Dating Advice From . . . Engineers by Steph Auteri Q. For optimal functionality, what should go into a first-date emergency kit? A. Fine wine, road flares, a snake-bite kit and Ghirardelli chocolates.
24. Cristiano Ronaldo
There are at least five legendary footballers named Ronaldo (plus one Ronaldão and a Ronaldinho). Only one, though, attracted international headlines for having group sex in a $4,000-a-night London hotel room: Cristiano Ronaldo, of Manchester United. The October 2005 incident — in which Ronaldo and his cousin attended to two young women on a "king-sized sleigh bed, painted in silver leaf" in a ritual known as "roasting" — resulted in assault charges, later determined to be bogus. Today, when not being photographed in his underwear, Ronaldo is the subject of tabloid rumors that he's having "sizzling" sex with British soap star Gemma Atkinson. Does the word "sizzling" imply roasting? Was roasting involved? What is it with these footballers and roasting? (See #17.) — Peter Smith
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23. Jack Johnson
The first black Heavyweight Champion of the World (1908-1915), Jack Johnson bedded untold numbers of white women, flaunting a major taboo of the era. Sex conquers all! When asked the secret to his staying power by a reporter who'd seen flocks of ladies going into and out of his room, Johnson reportedly said, "Eat jellied eels and think distant thoughts." (A list of Johnson's major conquests is available here.) — A. Calhoun
22. Chipper Jones
Conservative, clean-cut Braves third baseman Chipper Jones — or as he's known to Mets fans, "Laaaarrryyy" — was, with first wife Karin, the toast of Atlanta . . . until the late '90s, when he admitted to various affairs, and to fathering a child with a Hooters waitress. He's since remarried and remains beloved by Atlanta fans — and by Atlanta's enemies, who will be making Hooters jokes about him until the day he retires. — A. Calhoun
21. Roscoe Tanner
The golden boy of '70s tennis had a 153-mph serve, but off the court he relied on the assistance of a wingman, cruising singles bars and Playboy Clubs with his doubles partner, Arthur Ashe. He wrote about the resulting sexual buffet in his 2005 autobiography, Double Fault, including the time Ashe procured him a Playboy Bunny and planted her in the stands for a post-game rendevous: "I witnessed beautiful women gravitating toward [Ashe] like James Bond, and all I had to do was pick up the leftovers. I told myself I shouldn't be doing this — ending up in hotel rooms with beautiful women I had met earlier that evening. . . at tour stops in Chicago, Washington and Houston." Later years were not so hospitable: twice divorced ("I think he has a sex addiction," his second ex-wife helpfully told ESPN.com), he impregnated an escort in the mid-'90s and has spent time in jail on theft and child-support charges. — Michael Martin
20. Alberto Tomba
Who knows if Alberto Tomba was all talk, but it was certainly memorable talk. "Tomba la Bomba," who famously howled "I am a beast!" as he crossed the finish line in the 1987 Alpine Skiing World Cup (adding, "I am the new messiah of skiing!"), demonstrated similar humility with regards to the opposite sex. At the 1992 Winter Olympics in Albertville, France, he remarked, "I used to have a wild time with three women until 5 a.m., but I am getting older. In the Olympic Village here, I will live it up with five women, but only until 3 a.m." When asked in 1994 if he preferred Witt, Nancy Kerrigan, or Tonya Harding, he replied "All three, together." It's hard to say whether Tomba was putting his penis where his mouth was, but at least one report suggests he was actively trying. Former U.S. World Cup skier Eva Twardokens remembers running into Tomba in Japan, in 1989: "Walking back to the ski rooms. . . he was saying things like, 'Come back to my room, we'll have fun, it's no problem.'" Good times? Not really. "He was just joking and flirting, but it really kind of scared me." — PS
19. Kazuhito Tadano
Japanese pitcher Kazuhito Tadano was a rising star in his home country until it was revealed he had starred in a gay-porn movie, in which he wore a leash and was jerked off by another guy. Slutty! Shunned by Japanese teams, Tadano signed with the Cleveland Indians. While he rose in ranks during the season, Tadano was repeatedly put before the press to "apologize" and explain that he's totally not into dudes: "I'm not gay," he said. "It was a one-time incident that showed bad judgment and will never be repeated. I was young, playing baseball, and going to college and my teammates and I needed money." Everybody leave the poor guy alone! From the looks of the video (at left), he's suffered enough. — A. Chapman
, featuring curious yet marvelous infusions of cucumber and rose petal.
