Everyone I've Ever Had Sex With: Female, 25, Arizona

"During the first half of our relationship, we were both insatiable..."

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Alex

When I moved for college, I shed eighteen years that everyone knew about. The freedom to start a whole new story was powerful, and it gave me the confidence to pursue the school's most sought-after guy, a typical surfer type from Hawaii. After a few nights of makeouts and handjobs on the bottom bunk of a dorm room, I lost my virginity to Alex on a futon outside our friends' apartment. We hooked up a few times after that, until he turned out to be a deadbeat stoner and dropped out.

Tanner

In retrospect, Tanner was one of the biggest assholes I've ever known and by no means was I physically attracted to him. We would stay up late into the night (I wasn't going to my classes anyway) and quietly grope around on the floor of his friends' apartment or in the back of my car. I don't think we ever got into a bed together.

Matt #1

Matt was in a band from California, which automatically made him desirable to my eighteen-year-old self. We began an intricate digital relationship via MySpace, AIM, texting, and eventually hours of phone calls. Over a long holiday weekend, my friend (also dating a Californian) and I decided to take a little road trip to the coast. At the end of a blissful stay, and two nights of forgettable sex, he became the first boy I said "I love you" to. Soon after, he cheated on me, and I proceeded to live through my first heartbreak.

Edward

Edward and I spent six years together. Our relationship was plagued by my overpowering fear of commitment and the illusion that there was always something better out there for me. That forced us to break up many times over those six years; mostly by habit, we were always drawn back to each other. During the first half of our relationship, we were both insatiable, some days never getting out of bed, tearing at each other's bodies. When we were broken up, I would satisfy my desire for the carefree world of being single and having the freedom to do what I wanted with whoever I wanted. The following encounters on the list all occurred during those times.

Guy on train

Yep. In the bathroom.

Devin

The only time I've ever been unfaithful in a relationship was with Devin. It was a huge mistake and most definitely not worth it. The decision was strongly influenced by my friend hooking up with his friend, leaving Devin and me alone, drunk at three in the morning with nothing much to do but have sex. It was terrible. I fell asleep while he was still on top of me.

Nathaniel

I quit my job, broke up with Edward (for the third time), and took some time to explore the world around me. I flew out to Tennessee and booked a couple nights in a hostel. The second night I was there, I was roped into a drinking game in the common area. I remember admiring Nate's great smile, sense of humor, and steady gaze. I do not, however, remember how I ended up in front of the toilet with Nate holding my hair back. Eventually I made it up the ladder to the top bunk in his room and then back down again in the morning, being careful not to wake up anyone else in his room. We hooked up again the next night before he checked out of the hostel. In my travel journal, I predicted that the memory of his amazing body was going to be fuel for solo play later.

Australian #1

Also during my stay at the Tennessee hostel. Drunk and horny. Drinking prevented him from keeping it up, so it didn't last very long.

Jeremy

Continuing my travels, I ended up at a hostel in New Orleans. While I was on Bourbon Street, a fellow traveller told me that because I was taller than most men (read: him) I wasn't a true and desirable woman. Instead of letting his misogynistic views get to me, I set out to prove him wrong. I ended up at a luxury condo with Jeremy, who claimed he was the road manager for Kings of Leon. The condo had an incredible stereo system, and a jet-stream bathtub that fit two.

Australian #2

Back at the New Orleans hostel, this Australian (different from before), mercilessly hit on me all night, only to end up getting scared we'd get caught shortly after we started having sex in one of the unoccupied rooms. He had amazingly soft lips.

Matt #2

Matt #2 and I had known each other through friends for a couple years. Matt was my first booty call and regular fuck buddy, until I decided I did in fact want to get back together with Edward. The sex was fun enough, and easy to come by, but he never really seemed that into it.

Edward, cont'd.

After spending six months apart, Edward and I decided to get back together. Our first kiss following that decision made my stomach hurt, in hindsight a very telling sign. My sex drive plummeted, which I blamed on the disconnect I felt with my own changing, growing, aging body. As true as that was, I also knew deep down that I just didn't really want to have sex with him. We spent the last three years of our relationship simply coexisting. We stumbled through our days together because it was the only way we knew how to live. Once we found ourselves estranged from all others and going in no particular direction, the restlessness set in and we went our separate ways. It was brutal, but necessary.

Travis

After I cut ties once and for all with Edward, it started to set in that I was a single twentysomething. I met Travis through friends and our relationship progressed extremely quickly from a mindblowing one-night stand that left me breathless to not being able to go a day without thinking about/talking to him. He soon told me that he had also been seeing another girl and was not ready to commit to being in a monogamous relationship. I'd become much too invested in him to get past the pain of jealousy, and I told him I couldn't continue on this way. A week later he changed his relationship status on Facebook from Single to In a Relationship. With the other girl. Guess he really was ready.

Want to catalog your sex life for Nerve? Send your complete list of bedpost notches, along with your age and location, to submissions@nerve.com. Don't worry — we won't print your name.

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