If you've ever wondered, "is this normal?," Esquire's survey may have an answer.
What is normal? It’s a difficult question. One possible answer is “a guy who reads Esquire.” But even a normal guy wonders if he’s normal. So Esquire took a poll of 1000 average American men to determine what, exactly, is normal in terms of numbers, which maybe sheds some light on attitudes. The answers are surprising, both in terms of what’s unexpectedly normal, and what normal-seeming things actually are normal. The survey covers a lot of topics, but let's just skip to the sex stuff, shall we?
1. 70 percent of guys have masturbated at home in the last month, which seems like a weird, low number. 9 percent of guys have never masturbated at home, which seems like a lie.
2. 6 percent of guys have masturbated at work in the past month. Hopefully there isn’t much overlap between them and the guys who never masturbate at home.
3. 45 percent of guys reported having sex once or twice a week on average. The next highest average was never, with 20 percent. Womp womp.
4. The most common number of positions during a session was two (37 percent). One position (20 percent) and three positions (19 percent) were neck-and-neck.
5. 46 percent of guys say their prostate is off-limits. 21 percent say, “maybe,” and 17 percent say “stick it in!” This only adds up to 84 percent, which makes me wonder what the other 16 percent said. Maybe “I’ve never thought about my butt in a sexual way.”
6. A majority of guys said that they prefer to alternate who’s in control with their partner, which feels like the most normal thing in the whole survey.
Of course, normal is relative. A majority of dudes don’t masturbate at work, but is it weird to rub one out in the bathroom real quick every now and then, really?
Image via Veer.