The Ten Sexiest Celebrity Stoners

Lose yourself in James Franco's bright, slightly glazed eyes.

James Franco

By Lindsay Cutler

Stoners and sex appeal don't usually go hand in hand. For every Peter Fonda/Johnny Depp-type, there are ten of your college boyfriends. And for every Helena Bonham Carter, there's the city of Portland. (Kidding, Portland.) But there's still reason to hold out hope that somewhere, someone is turning the cliché of the slovenly, disaffected stoner on its head. The following celebrities have different degrees of loyalty to bud: some have admitted using it, some have built careers around it, and some have very proud criminal records because of it. They're living proof that smoking pot does not necessarily mean you forget to shower (though if they did, we would forgive them). They are the ten dreamiest stoners who — whether they realize it or not — give toking up a sexy new face.

1) Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt is de rigueur for any list of hot people, whatever the further categorization, and to be honest, we're a little sick of it too. But look at him! Dreamy. And he's a recognized stoner, known to blaze up after a long day of shooting. He's also been spotted wearing several different pot-leaf t-shirts, which we will excuse, because have you seen him? His eyes sparkle.

2) Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Joseph Gordon-Levitt

In a recent interview with Details magazine, Levitt said, "When I was in high school, I loved smoking weed... I loved it. But I cut myself to once a month. That was my rule." Smoking pot once a month does not a pothead make, but we're inclined to give him a spot because most of his filmography makes you feel like you're in a weed-induced nightmare: Mysterious Skin was a pedo/space-alien nightmare, Brick was a neo-noir nightmare, and Inception was an M.C. Escher puzzle nightmare. (Levitt, however, is a dreamboat.)

3) Charlize Theron

Charlize Theron

Theron had that whole apple-bong incident a while back, and the evidence is all over the internet. Personally, we find nothing wrong with actress/beautiful person Charlize Theron smoking pot on her own time. And she went green with it, opting for the biodegradable apple bong as opposed to acrylic or Pyrex store-bought bongs. Good for you, Theron: environmentally conscious and high.

4) Sarah Silverman

Sarah Silverman

"Make it a treat," Silverman said to audiences at 2008 Comic-Con, urging them not to take the fun out of weed by smoking it every day. But we always figured Silverman was a daily smoker, as seen in her comedy concert doc Jesus is Magic, in The Sarah Silverman Program, and in that churlish grin of hers, usually a good indication of being really high and not talking about it.

5) Natalie Portman

Natalie Portman

"I didn't touch pot till I was in my twenties," Portman told Marie Claire in January. We appreciate her candor, but as with Bill Clinton, any connection with the alleged drug implicates you. The gamine beauty can downplay it, but smoking pot in your twenties is still smoking pot.

6) Kirsten Dunst

Kirsten Dunst

Invoking the classic dorm-room diatribe, Dunst told the Daily Mail in 2007, "I think America's view on weed is ridiculous. I mean — are you kidding me? If everyone smoked weed, the world would be a better place." In the past few years Dunst's film work has been slowly edging left of center, which either has nothing or everything to do with smoking pot.

7) Woody Harrelson

Woody Harrelson

It's one thing for a celebrity rattle off a one-line reference to smoking pot in a popular magazine, but it's another thing to plant cannabis seeds with the intention of getting arrested and then to spend four years in court battling possession laws tooth and nail. And, as uncomfortable as we are admitting this, we find him kind of sexy. Maybe it's the confidence that comes with a weed high and prior convictions.

8) Kimora Lee Simmons

Kimora Lee Simmons

Because we could never in good conscience list someone like Paris Hilton, we decided to go with the lovely Kimora Lee Simmons as the stand-in for celebrity decadence. Kimora, then-wife of Russell Simmons, was busted in 2004 for possessing a few grams of weed in her Mercedes-Benz. According to CNN, "Simmons didn't slow down or stop for police who had their lights and sirens on and used their public-announcement system to ask her to pull over." Lack of focus, detachment from one's surroundings, running away from the police and acting like you didn't see them — Simmons was high (and probably paranoid, too).

9) Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert

Who else do you know that can juggle hilarious in-character jokes with a carefully crafted persona, and do it on a (week)nightly basis? And how many of them are handsome? In a live speaking engagement in 2006 (and in San Francisco), Colbert mentioned that smoking weed in high school influenced his comedy. It's always funny to hear someone explain how drugs "inform their art," but if you've ever seen Colbert in Strangers with Candy, you know it's a pretty straight line.

10) James Franco

James Franco

We would be remiss if we didn't mention James Franco, the toast of young Hollywood, Columbia University, and guys everywhere who get high and imagine themselves as James Franco-types. Franco has been giving all-in-good-fun pot smoking a good name for the past few years. There was Pineapple Express (which actually ended with a pot-destruction tragedy), his stoner self-parody in Knocked Up, and his unintentionally hilarious weed-fueled road-trip short story in Esquire. This charming man now graces the Columbia MFA Writing Program, spending what we imagine are long nights of discussing the importance of fiction with the other grad students over a few skillfully blown glass bowls.

Commentarium (45 Comments)

Aug 11 10 - 1:04am
jmh

Watch between two ferns with charlize theron...she is high off her gourd during the interview

Aug 11 10 - 1:23am
Paris

Thank you, thank you Nerve,com! But if a recall in a recent New Yorker article, want there something about him not being a stoner?

Aug 11 10 - 2:37am
hma

You forgot to mention James Franco is going to Yale for his doctorate--only the best graduate English dept. in the nation!

Aug 11 10 - 7:18am
PixieStixk

Gotta agree with Dunst (despite her weird breasts). America needs to lighten up on the pot front. How about putting your efforts into lessening the impact of alcohol which is a lot more damaging?

Aug 11 10 - 8:56am
Rabble

Holy crap, jmh was not lying! She is out of her mind. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83I_rQUbw8c

Aug 11 10 - 9:58am
erica

Make that 11: Milla Jovovich

Aug 11 10 - 10:12am
Jeweler

What about Heath Ledger?

Aug 11 10 - 10:15am
top chef fan

not to mention padma lakshmi.

Aug 11 10 - 11:05am
ipot

Not sure that picture best captures Brad Pitt's hotness, but it definitely captures his stoniness.

Aug 11 10 - 11:50am
dfdfas

Not a fan of that JGL picture, he looks like Mac from its always sunny in that one.

Aug 11 10 - 12:26pm
manleyhopkins

Yo, JGL and James Franco look so much alike, it's crazy.

Aug 11 10 - 1:19pm
CK

@Paris is right; Franco doesn't smoke pot. Although he does play a good one in Pineapple Express.

Aug 11 10 - 3:17pm
karen

Wait, so is Steven Colbert sexier than James Franco according to this?

Aug 11 10 - 9:23pm
kj

Franco may be smart and sexy, but Colbert had his own presidential campaign. How many politicians do you know who can get away with being a stoner?

Aug 12 10 - 12:29am
Name Here

What's weird about her breasts???

Aug 12 10 - 12:45am
kph

Matthew McConaughey?

Aug 12 10 - 2:19am
laly

james franco isn't in knocked up

Aug 12 10 - 9:07am
Sdf

No mark ruffalo? Brad Pitt over mark ruffalo? What are you smoking?

Aug 12 10 - 9:26am
CB

@laly Technically Franco was in Knocked Up's viral marketing campaign (he was 'fired' from the set for being an egomaniac). But yeah, Franco wasn't baked in the scene... I think Nerve definitely has to step up their fact-checking.

Aug 12 10 - 9:44am
emily darwin

james franco wasn't in knocked up.

Aug 12 10 - 11:29am
JH

James Franco was in Knocked Up. Katherine Heigel interviews him on the set of her E! job...she keeps interrupting the interview to throw up.

Aug 12 10 - 11:39am
Ray Rahman

If I remember correctly, James Franco is actually the first person to suggest that Heigel's morning-sick character is "knocked up." So, yeah, it's kind of a no-brainer.

Aug 12 10 - 12:09pm
fishbowl

There was a several page article in rolling stones about Seth Rogen and James Franco where Rogen openly admitted to being a pothead and loving weed, yet James Franco stated that he, himself, was not a pothead and had rarely (if ever) smoked weed.
I do not have a link but a quick google search should get some answeres.
Good job sucking at getting facts.

Aug 12 10 - 1:25pm
noodles

Yo, fishbowl, as LC coyly states in the intro (you know, the first thing yr supposed to read?), the standards she'd set for the piece are pretty low. This often happens when someone writes something... they get to make the rules.

Aug 12 10 - 1:51pm
Daniel

Yeah, step up their fact checking to show me what is weird with Kirsten Dunst's breasts. The people need answers because I think they look great.

Aug 12 10 - 5:04pm
Ferberzz

Cute pot heads just give me the butterfly giggles.. James Franco and Stephen Colbert are the most attractive to me!

Aug 12 10 - 11:39pm
bearman33

James Franco isn't even James Franco anymore. I wonder what Baudrillard would say about this.

Aug 13 10 - 3:59am
Izenia

what happened to Seth Rogen

Aug 13 10 - 7:20am
Me

Where's Dave Matthews??? LOL!!!

Aug 13 10 - 9:17am
Matt

Wait, which Portland?

Aug 13 10 - 1:51pm
same sex

How could you leave out Keanu Reeves? Sexier than all of the males on your list combined, and if marijuana hasn't not influenced his acting at some point in his career, he's a great actor.

Aug 14 10 - 2:08pm
superchunk

all portlands, matt. all portlands.

Aug 15 10 - 7:20am
aaaaalex

Errr what about Jason Segel?
I mean...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pleNACHRadc

Aug 16 10 - 11:01am
Bobby Obvious

I think they should've mentioned James Franco back in the Freaks and Geeks era....

Aug 16 10 - 11:09am
musicjunkie

you left out Brandon Boyd!!!

Aug 17 10 - 5:52am
chjchj

I think they should've mentioned http://www.ukpandora.com/
James Franco back in the Freaks and Geeks era...

Aug 20 10 - 12:25am
fmdn

I agree that she has weird breasts. I have always thought that, but I can't really pinpoint what makes them weird. They just are.

Aug 21 10 - 1:43pm
lea

Pot heads turn me off...even though they are very attractive and successful they look dazed and confused and all I can picture looking at them is them veg-ing out on a couch eating twinkies and playing video games.

Aug 23 10 - 5:59am
Bea

Left out Hollywood's youngest, most obsessive-inducing toking couple- Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. Stewart has notorious TMZ pics out there, and Pattinson...well, just look at him.

Dec 08 10 - 9:48pm
melanie bertsch

kimora is a bitch i would never smoke with her not that I ever will but never ever someone like her. now i dont smoke anymore but i have a few drags here and there. i could smoke a whole joint through out the day and be just fine, but my husband doesnt like it and would rather sleep it off. yes pot makes you lazy and after it wares off you become very cranky and sleepy. its not a harmless drug. just cause its green and is a plant dosent mean its healthy.

Feb 08 11 - 11:05pm
Patch Janiyah

Hmm, nice. im out right now.

Feb 18 11 - 2:22pm
diamond

Wow and wow!

Apr 01 11 - 12:49am
Martha

u forgot kristen stewart ;)

Apr 12 11 - 8:51am
Masteradept

Sarah Silverman is not hot at all.

Apr 20 11 - 9:25am
kat

no snoop? wtf?