He's just a "young, friendly cub who can't wait to interact with the kids."
It was 10:02 pm in Washington and all eyes were on anchors Nicole Darin and Brian Mitchell of Comcast's SportsTalk Live, and their game-changing expose on disconcerting sports mascots. Then Ms. Darin introduced the Chicago Cubs new mascot Clark the Bear, "Described as a young friendly cub who can't wait to interact with the kids…" with a close-up shot of Clark with his cartoon cock and balls flashing on the screen behind her. This doctored image was the creation of a contest winner who submitted it to oft-raunchy sports site Deadspin. The masterpiece only saw the spotlight for a few glorious moments before the lame production team cut to a two-second looped video of a man dressed as a pelican. Whatever production assistant did this, please come forth. The nation wants to meet its next American hero.