11 Unusual Gifts for the Person You're Sleeping WIth
Lost in Sofa
Lindsay Cutler, writer
Let's face it: You live in a pile of garbage. Why not live in a pile of utilitarian garbage? This sofa design from Japanese studio Daisuke Motogi will make your clutter look deliberate, chic. Right now it’s only a prototype, but I’m hoping to God some manufacturer picks up this crazy design which — in all fairness — only appeals to people with lofty ideas and not a ton of common sense. Fair. (Would you really keep your coffee wedged in between cushions? Would you?) But the second this baby comes out, I’m making all of my friends pool resources for what will likely be the priciest concept sofa you’ve seen in a Brooklyn sublet.
Commentarium (36 Comments)
Seriously? A pet rat? No. Just no.
1) Giving people pets as Christmas gifts is monumentally stupid. Do you have any clue how many animals are brought to shelters (and, in many cases, put to sleep) because some well-intentioned but idiotic person decided that a puppy or a bunny rabbit or a rat would be an interesting an original gift.
2) Rats require vet care, just like any other animal. And owning a rat can get quite expensive, given that they are very much prone to tumors. So either you're advocating that people give a live animal as a present and then ignore its medical needs, or you're basically giving them a pet that they did not ask for that will require a financial commitment for them? Whatever.
3) A rat is a rodent, sure. But it's not a toy. It's a living goddamn creature. And oh my god, do not get me started on the whole line about rats not being "real pets." They are. And they require the same attention, care, and love that any other pet does. I honestly have no idea why you think that rats are toys, given that you loved your pet rat so very much. (And she probably died of some tumor that you never treated because it wasn't a "real pet" and therefore never required medical attention.)
4) Rat rescue organizations exist. Know why? Because moron writers think it's cute to give rats as presents and dump them off at shelters when they get sick of cleaning their cage. If you wanna get someone a pet rat, ASK THEM FIRST, and go through a rescue.
God, this writer is an idiot.
It'll be a cold day in Antarctica before I never get tea-bagged by a penguin in a top hat. And linda, calm down.
The rat idea is totally stupid, but I like most of the other stuff.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.... a rat could be pretty cool. I feel stupid for not understanding the Muslim thing?
I got a vision of riding through the city, becoming more and more frantic as strangers scream, "ANDREA! ANDREA! ANDREA!" Cars are honking, babies crying, and all you hear is strangers gleefully screaming your name since you are so lost for a place in the world that you need your bike to remind you who you are.
I think it's because Muslims don't celebrate Christmas. I think.
linda, while I agree with you about not giving pets as Christmas presents, i think this whole article was pretty tongue-in-cheek and the intention probably wasn't to direct everyone to BUY A PET RAT FOR YOUR FRIENDS FOR CHRISTMAS RIGHT NOW, SERIOUSLY!
In other words, relax and have a sense of humour for christ's sake.
I have a sense of humor, thanks.
But there's really no humor in that poorly-written blurb. At all. I mean, "Haha! I am getting my Muslim boyfriend who is scared of rats a rat for Christmas! Haha!" SO FUNNY I CAN BARELY CONTAIN MYSELF. Only not. And even less funny when you consider that people actually do things like that, because they think it's cute, and there are domesticated rats who end up homeless and euthanized in shelter every year due to negligence and idiocy like this. I work in a shelter, I know people who work in rat/small animal rescue who see, it's not a joke. It happens. Because of people like her who don't think rats are "real pets."
Maybe the author was being tongue-in-cheek. But, um, she's sort of bad at it? Meaning this whole humorous-writing thing and, uh, LIFE. She totally fails in both regards.
Linda, if I got you a fuzzy, stuffed animal rat for Christmas, would you accept it?
I LOVE that bike. You could also get something inspiring or ironic written on it.
ugh, you can always could on someone to turn the most trivial, tongue-in-cheek blurb into an opportunity to get bizarrely sanctimonious. I'm sure that writer who suggested a silly, theoretical gift idea TOTALLY FAILS AT LIFE
Linda, I was thinking of getting my friend a pet rat for christmas. Do you have any site recommendations about rat care I should be aware of? And if you could make it a sane, level-headed response about the real responsibility involved in caring for a rat, and the fun and joy it can bring into a life that would be great, because from what you've said all I get is that no person alive is capable of taking care of a rat and so they should just never be adopted as pets so that the cruel rat-mills finally go out of business. While I'm sure you've seen your share of rat neglect, I've seen plenty of happy rats in happy homes. Honestly, your sanctimonious attitude is getting in the way of what you're trying to say.
I like the Write a Bike
i ordered the whiskey aftershave. can't wait.
Weirdly enough I got the penguin tea timer for xmas last year...from my dad.
I am floored that rats develop tumors so often. Is that because they're tested on so often? Or are they tested on so often because they develop tumors so easily? Because, what if you're conducting all this research about tumors and rats and you're like, "grapefruit causes tumors!!" but really, the discarded rat that the Muslim boyfriend got for Christmas was just prone to tumors? I hope the Muslim boyfriend defies all our expectations and overcomes his fear of rats and gives his new pet the most awesome life ever. Happiest Christmas story ever.
And, seriously, this is a site where people routinely get into comment-arguments about whether women should get Brazilian waxes or not. I don't think trying to call a writer on an ill-advised, tongue-in-cheek blurb encouraging gifting pets to people because it's cute and hilarious is out of line. (Especially given that it does happen, and the rest of the article is a run-of-the-mill holiday product-pushing list.) I didn't say that no one is capable of caring for a rat. I just don't think it's fair, polite, or wise to give someone a pet that they'll have to care for for years to come... unless they specifically asked for it. And the stupid little blurb was full of flippant language that pissed me off: Rats aren't real pets! They don't require any effort! All I was saying is that, uh, THEY DO. And don't be the moron who gets your friend a pet rat they don't want and didn't ask for.
Oh, also, I know this is a terrible time to mention it, but we just had the exterminator come and take care of our rat problem. If only I had known! I could have saved oodles on Christmas gifts.
I'm going to back slowly out of this room...
wtf Linda, I wouldn't even get my dog cancer treatment, let alone a rat. Most people without health insurance can't even afford to treat themselves for tumors and you're saying if we want pets we need to be able to afford it?
Especially when putting them down is much cheaper and legal.
Holy crap, test tube spice rack! I feel like an idiot for not thinking of that myself. And that chair? Also awesome. I would love to be able to stick books and pens and stuff into my chair. Well, now I know what I want for Christmas! :)
I -do- keep my coffee in my couch. It snuggles nicely in between the cushions while I am sitting beside it. Works well for soda cans too. I've never had a spill.
@That rat is cute - Rats are tested on so often because they are small, inexpensive, easy to take care of, and not usually thought of as cute 'n' cuddly in the way that dogs and cats are. The predilection to tumors has nothing to do with it. Experiments performed on rats in labs would be unlikely to effect domestic rat bloodlines, as the rats are generally either kept in the lab or killed. As far as rats' predilection to tumors causing false research results, any decent research has a "control" group that will tell the researchers how often the rats develop tumors without having anything done to them.
S, all I said was that rats need vet care, just like any other animal. And therefore make bad presents because not everyone is prepared to deal with the expense of a pet, especially one they didn't even ask for and didn't take on voluntarily. And it's a fact that rats are predisposed to developing tumors, particularly female rats. Most of them are benign but can be removed. And, yeah, if you can't even afford to take care of yourself, don't have kids and don't get pets. It's pretty easy, really. Don't take on more responsibility than you can manage, and don't force extra responsibility on your friends just because you couldn't think of a decent gift to give them and thought you were too clever to just give them a damn gift card. THAT IS ALL I SAID.
However, I feel sorry for your dog. Don't get any more pets.
Cool. Thanks, Lisa. My friends who had rats loved them like children. Makes me feel bad about the rat-testing.
Linda: Like you, I am a total animal advocate, and I've worked in shelters as well. I absolutely support the fact that people shouldn't take on responsibilities in the way of pets that they cannot handle. However, your attitude is driving people away; readers will become less likely to learn from and sympathize with you because no one likes to be talked to like that. There are ways to be both constructive and polite. To be the voice of animals, you must also be the voice of reason.
I am absolutely amazed that people don't understand that this is a JOKE. Did you even stop to read the statements underneath the pictures? How can you believe that this person is being serious?
Especially Linda, the 'genius' that called the writer an 'idiot'- how low is YOUR IQ that the satire of this article was completely lost on you? You should be careful before criticizing the intelligence of others, since yours is obviously quite low.
Don't give someone a rat... bad idea. Even the rat received as a 16th birthday present isn't a happy story (not counting the death by dog). They aren't meant to live alone, everyone who knows anything will recommend you keep them in pairs at least. Don't give rats. Very, very outdated, poorly thought out advice.
Only a total douche would buy a rat for somebody without prior research into whether the receiver would appreciate it. And on that note, the "writer" claiming a rat is the "perfect gift" must have had part of her brain chewed up by a rat.
Dumbest article ever. Not funny in the least.
Linda, add me as a friend on facebook. You seem like a really really nice person. I love your holiday spirit!
part of why rats develop tumors is that domestic rats live for a few years, and in the wild rats rarely live more than 3 months. A predisposition to rapid growth and regeneration is great for a few months, but can manifest as tumors over time. As mentioned earlier, most of the tumors are benign.
It's all about the chair.
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I'll wager there's a Japanese version of that timer where someone gets an erection when your tea's done.
seriously, don't recommend pets as gifts. not even as a joke. that's just idiotic.