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A Donut On The Penis Is The New Foreplay

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Gives a whole new meaning to "cream filling."

In contrast to some of their more batshit sex tips (e.g. "Tickle his feet with your nipples" and "Imagine you're pushing his penis into his body") the sexual brain trust at Cosmo suggest this tantalizing new foreplay move: "Slip a glazed doughnut around his penis and nibble it off."

One intrepid reporter took them up on this challenge and didn't hate it.  At first, she writes, the idea of it made her want to "cry and throw up on her boss" and then "quit and cry and throw up forever at home," but after a few nibbles she was sold concluding "It does make perfect sense… That hole. That glaze."

Of course it makes perfect sense! It is a combination of the two best things in the world: oral sex and pastry. The only thing that could make this better was if there was a ring of donuts that you had to eat away before you could get to someone's penis every time. Food foreplay has long been a thing and a personal fantasy of mine is eating a plate of bacon while getting it from behind. (When I tell people this, their reaction is generally the furthest thing from arousal, so I'm still searching for my Prince or Princess Charming on this one.)

If you'd like to to try this seductive move, just remember: don't put food inside any orifice besides your mouth or you might get a nasty infection. Besides that, go to pleasure town, my friends. 

[h/t Cosmo]

Image via benefitcosmetics