theirs was not a serious relationship, guys.
they were together for about a month and a half and only on the basis of smoking pot together.
he still talks to his old, serious ex (they were together for 2 years) and i have zero problem with it.
also i go by the dan savage rule of snooping myself.
--S
06/22 |
agreed. only mature, secure individuals who have open communication with their partners in every aspect can still be in contact with exes. I, for one, dated my ex for 3.5 years and have been on and off roommates with him since we broke up 6 years ago ever since. We have both been in steady, serious relationships with our significant others for over 2 years and counting. No problem.
--kk
06/22 |
Anyone who tells me that I have to "cut ties" with my ex gets told to fuck off, right then and there. Your insecurity isn't my problem; if you can't trust me, you shouldn't be with me. Period.
--F.O.
06/22 |
Get some shut-eye, REM. SV's got it right. Staying in touch with exes is destructive to any new, healthy relationship for many reasons, including the one shared here. Cut ties and move on.
--FYI
06/21 |
SV, you're just dead wrong. I'm friends with a number of ex'es, and I'm proud of it: We've been able to keep something good about the relationship when the dating part didn't work out. I have no problem with the women I date being in touch with ex'es, either, as long as everyone respects the commitment the two of us have (and if they don't, then they get dismissed).
--REM
06/20 |
if S was snooping, the guy had obviously already damaged her self esteem. which is just one more big fat reason to send him packing immediately. in Germany we call someone like that a Vollarsch.
--mh
06/20 |
Can't help but contrast your response to S with the Dan Savage policy on snooping.
--LS
06/20 |
Anybody who keeps in touch with ex via any communication method should be banned from dating or having sex unless that person is ex-free! (ONLY exception can be people with kids BUT that should be kept to as minimum as humanly possible). I know that is harse BUT that is ONLY way to cut down on unnecessary shitcrap!
--SV
06/20 |
I don't think referring to the one time as "the best sex of my life" would be a good idea, as that's kind of like setting the bar, which can lead to performance anxiety as he tries to top it. It's OK to use "awesome" or "it made me breathless and feel all tingly inside at the same time" or other descriptive phrases. I'm sure some other aspects of the road trip contributed to it being the best sex of your life, too. If this pans out and he continues to be stellar in bed, it would be OK to refer to all the experiences combined as "some of the best sex of my life!"
--JCF
06/20 |
a) I agree with the previous comment. Dump his ass.
b) I don't think saying someone is "the best sex of your life" is a boner killer at all. I've always taken it as a compliment, and an indication to keep doing things the way you're doing them. It's not like introducing him to your parents on the third date or anything. It's just a compliment.
--MW
06/20 |
S can recover her self-esteem by dropping this guy immediately.
--
06/20 |
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