Comedy

Dating Can Get Ugly

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Randall Skeffington

Site: PlentyOfBrains
Username: Randawg_69

About Me
I’ve been a zombie for a little over a year now.  Regardless of my decompositional state, I’m constantly striving for the best, whether I’m working focusing on my career, having fun, or pursuing body-part replacements. I like to think of myself as a fully actualized man-god, thanks largely to my four-part philosophy: strength fitness, sex power, dance aggression, and windsurfing. Oh, and I’m from North Jersey, which is sometimes a bigger dealbreaker than that whole “craving for your still-living flesh thing.”

I’m on the Site For
Whatever. I mean literally whatever. I’ve been involved with trolls, disembodied brains, my roommate Mark when he was temporarily transformed into a woman, the list goes on… but I guess the point is that I don’t have a lot of standards. Or any. Don’t let that stop you from messaging me, though.

Our First Date
Tequila. And then maybe some Chinese. Food, not people. I’ve been clean and sober for a while now. Though I’ve definitely been getting some wicked cravings lately. Come to think of it, maybe we should go out for some Chinese. All that MSG… mmm.

What You Might Not Know About Me
My dad fought in the Zombie-Human War, which makes for some really, really awkward family dinners. He’s mostly over it by now, though. I think.