Love & Sex

Everyone I’ve Ever Had Sex With: Female, 26, San Francisco

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He has no idea he took my virginity at 17. He still doesn't know.

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Dave had liberty spikes, and played in a punk band that was popular in our shit hole town. He knew about anarchy, politics, and got me into the band Crass. I considered him my boyfriend, but he was older and I doubt he considered me as more then "someone he dated". He was still in love with his ex. I'll always consider him my first love for some reason and he has no idea he took my virginity at 17. We're still friends and he still doesn't know. He lives in Portland now with his crust punk girlfriend, and we try to hang out whenever his band plays in the Bay Area or whenever I'm in the Portland area.

I met Fabrizio while I was studying abroad in Florence. Our eyes locked across a crowded bar as a Beatles cover band played in the corner. To this day, he is one of the most attractive people I've ever seen. Six foot three with shoulder length shiny black curls and an olive complexion. We went on one date where we frustratingly tried to speak to each other in elementary French (the only language we both knew) and drank way too much wine.

I then went back to his apartment and watched him try to get it up for an hour. When he finally did, for long enough to get inside of me, he pulled out and I realized I'd started my period. He pointed at his dick and said "Either you virgin or you crazy!" I rolled my eyes and went to sleep and in the morning he rode me home on the handle bars of his bike. He stopped by my apartment after that and screamed my name from the street while I hid crouched down under the window. He didn't leave me alone until I ran into him again at that same bar and all my drunk friends yelled "I can't get it up" in Italian at him a bunch of times. He was very sweet and didn't deserve any of this.

After a night of drinking with friends, we ended up standing on a Florence street corner stuffing our faces with gyro wraps.  Ramone walked by with his friend pushing a bike. I thought he was cute and asked if I could ride his bike. He spoke decent English and responded with, "I don't know you, you could steal it." I responded by throwing my purse at him and grabbing his bike and riding down a dark side street while screaming, "For collateral!" over my shoulder. He ended up following me back to my friends apartment where we had sex on their fold out couch. We talked for most of the night and he seemed slightly broken-hearted by an ex and told me how different we were because I was a rich visitor and he had to work crazy hours as a waiter. When I said I was cold, he lit a candle and wrapped me in his sweater. He left at as the sun was coming up and when I asked if he wanted my number he said, "No, Florence is small. We'll see each other."  

Calvin Klein model
We met dancing at a Misshapes party at Luke and Leroy's in New York City. He was tall and hot, and had an insane amount of confidence. He fixated on me so intensely that I felt like I had no choice but to sleep with him.  He ended up fingering me on the cab ride back to his gay friend's apartment (as I sat between the two of them). We had sex in his friend's little sister's bed and he begged me to go to Philadelphia with him the next day. I remember not letting him do me from behind because I thought that meant anal sex. I was 19 and that's how sexually naive I was. 

I met Jed at a party my roommate was throwing in the basement of Lit in the Lower East Side. When I first saw him, I had this feeling that we had some sort of cosmic connection. Or maybe I was just wasted. He was cute, and goofy, and totally unhip. I remember him wearing cargo pants that unzipped under the knees. We danced forever and he was just silly and uninhibited.  He gave me his number and said he had to catch a ride back to Brooklyn with his friend. He came back five minutes later and said he'd rather stay with me and we ended up taking a cab back to his place together not long after.

I remember him unzipping the bottom of his cargo pants on the walk from the cab to his apartment door. He had Love and Other Difficulties by Rainer Maria Rilke on his bedroom floor and told me he bartended in Brooklyn somewhere. In the morning, his window was wide open and there were men doing construction outside. I sat on his bed completely naked and watched them for awhile and I could tell it bothered him. "Put a shirt on", he said. I gave him my numbered, kissed him on the cheek, and told him to call when I left. 

Mike was a good friend who had a crush on me forever. He wrote to me on Myspace and said he had to meet "the girl from California who looked like a hipster but had Discharge and Negative Approach listed under her favorite bands." He was cute and nervous, but liked me too much, so I wasn't interested and was a total bitch to him. As soon as he got sick of my games, I started crushing on him immediately, of course. I'd been partying too hard and decided to stop drinking and going out. I told him this and he immediately came over drunk with a beer in his hand and got me wasted. I don't think I'd showered in about a week and we ended up having horrible sex. Gross. We're still friends and I see him whenever I visit NYC. He's now covered in tattoos and has a super cute girlfriend.

Sean was a punk kid who was a few years younger than I was. He was very confident and sexual. I gave him a blowjob in the bathroom at a party the night I met him. We used to party and stay out all night and I would have to talk to his mom on the phone in the morning pretending to be his friends' mom and tell her that he stayed at my house and they'd had a sleepover. I was 19 and he was 17, with a very overprotective mom. We went on-and-off for a while, but it was never too serious.

Anthony and I were each other's first "real" boyfriend and girlfriend. I was 20 and he was 18 and we dated for 6 months. We would hold hands constantly and go to punk shows together. He was in a bunch of bands. He was sweet and insecure. I wasn't the best girlfriend to him, especially towards the end. We're still friends and I hope we always are.

I was on a date with someone else at a music festival in San Francisco. Justin was sitting with his friends drinking, and I could feel him staring at me as I walked by. "You're too pretty to be with that guy!  ou should come hang out with me!" he yelled as I walked by. I ignored him and thought he was an ass. I ran into him later that day when he was talking to a bunch of people I knew. He focused on me again and kept trying to get me to pet his dog. I ignored him again and still thought he was an ass. I ran into him a week later at a bar when I was drunk and decided I was going to sleep with him.