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Ranked: The Men of Lost from Least to Most Sexy

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Every single character, ranked in terms of sexiness.

Since day one, we’ve debated the motivations and allegiances of the dozens of characters on Lost. We’ve also spent hours arguing over who’s the most attractive. So, before the show takes its final bow, we've decided to rank all the significant characters from unappealing to irresistible. (And make sure to come back tomorrow for the ladies.)

40. Leslie Arzt

This super anxious and annoying science teacher doesn't have a speck of sex appeal, but he was able to bring some laughs to the show during his brief role. Unfortunately, the laughs came mostly when he was handling TNT and blew himself up. Bittersweet, we suppose.

39. Tom Friendly

The bearish Other is penalized several points for the fake scraggly beard he wore in the early seasons. As it turned out, that beard was a hint: ladies, you're not his type.

38. Stuart Radzinsky

Where to start with this hostile blowhard?  The Riff Raff hairdo? The discount-bin plastic frames? The surly, entitled attitude? Radzinsky can't even pull off the cool black Dharma jumpsuit. No wonder he ends up blowing his brains out all over the Hatch.

37. Anthony Cooper

Quite possibly the largest asshole in the entire series. There's basically nothing nice we can say about this guy, except that our moms like him on Emergency! And that doesn't come close to making up for him getting Sawyer's parents killed and throwing a certain someone out of a window.

36. Benard Nadler

Any guy who's man enough for a no-nonsense broad like Rose is good by us, whether he's fixing teeth in the sideways universe or sporting a macho Bernard-of-the-Jungle beard in his island retirement hut. If only he wasn't such a crotechy old dope, we might actually think he was sexy.

35. Hugo "Hurley" Reyes

Ok, so Hurley spent a little time in a mental institution. And he's, uh, big-boned. But he's got a great personality, a sweet smile, and he's a millionaire in two parallel universes. And we really like him. But just as a friend.

34. Roger Linus

Alcoholic. Short tempered. Responsible for raising the anti-christ. This guy hardly has the characteristics of a sex icon, though he can rock a Dharma Work Man jumpsuit like nobody's business.

33. Phil

He's odd, scowling, and had the audacity to slap the lovely Juliet in order to get Sawyer to talk. His furrowed brow and prominent chin may appeal to some, but mostly he looks like he has some bodies under the floorboards.

32. Ethan Rom

We suppose that a girl could do worse than Ethan, if she goes for reserved, quiet (and more-than-somewhat creepy) types, and doesn't mind the occasional needle injection.

31. Lennon

The appropriately named John Lennon look-alike didn't last very long on the show, but his geeky charm created a nice contrast from the other macho guys around him. He's like the Temple's Daniel Farraday, giving nerds across the world a good name. He's also kind of mousy and has an enormous nose.

30. Dogen

Dogen is a dedicated family member, bilingual, and carries around a baseball, but he totally sucks at guarding ancient temples. Plus, he has a neck-beard.

29. Seth Norris

Although cute in a bumbling idiot kind of way, the pilot's boyish good looks only lasted a few short minutes before his bloodied corpse was hanging from a tree.

28. Benjamin Linus

If sexy = seductive, and seductive = convincing people to like you (like, say, buddying up to a guy you shot in the back and left for dead in a pit of skulls or starting a book club with a woman you essentially kidnapped), then you might say Ben Linus is the Barry White of the island. Of course, you'd be wrong.

27. Horace Goodspeed

He managed to run the Dharma Initiative while keeping his fun-loving, if not-exactly-sexy hippie vibe. Horace is a good guy to have at a party, but he also might let you and the rest of your community be gassed and killed.

26. Pierre Chang

Pierre, the enigmatic narrator in the old Dharma training videos, reminds us of our curmudgeonly old high school chem teacher – uptight and unpleasant. Although he did prove to be surprisingly commanding for a turtleneck-wearing-scientist when the island was on the verge of destruction.

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25. Edward Mars

He was constantly outwitted and beat up by Kate, which makes him one of the worst US Marshals ever. However, the guy knew how to work the tough cop look and survive with a hunk of plane shrapnel in his chest for days. We have to give him at least some bad ass points for that.

24. Goodwin Stanhope

He has the wholesome, builds-tree-houses-with-his-son look going on, though he also made time to cheat on his wife with Juliet and spy on the survivors of Flight 815. Goodwin was one of the more attractive Others – which is kind of like being the best house on a really ugly block.

23. Frank Lapidus

Sawyer said it best: He's the pilot who looks like he stepped off the set of a Burt Reynolds movie. We never learned much about him, but he had a way with timely sarcastic quips, and he could rock a half-buttoned shirt like nobody's business.

22. Miles Straume

Yeah, the "popular" kids may get all the attention, but as any emo/Goth/sarcastic parapsychologist could tell you (if only you'd listen!) the sexiest people are usually the death-obsessed misfits on the sidelines making snarky wisecracks under their breath (or so hope our inner teenagers).

21. Mikhail Bakunin

Eye injuries? Not sexy. Black pirate eyepatches? Very sexy – especially when they're accompanied by the sweet guttural murmurs of a guy with the good manners to slip away quietly after a quick one-night stand (or an illogical plot contrivance).

20. Charles Widmore

If power is sexy, Widmore deserves a place of honor on this list. Plus, if we didn't give him one, he'd just buy it, obtain it through intimidation, or send a team of mercenaries to kill us all.

19. Caesar

Although his role was short lived, Caesar still had the mysterious Middle Eastern allure working in his favor. He was like Diet Sayid: same great intrigue, half the sexiness.

18. Christian Shephard

A raging alcoholic? A cold and dismissive father? Yes and yes. But with an intoxicating voice and beautiful sitcom-dad looks, we still feel a bit of heat coming off of Jack's departed father.

17. Martin Keamy

He's got dreamy pale blue eyes, a buff physique, and a creepy psycho-killer personality. (Well, you can't have everything.) Good looks are one thing, but frankly, we'd be scared to run into him in real life.

16. Matthew Abbadon

Tall, dark, and alarmingly ectomorphic, Matthew Abbadon earns his spot on this list with his natty fashion sense and fierce intelligence.

15. John Locke

Simply one of the most complex characters on television right now, Locke is a man of fascination, faith, and intelligence. He is a man deserving of both sympathy and respect. If it wasn't for his somewhat sagging physique, he'd be higher on the list.

14. Man in Black

We think the nameless one pulls off the stubbly silver fox look pretty well, but the real key to his sexy success is versatility: he can look like anyone you want, as long as they're already dead. And if you have a thing for rampaging plumes of black smoke, well, he can do that, too.

13. Michael Dawson

While some may have questioned his parenting skills, Michael was a real lady-killer. (Ba-dum-dum.) But seriously: he may have made some bad decisions, but the depth of his devotion to his son was touching.

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12. Charlie Pace

The heroin addiction and blubbering obsession over Claire and her baby got old real quick, but the man is a grungy British rock star oozing plenty of hot-and-troubled drama. When he let himself drown to save the rest of the island, it was a sad, sad day.

11. Jacob

The epitome of cool and collected, Jacob holds the knowledge and secrets of the island behind those magnificent eyes. Of course, maybe if he would actually explain a few more of those secrets, we could give him a higher placement.

10. Paulo

Although one of the two most reviled characters in the history of the show, we can't deny the fact that the man is a Brazilian god. If only he wasn't used for some lame throwaway episode, Paulo's soccer-player looks could have been used for good.

9. Boone Carlyle

He looks like your run-of-the-mill douchebag who is secretly in love with his sister, but Boone proved to be rather rugged when he sacrificed himself to ensure the safety of the rest of the island by refusing to let Jack chop off his leg. Plus, he's played by a male model.

8. Richard Alpert

The island's answer to Dick Clark has kept his youthful good looks for more than a century. His secret? Guyliner.

7. Mr. Eko

Another example of the strong, silent type, Eko has a soulful streak and a violent past. Not a man you'd want to tussle with, Eko walks softly and carries a big stick (and we're being literal there).

6. Jin Kwon

Desmond and Penny? Charlie and Claire? Jate and Skate? Feh! The Kwons were (are?) Lost's hands-down sweetest, sexiest (and, ultimately, most heart-breaking) star-crossed lovers, with Jin as the strong, mostly silent half of a married couple who made good on the promise "'Til death do us part."

5. Daniel Faraday

Sure, he's a little twitchy and geeky, but smart is sexy, right? And if you're smart enough invented time travel, that has to make you ultra-sexy. And brains aside, not just anyone can pull off the skinny-tie look on a tropical island.

4. Jack Shephard

What is there to say? He's rugged. He's handsome. He's a doctor. He's a rapidly evolving character throughout the series, going from the suicidal pits of despair, to heroically saving his fellow castaways. There isn't much he can't do, and there's not much we don't want to see him do either.

3. Sayid Jarrah

Ruthless, quiet, severe, and somehow undeniably charming. Sayid takes the tall, dark, and handsome type to a whole new level with his ability to be sensitive one episode and shoot a child the next.

2. James "Sawyer" Ford

Charismatic bad boy? Check. Charming southern gentleman? Check. Cynical wise-ass, die-hard romantic, con man, lawman, and himbo man-candy? Oh, hell, yeah: Sawyer was Lost's indispensible heartthrob, the type of all-purpose hunk who could make even sex in a stinky polar-bear cage seem pretty damn hot.

1. Desmond Hume

When we first met Desmond, he was a crazy, drunken Scotsman who lived down in a hole. Granted, some find that sort of guy sexy, but he really blossomed into a romantic icon when we learned of his unwavering devotion to the love of his life, Penny. He's also a master of time, space, and dimension, which has got to count for something.

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