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The time has arrived for actor and patron saint of I’ll-try-anything-once Tom Hanks to debut his fiction in The New Yorker. Is it actually any good? You be the judge, princess fingernail:

“Travelling to the moon was way less complicated this year than it was back in 1969, as the four of us proved, not that anyone gives a whoop. You see, over cold beers on my patio, with the crescent moon a delicate princess fingernail low in the west, I told Steve Wong that if he threw, say, a hammer with enough muscle, said tool would make a five-hundred-thousand-mile figure eight, sail around that very moon, and return to Earth like a boomerang, and wasn’t that fascinating?”

Remember ten years ago when you were still battling your mom over your decision to get plugs to stretch your ears? Now the backlash begins. Reportedly, surgeries to fix “flesh tunnels” in ears are in high demand.

The Washington Post explains how the possibly outdated tradition of tipped waitresses encourages sexual harassment.

These are the true stories behind some of the most exceptionally beautiful colors in art.

For some, Apple’s Siri has added a touch of humanity to their tech. For one child with autism, however, Siri has become his best friend:

Gus: “You’re a really nice computer.”
Siri: “It’s nice to be appreciated.”
Gus: “You are always asking if you can help me. Is there anything you want?”
Siri: “Thank you, but I have very few wants.”
Gus: “O.K.! Well, good night!”
Siri: “Ah, it’s 5:06 p.m.”
Gus: “Oh sorry, I mean, goodbye.”
Siri: “See you later!”

People are looking at your LinkedIn profile and they’re laughing at you.

If your Halloween festivities seem altogether historically ungrounded, here’s a list of witch museums and suspected haunted places to visit around the world.