DISPATCHES

Reader Feedback on "Voicebox I: Women Writing About Writing About Sex"

Merkin--you're a joke and, at this moment, a fairly old joke. Old, kiddo. The image of your exposed "nates" is, to say the least, repulsive. You write in "Dreaming of Hitler" that men wrote you offering to supply the hand that spanks the baby. You replied, "...will they never learn...?" Who will never learn? You? I suspect so. Having read most of your writing, I have yet to get beyond the shallow, phony, phump of your rant. To be sure, it is a sophisticated, elegant rant--you are an eloquent--actually--more than an eloquent, writer. You have all the tools. But you have no soul. Your spanking story is as dry as a bone.
--rs
01/28

Does anyone know where I can find Daphne Merkin's 1996 New Yorker article "Spanking: A Romance" online? I see many allusions to it, but not the article itself.
--cw
03/02

This is THE BEST- I think you are "the Shit"-Betty-really I admire your liberal attitude -your honesty and your desire to do what you want-when you want-with whom you want- and if you want- Amen- of wait I can't say that i'm not a bit religious-how 'bout -Rock On Betty- lol
--has
01/21

Hi this is heart of www.NYClesbiansfun.com. I would like to know if you have uplifting, fun speakers for our events in NYC. Is betty dodson still making public speaking? thanks Heart4u311@aol.com
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10/27

I am a sixty-nine-year-old heterosexual male, Nancy [Friday], and I wish to tell you that I not only tremendously enjoyed most of your My Secret Garden book (some of the fantasies were distinct turn-offs, but that is only to be expected; if the shoe fits, etc.), I was also delighted to learn that there are at least a few females who also enjoy sexual fantasies. I guess one of my greatest frustrations has been not being able to find a female, at any time during my life, who is willing to have an intelligent conversation about sex. I'm not a geek; just an all too normal, well adjusted, reasonably presentable man who has not been able to discuss sex in any form, at any time, with any female. There is a lot to be said in support of the fascination of the unknown, but also much to be said about at least a minimal amount of good old-fashioned right-up-front communication. Please, Nancy, keep up the good work. I envy your man.
--PPP
05/12

How wonderful to read about Sallie Tisdale's experiences with strangers who feel they have the right to be sexual with her just because she has gone public!! Horrible that people will respond to a woman publicly in such intimately inappropriate ways, but fabulous that she shared this online. I used to think I had some kind of neon sign posted on my back that said "make sexual propositions to this woman unsolicited" (and this was while I wore military battle dress uniform for work each day). I used to think it was ME ME ME. Today I have learned that it isn't, and what a relief. . I have attended several "spiritual growth" groups as a separated and married woman, and I am AMAZED at the number of people who assume they have the freedom to fondle, touch and assault me because I am willing to be candid about sex and sexuality. . (To point out an extreme in my own experience, even an ex brother-in-law who thought my discussion of the way AIDS is spread so quickly through the hetero community in Africa was an invitation to three way sex without my consent while I slept. He says it wasn't rape because he stopped as soon as I awoke, pushed him off and said NO!!) . Thanks, Sallie, for sharing this online. I hate that it happens at all, but reading of your experience here at the Nerve VoiceBox seems to significantly lessen my self blame. . I enjoy my sex, my sexuality, and I enjoy being freely vocal about the most natural part of my being here on earth. I do not like the unwanted, unwelcome hands across my breasts, hard penises pushed into my back, or the lewd suggestions tossed my way as though my willingness to speak also indicated a willingness to close my eyes and fuck anything that moves. . Again, thanks. I shall remember this feeling of knowing "it isn't just me" for a long time to come.
--KLY
05/02

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