devout Terran, but I'm dating a Zerg. How can we minimize conflict within our relationship while still maintaining strong armies and a competitive rivalry in the game? 
A true Romeo and Juliet situation! I think you should nurture this rivalry, because I think it will bring spice to your relationship. Perhaps issue game-based challenges that will lead to real life rewards like not having to do the dishes or maybe the fulfillment of a dirty fantasy.
 
I’ve been considering asking a fellow player out. Is there a creative and acceptable way to do this while playing, or would I ruin my chances if I asked her out mid-game? 
Mid-game? Are you crazy? Mid-game is very crucial, and there simply is no time to be typing lovey-dovey stuff to the other player. Wait until after. 
 
I’ve been seeing this guy for a few months now and even though we’ve fooled around, we haven’t had sex yet. Neither of us are virgins, and he’s not afraid of sex, but I can tell he’s a little anxious. How can I get him to stop being such a prude? 
This may sound obvious, but why don't you take the next step? It helps if you tell him what you are going to do before doing it, so he has a chance to say no. "I am going to lead you into the bedroom, and then you are going to ravage me" was always a personal favorite. 
 
I’m worried that my girlfriend is faking it. She says she’s not and that the sex we have is great, but sometimes I’m not convinced. Is there a way I can go about asking her or finding out for sure, or should I just take her word for it? 
I think you should just take her word for it. There are a lot of physical signs of orgasm that you can look for, but not all women display all or any of them. If you need to bring it up, do so in a non-sexual situation, and tell her that you feel insecure about yourself. If you expose a vulnerability, then so might she. 
 
I’m looking to make things a little more interesting in the bedroom, though my boyfriend — who’s a little vanilla doesn’t seem to have any complaints. What can I do as a pleasant surprise that won’t freak him out? 
This depends wholly on what you mean by interesting. If it’s bondage play, get a silk scarf or something flimsy and ask him to tie one of your arms to the bed. Looking for a little pain? Tell him that you have been a bad girl, and need a bit of a spanking, or just tell him to slap your ass when you’re in the middle of the high-intensity parts of sex. 
 
What’s the best way to balance being an avid gamer and being in a relationship? 
Communication and boundaries are very important. It’s crucial that both partners have their own time while maintaining enough free time to enable together time. Make sure you nerd out as often as you can; if you need to schedule a certain time for gaming for a tournament or a World of Warcraft raid, do it. It’s no stranger than setting up a girls' night out or gym trips.

Jessica, 23

Species: Protoss

What’s the best reason to date a StarCraft player? 
We are independent not needy or overbearing. 

What has playing StarCraft taught you about dating? 
Always be humble and be open to improvement. If things don’t go well in StarCraft, you can make little adjustments to your build order for next time. You can also make adjustments mid-relationship if things don’t feel right.  
 
I’m a devout Terran, but I'm dating a Zerg. How can we minimize conflict within our relationship while still maintaining strong armies and a competitive rivalry in the game? 
Learn to defend the Zerg rush as soon as possible. You will seriously get pissed off if you keep losing to that build. Also, both of you should avoid cheese in general.

I’ve been considering asking a fellow player out. Is there a creative/acceptable way to do this while playing, or would I ruin my chances if I asked her out mid-game? 
Definitely wait until after the game. Compliment his skills and ask if he’d want to meet up to work on improving your APM (actions per minute). 
 
I’m worried that my girlfriend is faking it. She says she’s not and that the sex we have is great, but sometimes I’m not convinced. Is there a way I can go about asking her or finding out for sure, or should I just take her word for it? 
If she’s faking it, it’s her problem. She isn’t even giving you a chance to please her if she isn’t being honest with you in the bedroom.  
 
I let the big “I love you” slip to my girlfriend of a few months while we were having sex, to no response. I’m not sure if she was ignoring it or if she just didn't hear it. It’s been a few days now and neither of us have brought it up. Should I ask her about it? 
You definitely have to back away and let it slide.  Attack the “I love you” base once you’ve built up your forces more, and get some weapon and armor upgrades.  Try saying that you love her with different words that aren’t so scary, like “I think you’re an amazing person,” and see what she says.  
 
I’m looking to make things a little more interesting in the bedroom, though my boyfriend who’s a little vanilla doesn’t seem to have any complaints. What can I do as a pleasant surprise that won’t freak him out? 
Don’t surprise him. I’d ask him if he’d be down for doing whatever “interesting” thing you’re into.  
 
What’s the best way to balance being an avid gamer and being in a relationship?
Make time for the relationship and for gaming. If your significant other is interested, you can play some games together. Just make sure the two are balanced. If you need a night to play Xbox, just tell her, and follow up by making plans to do something with her the next night.

Israel, 26

Species: Terran 
 
What’s the best reason to date a StarCraft player? 
We're good at multitasking and seeing the big picture while also paying attention to individual details. Generally speaking, to succeed at the higher levels of the game, you have to have a modicum of intelligence and a good memory, so we won't be forgetting your birthday or special days. 

What’s the best way to pick up a StarCraft player? 
Show some interest in the game, even if you don't have any interest in playing. Attend a local tournament or hang out at a cyber cafe. I hope you like Koreans! 
 
What has playing StarCraft taught you about dating? 
Going all-in leaves you wide open for complete destruction if things don't work out, but playing defensive the whole time, you're sure to lose. 
 
I’ve been considering asking a fellow player out. Is there a creative and acceptable way to do this while playing, or would I ruin my chances if I asked her out mid-game? 
Make a custom map in the editor that spells out her initials and a heart, and put it in the center of the map. They'll see it when they scout at the beginning of the game. If you don't even know her initials yet, you should probably hold off on asking her out. 
 
Even after a fifty-hour work week, my boyfriend won’t stop thinking about his job. Even when we’re having sex, I can tell that sometimes his mind is elsewhere. How can I get him to put down his BlackBerry and just enjoy himself once and a while? 
Break the routine. Dress in sexy lingerie, and when he's on his BlackBerry, grab his hands, look into his eyes, kiss him, and slip the phone out of his hand. You should then give him a meaningful look, and start removing items of clothing as you walk to the bedroom. If he doesn't get the picture then, I'm afraid he's hopeless. 
 
I let the big “I love you” slip to my girlfriend of a few months while we were having sex, to no response. I’m not sure if she was ignoring it or if she just didn't hear it. It’s been a few days now and neither of us have brought it up. Should I ask her about it?
First of all, you should watch the Seinfeld episode "The Face Painter." Honestly, it's going to drive you crazy every time you have sex with her if you don't bring it up again, so if you love her, tell her again. A bit of awkwardness now is better than never knowing until you break up. 
 
I want to ask the girl I’ve been dating about trying some role-play, even though we’ve only slept together a handful of times. I get the sense that she might be into it, but I’m not totally sure yet. Is it too soon to ask, or should I just go for it? 
Don't just go for it. The next time you guys are a few cocktails deep, maybe it's time to have the "What's the craziest thing you've ever done in bed?" conversation. The drinks will ease both of your inhibitions a bit, and you should get a better sense of where she’s been, but more importantly, where she wants to go. If you do decide to throw all caution to the wind, you may want to start with some easy material before putting on your robe and wizard hat. 
 
What’s the best way to balance being an avid gamer and being in a relationship?
Involve your partner. Relationships are always more successful when you're involved in each other's interests. StarCraft might be a lot to handle for a gaming newbie, but I haven't met anyone who doesn't like Mario Kart or Tetris. Cooperative games are always good too; it's not fun getting fragged over and over in Halo.