You had to have the last word. Delete the last line. Doing so gives credence to your fear.
--MG
04/28 |
my poetry is a shitload better than this.
--cbw
12/16 |
you suck ass and my friend Kenny would to see you in a hotel room with his wife butt naked so he can pound her ass all nite long while screaming, "what a good tea party"
Your #1 fan
slick pimp
--sp
12/09 |
wha? that's not poetry, its cut up prose. and ever heard of subtle metaphor? the title is appropriate, the author seems to be afraid of vaginas.
--mm
12/09 |
okay
--32
12/04 |
You kick ass, bro!
--SdD
11/27 |
oh, i forgot to say...raymond carver did a great job on saying important, complex things with very few words, leaving a lot to our imaginations..honestly, this poem is just a discount copy of him. and the metaphors are so obvious..like a horny dog...please..
--eva
11/27 |
last line was a bit anticlimactic, a bit flat. being minimalistic for the sake of it doesn´t automatically produce great poetry. and this is what makes the difference, in my eyes, between great art and just flat statements, this poem belonging to the latter category. in other words, just because it is short and sweet you still need to have something worthwhile to say.
so i realize there is a shortage of erotic poetry, but come again nerve. otherwise go for the back catalogue. john donne? ovid?
--eva
11/27 |
All the elements of a memorable wet dream
--RH
11/26 |
that's it nerve? That all the poetry in you?
--Ks
11/25 |
lovely piece
surreal, but vivid
--MGII
11/25 |
send feedback on "v. dentata"
back to "v. dentata" |
