‘The Bachelor’ Secrets Revealed in Courtney Robertson’s ‘I Didn’t Come Here to Make Friends’

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Model Courtney Robertson, the villain and winner of The Bachelor’s 16th season – remember floppy-haired Ben Flajnik? – comes out with her tell-all memoir today. I Didn’t Come Here to Make Friends chronicles her experience on The Bachelor, from start to finish, and even explores her relationship with men before the show (Entourage’s Adrian Grenier, Desperate Housewives’ Jesse Metcalfe, and Reese Witherspoon’s Jim Toth).

I was under the impression that Bachelor contestants are silenced by an intense confidentiality contract they sign before filming. But with this debut, Robertson reveals juicy, secret tidbits about the show that are sure to make the producers sweat. Here are some of the best:

Getting on the show is no easy feat.

Before filming even starts, in addition to grueling interview sessions, contestants have to take an extensive personality test, meet with the resident therapist, and get screened for STDs.

Sure, you get to travel around the world, but being on the show kind of seems like The Worst.

All fans know contestants are isolated during filming; they’re stripped of entertainment and contact with the outside world. But it gets worse. In addition to being trapped on the compound, they aren’t allowed to exercise unless given permission. During Robertson’s season, the girls would try to squeeze in what they called “Yard Time,” where they’d do laps around the driveway.

Robertson was the first, but probably not the last, to have sex in the ocean on camera.

Courtney and Ben did in fact do the deed during their notorious skinny-dip in the ocean. But only for 20 seconds and it was “just the tip,” she explains. The waves kept knocking them over, making it impossible.

They make up for it later in the fantasy suite, sans condom.

Producers don’t provide condoms for the overnight dates, but that hasn’t seemed to stop anyone. Show creator Mike Fleiss once said that the Bachelor has sex an average of three times per season. Bachelorettes also get in on the action. Robertson reveals that Ashley Herbert and Ben Flajnik were intimate in the fantasy suite right before she dumped him while he was down on one knee.

It’s not as glamorous as you might think.

The only time the girls do their own makeup is on the first night and during the finale. They’re only allowed to bring two suitcases and they all share one bathroom. But there is a lot of booze, which is why everyone is always drunk. Apparently Courtney’s season was the drunkest the producers had ever seen.

You think Juan Pablo was bad?

This read makes it seem like Flajnik is one of the lamest human beings on the planet. According to Robertson, he could never be alone, flat irons his hair and knows every line to Finding Nemo. His response to her sexts post-show was either #beepbeep or #beepboner. Cringe.

There is an internal Bachelor language.

On-camera confessionals are called ITMs, which stands for In The Moment (the girls would refer to them as TMIs). Happy Couple Weekends are the name of the secret meet ups winning couples have while living in hiding. The winner and the Bach even have to set up new emails after taping to avoid hackers.