PERSONAL ESSAYS

Reader Feedback on "In the Realm of the Sansei"

Mr. Mura, There is a generation in America that do think of Asians as sexy and even more, but I am not sure if it from the sucess of the aforementioned actors or if it is something else. I for one have never thought of the Japanese as business men in suits or geeks. Your culture is beautiful and you should be proud I only wish I could learn everything about it in this live time. In closing I have really enjoyed your article. Thank you, Rachel Larson
--RL
08/14

Your article was thought-provoking and excellent. I learned a lot about Japanese films. "In the Realm of the Senses" sounds so shocking, I am glad that if I ever get a chance to see it, I know the ending. I appreciate your honesty. I know some people jumped on you, but I have no reason to. As a white female, I love Asian culture and find Asian men very sexually desirable. My first serious boyfriend was Vietnamese. I always thought I would end up marrying one, but my husband is from West Africa.
--LM
05/07

I am a Canadian male of Chinese heritage who was born and raised in Vancouver in a white neighbourhood. Your article brought back memories when I attended discussion groups with other oriental males on what it was to be oriental in white society. There were so many ideas, and there were no conclusions, just experience sharing and I suspect being oriental in white society is whatever you want it to be. I have only been with white women mainly because they were the only ones around. I'm with a women because of her personality and not her ethnic origin. I think they're with me because I interest them. Why I interest them may be difficult to answer. Could be because I'm new, or different or because I'm a nice guy. When I was in high school I was not popular, did not date and I was probably not sexually appealing. I was quite concerned. This all changed when I met a Quebec woman travelling through Vancouver. When we travelled to Quebec I got more attention from women there than I got in Vancouver. Bruce Lee was the most powerful and sexual Asian male image I had when I was a teen. I avoided many fights because of the ruboff respect I got from him. In Winnipeg, where I was a teaching assistant, I got so much sexual attention I was overwhelmed. I was involved with a native woman there, a first. Today I'm back in Vancouver and I've met Japanese women who are interesting sexually. To conclude, I can say if you're not getting sexual attention, say in high school, don't fret, it'll come. There is no one standard for what is sexual and what turns one on may not do it for another. The main sexual attractor for me is who the person is, how they carry themself and what I can contribute to that person. Trust and communication are a big part. There are so many people who are physically interesting, but lack the psychology or emotion to warrant a tryst. I do not question whether I'm sexually attractive - it is a non question. Just be, go out and play the game. Love, JYCC Van, BC
--JYCC
09/14

All told, this article confronted very little. From my point of view, Asian-American men have a huge angle on sex appeal, because I'm in subcultures that are attracted to japanese glamour: historic japanese dress, the toys and cartoons of japan, etc. I wasn't surprised at all when Star Wars' Queen Amidala used eastern glamour -- it has been hip for quite a while in nerd scenes. But then, in mass culture white is best, but in subcultures white is the least interesting. Japan probably has it the luckiest of all the asians on that count, in fact -- I feel sorrier for a random Vietnamese, although probably most people don't even know the difference. In the circles I travel, and I bet in a circle like Nerve, you'd find many people who are MORE annoying for the cheapness of their attraction to Asians, aka "yellow fever," than people ignorant about it. Most of the people I've found sexiest are Asians... Jackie Chan and Brigitte Lin Ching-Hsia are two that come to mind. Anyway, it sounds like you and your wife didn't very well escape from the stereotypes that drove your sexual anxiety---you said dating white chicks made you feel as good as whitey, and she said you were dangerous but not too dangerous. Not exactly the authorities on resisting race-attractiveness stereotypes.
--adn
08/05

I like your story and I can fully understand your questions about your own sexuality and what you might be in the eyes of women. I have to say that I find Asian men attractive, maybe nowadays taste has changed towards foreign people. For example black women can be very successful top models. I am a white girl and I live in Germany with an Italian man.
--GM
06/26

If Hollywood ruled the world, Asian men would be almost extinct and those left would be walking eunuchs. There are hardly any Asian men visible on the big screen especially sexy Asian men. And Jackie Chan is hardly re-sexualizing Asian men unless you think goofy Chinese guys with bad accents are sexy. The most recent Asian actors that appeared sexy are Russel Wong and the late Brandon Lee. Of course Russel Wong looks more Caucasian than Asian and Brandon Lee IS half-Caucasian. I am Asian and I have dated many white women. I always wondered why they wanted to date an Asian guy and how they could find me attractive. I know I was deeply influenced by the media and I chased after the white feminine beauty, which I had considered truly desirable. So why didn't they chase that hot White or Black guy portrayed so well on the big screen? I grew up not believing that I was good looking because I am not White or Black.
--sc
05/21

Hmph! You clearly haven't seen the films of Shintaro Katsu's brother, Wakayama Tomisaburo. In "Lone Wolf and Cub" or even in "Irezumi", or "Shinkai" or countless others, Wakayama-san creates a man who is strong, incredibly disciplined at his art, with great heart and a sense of humor and sadness. I think he was intensely sexy, and I'm an African/American woman!
--T
04/22

While I was glad to read David Mura's honest musings on a hugely undiscussed topic, I thought that, sadly, he was ultimately too meek on the matter. Asian male sexuality (in America) was in trouble the moment the first Chinese immigrant cooked his first chop suey for his white customer or washed his first pair of britches for a New World colonist. Our bodies, next to Anglo Saxon stock, do not carry the same muscle mass or fat content. As a rule, we do not make catcalls, or puff out our chests at every opportunity and we tend to favor lives of domesticity and geeky contemplation. Power, in this Western world, was (and still is) cut from a different cloth, and so too, the locus of sexuality. Examples of Asian male sexuality abound in the East, as it should: bawdiness, pornography, and other hallmarks of the male libido are everywhere in Asia, encompassing all sexualities, no less. I would, however, like to highlight a couple of forgotten examples (in addition to Mura's) of the sexual Asian male in the West: Tony Leung in Anaud's L'Amant and Bruce Lee, particularly in Return of the Dragon. Leung's performance, as well as the opportunity granted by Duras and Anaud, speaks for itself. Lee's oft-neglected work in Return of the Dragon, however, deserves much closer attention. There is a scene where Bruce, having just arrived FOB in Rome, sits in a piazza outside with Nora Miao, where she is lecturing him on the cultural differences between the Chinese and Italians. All the while, a beautiful Italian brunette sits down next to the two and begins making eyes at Bruce and smiles at him. The scene changes abruptly to Bruce climbing the stairs to Nora's apartment, where he is staying, and one of his friends from the restaurant where he is working emerges from within and asks him where he has been. There is an absurdly long pause as Bruce says nothing and smiles (post-coitally perhaps?) to the camera and the scene ends. Bruce laid the foundation, but who will build on his legacy?
--IC
04/11

Hi I just wonder if Mr. Mura is aware that there was three versions made called "In the Realm of the Senses". All three concentrated upon the geisha found wandering the streets clutching a bag with her lover's penis inside. All three approach the story from different viewpoints. Oshima's version focuses on the destructive powers of lust, and this is also parralleled in his next film, "the Empire of the Senses". The other one that I remember, concentrates upon the life of the geisha who searches for the love that was missing in her life. Despondant at the death of her last lover, she retains the penis so as not to again lose this love. The 3rd film again had a psychological bent to it, but I can't quite remember it's point. I'm surprised that Mr. Mura didn't mention the sexual charisma of Seiji Ozawa. He just vibrates with sexuality.
--hg
04/04

I grew up n Hawai'i. And it was always known that haole (white) students seemed to always date Asian or Polynesian school friends, and vice versa for local students. We wanted to meet new and interesting (and no doubt "exotic")students. Yeah, grandmothers were probably against all this (I mean I had one friend whose family from the main island of Japan did not want her dating Hokkaido students) and I thought BUT THEY'RE BOTH JAPANESE! My children are hapa-haole (half Asian). And demographically the fastest growing race in Hawai'i is hapa-haoles. How sad that on the mainland (where we now live) it is so very different. Hawai'i is more than an Island State, it is another world all together in very many important ways. Know that some of us have ALWAYS felt that Asian men were VERY VERY attractive! Aloha nui loa.
--ecs
04/02

A recent Newsweek reported that Asian men are the hot new cool thing, and now the white women want them. The following week's letters section was filled mostly with AsianAmerican men saying Why should my worth or coolness be determined by how many WHITE WOMEN want me? True. In reading this Nerve article's feedback, I see white (I assume) women saying Asian men are sexy because they're secret, powerful, lithe. (I'm guilty of saying all that too. I even once said it's sexy how good they are at math -- yikes!) That's like saying I like white women because they're statuesque and blonde and bold. I don't know how "secret" an AsianAmerican feels to himself or his family. And what if he's chubby? How does it feel, I wonder, to be sought after not for what you are, but for what you are not (ie., a big hairy white regular man)?
--lcc
04/02

i don't think that there has been that much progress in the way americans view asian males. jackie chan and those others don't really help either because they don't speak english. however i think that gay whit men find asian boys attractive. so if you're a gay asian boy then that's not a problem. for everyone else, there won't be that much progress in the next century.
--ay
03/31

Excellent article on a fascinating subject - several cuts above the usual crap on Nerve (but there is enough of this caliber that I keep reading :-) I plan on rereading it. However, I'd like to point out to Mr. Mura that Toshiro Mifune needs little explanation to American movie fans - he has to be the most famous crossover from Japanese cinema. I knew who he was from American movies even before I saw him in any of his Japanese films. (I guess Pat Morita doesn't count...)
--M
03/29

Additional comment: I guess the mystique of Asian men is American women's reaction to the annoyingly ubiquitous macho expectations of manhood that dominate this society. American masculinity is so over the top, out of control, and completely self-centered. Asian masculinity--kind of a modern gentleman's masculinity in this context--has a greater awareness of others, which is appealing to us white gals sick to death of being tuned out and left behind (socially and sexually) when we don't focus our entire attention on the exploits of the Rugged Individual Tough Guy made-in-America brand of man and alter our appearance to meet his expectations. ...no, I'm not bitter. ;)
--SB
03/28

Umm, I have no idea why, but I've always had a fascination with Asian men. Also Native American men.Dark-haired, dark-eyed, slender yet powerful, mysterious, holders of a secret power. I guess it takes a lot from images of Asian men in martial-arts films. The hidden power behind the face of respectability and the age behind the appearance of youth(you know, the slim, hairless body typical of Asian men)--the implication of sensitivity, passion, stoicism, and power together were very appealing to me. Unfortunately I fell in love with a tall, hairy, slightly pudgy white guy, but oh well. I'm glad I read this article. Tonight I'll fantasize about kung fu warriors and ronin. Good article.
--SB
03/28

Au contraire, my friend. There are some of us Caucasian women out there who find Asian men downright irresistable. Especially when they're articulate and dressed sharply. (pant pant)
--aew
03/28

I have fantasized about Asian men since I can remember. I have had only two Asian lovers,one chinese and the other vietnamese -french. And countless crushes. I liked how experimental both lovers were, how beautiful and free and absolutely sensual I felt when making love with them. "In the realm of the senses" was the first "Taboo" film I ever watched.
--GM
03/28

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