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April 2, 2010
Rocket, 28
What has stripping taught you about dating?
Don't make snap judgments based on first impressions. I've really hit it off with someone after that initial awkward nervous phase wore off. In the strip club, the guy in the designer suit with the flashy rolex watch might be a total cheapskate. The guy in the camo hunting gear who is missing teeth might spend a small fortune on you.
I want to put on a little strip show for my boyfriend's birthday, but I'm nervous that I'll just end up looking ridiculous. What should I do to make sure it goes off without a hitch?
Choose slow music, and move deliberately. Wear an outfit that is easy to remove, but has lots of things to play with: zippers, buttons, ribbon ties, buckles. It builds anticipation. And make a lot of seductive eye contact!
Is a stripper pole in the bedroom worth the investment? Why or why not?
I don't think so. But a lap-dance chair is a great idea! Tip: Ikea makes great chairs and couches for this purpose. Somehow all of their stuff is at the perfect height for different positions.
I've got a fantasy about boning a cheerleader. What can I say to my normally vanilla girlfriend to convince her to dress up for me?
Make a trade for it! If she does this for you, ask her what you can do in return, even if it is something non-sexual. Fair is fair.
How do I tell my boyfriend he's bad in bed? I think he thinks the clitoris is just like, a spot on my body and not an actual organ you can feel. Where should I start?
Teach him with positive reinforcement. When he does something well, actually say "I like that, do it again." You could also try masturbating in front of each other. That way he can see how you touch yourself and follow your lead.
I got drunk and cheated on my girlfriend of three years. It was a one time thing, and I feel like an asshole. Do I tell her?
If you can keep a secret, don't tell. If you are going to be miserable and guilt-ridden she'll be able to tell something is up. In that case, go into the conversation expecting to get dumped, and just hope for the best.
Commentarium (73 Comments)
Wow, did Nerve raid Devil's Point or something?
this was great! love the actual sex advice and slightly raunchier tone of this piece. more strippers!
I'm sort of surprised by this whole "stripper pole in the bedroom" thing. Since when is that something that is even considered? Has anyone actually ever seen one? If so, doesn't it end up covered with dirty laundry and stuff?
I guess you couldn't find a male stripper. They are so rare and elusive.
interesting that both girls advocated not coming clean if you cheat.
also interesting: "(don’t forget the balls and taint!)"
Rocket rules, and thanks to her I'll look at Ikea with a whole new perspective.
Wow, some people really like the word "douchebag" huh? Very insightful!!
Hi! guy r u feel lonely,Is it weird that I am 23 and still a virgin?
I would like to invite you to join my circle of friends on
w/w/w-BlackWhiteDate-com . My username is "looking4love".
Give me your comments on my photos. I'm waiting 4 u.
Well, I live in Portland where these girls are from. I tend to not want to take love advice from what are rumored to be emotionally troubled girls with severe cocaine addictions. Rocket is a pretty girl, but I think handing out buttons with a picture of just your own face on them is about as un-sexy as it gets.
No, FS, I'z not lonly. I have mah cheezburger az mah best frend.
123456
Try this dating site www.BlackWhiteDate.com
Really Nice!! My username is "looking4love".
Give me your comments on my photos. I'm waiting 4 u.
Shaun! Buddy! So nice to hear from you. Those buttons were actually made for about ten girls in Portland who were promoting PDXBlackbook.com...not all of them had our photos on them. The site made them for us. This business is all about self-promotion, so that is what I do and I make no apology for it. I love how you buy into the "all strippers are emotionally troubled girls with severe coke addictions" stereotype. It really shows how ignorant you are.
Thanks to everyone (including Shaun) for the comments! It's fun to read the feedback. Also, thanks to nerve for contacting me :)
excellent advice all around--I'm impressed.
Down to business. First, I'd like to ponder why a stripper would know anything about sex. Honestly, unless I'm mistaken, it's your job to sell your body and not get laid. And on another stance, why would I take a salesman's opinion on anything? It's your job to sell your body. The hell would you know about commitment or love? If you've managed to learn anything, it's from your personal lives, not your "profession." You can leave yourself with whatever delusions that leave you comfortable, but to your "customers" that is what you are. An item. An object. And where does the idea that strippers do better in bed come from? Wouldn't I ask a harlot? Considering the job you ended up with, I'd argue that you know nothing at all.
Bill. You're an idiot. I'd venture to guess you don't treat women--in any profession--well at all. Furthermore, you're boring. And probably ugly.
And probably totally correct.
"If you have to convince your girlfriend to dress up for you, dump her."
What a crock of shit.
Strippers ARE better in bed because they are generally more adventurous, in my opinion. But then, they are also better to play video games, because they know how to talk trash. You know who really stinks in bed? Prudes.
Bill, what does commitment and love have to do with sex?
Strippers are better in bed BECAUSE they know how to sell themselves. Good sex has nothing to do with love or commitment. That's just silly.
first off some of the advice was good though some wasnt and for those who think good sex has nothing to do with love well youve never made love which in its own form is the best sex becuase the two care and show it they also want to please the partner and vice versa it more intense then just sex
Very impressed by the the 3 girls! gorgeous, sexy and smart
Bill, before writing your valuable opinion at least read the title of the column! "sex advice" why are you talking about love and commitment??? also it is evident that you haven't had sex with a stripper because they are superb in bed.
Your great Rocket!
I m a male stripper and I love my job
Heh... sex advice from strippers. Woot!
ggjh
Hi! guy r u feel lonely,Is it weird that I am 23 and still a virgin?
I would like to invite you to join my circle of friends on
___ www---BlackWhiteDate--com
Give me your comments on my photos. I'm waiting 4 u.
Good advice!
http://www.hoponbaby.com
Hey Nerve, you need to upgrade your spambot filters ... *sigh*.
"In your opinion"? So, not from your own experiences then. Well, my experiences have taught me that more alcohol and drugs do not make better sex, regardless of who you're with, particularly strippers and waitresses. It's just easier, that's all. If you're looking to get laid with no commitments, whores are a good choice. If you think a pretty face (under very low lighting) makes a good heart, or you're a lovesick puss, then stsy away from em. Believe me on that one.
I want Sex Advice From Strippers to become a regular column.
From an older woman's perspective, who was married for 24 years, I think this is all good advice. Specific advice was given on how to strip for one's man--slow, deliberate movements, slow song, clothing easy to remove, etc. Trading with your lover for a sexual favor is great advice, and one should always communicate what one does and does not like in bed in a positive way. Negativity will only make one's mate apprehensive and feeling not-so-sexy! In which case, neither party wins! Cheating? Once again, these columnists are correct in my opinion. Very few relationships make it when a partner cheats. If it truly was a 1 time mistake, it's best kept to yourself. And never let yourself be in that type of situation again. Do not judge these girls because they are strippers, drug addicts and lowlifes. Not all strippers are drug addicts. And, as stated above, not all men with Rolex watches tip well!
The last one seems very democratic.
Taint for the win. hahaha
Oh yes. I must've forgotten. Real sex is just plain humping. Because by that standard, that totally makes masturbation a legit form of sexual intercourse, doesn't it? Who needs another person at all? It's just quick pleasure and nothing more. You fools honestly know nothing of sex. If you remove the emotional aspect from sex, all you have is an empty husk that leaves you wanting something more. Why not just get a blow up doll? I used to wonder why other women were so dissatisfied with their partners. I also used to wonder why people needed advice on sex. You think it'd be easy to figure out. But, now I know. You people don't even know what sex is.
Sex is not elitist Bill.
your fukin hot lov 2 shuv my stik in there and for my b-day can u do somestripping for me plz thx lol wow !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bill and Kanto should get married and make many babies together
No Bill, YOU don't know what real good sex is
I think "Bill" may be a little jaded.
Well, for me this was great. I have VERY low self esteem so once I get over that, I am definitely going to try some of the things suggested. (Not the "pegging", but the other suggestions). I, for one, LOVE the fact that the dancers are sharing this advice, it is their job to be sexy so they tend to have good insight on how to be sexy. :P
Can I Fuck You Heather please
Lol @ angry people. Rocket, I love the colors! MUAH!
I found the article to be funny and insightful due to the actual opinions and language, therefor maybe something that can be regarded as practice, and not simply speculation. Also, to bring "Bill" up again, sex is what you make of it. You can have passionate sex with someone you share a deep emotional connection with, or you can just have a quick fuck. Sex itself is simply penetration, it's the mind set that really counts. If you want quick satisfaction, you'll get it. If you want something more, you can get it( though the feelings may not be shared, unfortunately). The only wrong way to view sex is by objectifying women as simply sexual playthings, and that shit's just not right.
Pretty good advice, but there were a couple of odd ones. If your girlfriend doesn't wanna bang you in a cheerleader uniform, just dump her. That's a little far, but basically everything else works well. Be careful about the cheating thing though. Yeah, you may lose her if you tell the truth, but you'll definitely lose her if she hears it from someone else.
"I don’t think it matters. Some people think sleeping with a guy too quickly will make him not respect you, but if he doesn’t respect you, it’s because he is a douchebag, not because you slept with him. If you want to fuck him, fuck him!"
WRONG! Men don't respect sluts, like the slut that said that.
I think women shouldn't have to get paid to have sex they should be able to have sex when they want to!!!!
Should I let my boyfriend go as deep as he wants, even though it really hurts.
at least i didn't have to buy a bottle of "champagne"
if you want to know how to pick up a stripper, don't ask a stripper. You CAN pick them up at work. some strippers can't handle the fact that they are human because they have to try and justify what they do to themselves so they pretend to be impervious to any human interaction (like they are a machine there to make money ad manipulate guys). But they get bored, tired, horny ad doubt themselves like every woman does in any situation. just pay attenion to their signals and give them what they want. it may be harder with some strippers because that is exactly what they do all night long. Others will be like any oter woman and feel tis person knows me. Any stripper that says you can't pick them up at work is either angry at the fact that she's a stripper and is trying to exert some unrealistic superiority over anyone who is a non-stripper (ie customers) or they are a lesbian. I have known and picked up strippers who are in relationships, swear they would never date a customer and sleep around as much as non strppers. in fact a lot of strippers in relationships are living a double-life and lying to their partners and friends outside the club. They have their stripper persona and their regular person persona and the stripper persona can do whatever she thinks se wants to do because its not really her. If you meet a stripper that doesn't lead this double life and likes to strip then just get to know her and break her down like any other woman you want to date. persistance and confidence in your approach is best.
@ teal: NO. unless you LIKE the pain. i hope that was a joke.
@ nyguy: whoa there, "break her down"?
definitely an entertaining column. much better than cosmo's 50 ways to please your man (put a donut on his dick and eat it off? waaat...really, cosmo?)
And this is why she is a stipper; reat sex advice, terrible relationship advice.
there's a balance between physical (genetic attractiveness level) , ability to mutually nurture (they really, really want you to feel good), and the ignored thing-- TIME -- quick everything is worshipped in quick-buck america. Your body needs time to believe this is a friend.
And doing the nasty, primitive stuff that makes your partner cum hard and feel content depends on them feeling safe.
i love it! especially the blowjob portion........don't forget the balls and the taint!!! hahahahah....
i wrote about something similiar on my blog...
http://sexandloveblog.com/
Rocket and Kat had some good advice, but Hezzy is just a sad example of a trashy no class hoe who doesn't realise how much of what she believes is completely sexist.
What a joy to find somonee else who thinks this way.
Well I'm a somewhat prudish woman, but I liked the advice from these women so much (especially Kat's) that I'm revising my opinion of strippers. Sex work isn't for me (either as a buyer or seller), but you ladies are clearly awesome. Way to represent.
eXDDjx Uh, well, explain me a please, I am not quite in the subject, how can it be???
you guys rock..
you should fuck her up!make her get pregnet hump her man make the right noises too!