Lauren

For a year, I lived in Western Canada and wrote for a magazine. Lauren was the office manager. We got along immediately, laughing together in the frosty air and generally enjoying each other's company. She was sweet, laid-back, and beautiful, but not interested in the outside world, one of my prerequisites. I knew I would leave Calgary soon, and she did, too, so she ended things to avoid getting hurt. We're still friends and talk about getting together to rekindle our flame, but we never follow through. A great girl, and a great fuck.

Goga

I was twenty-six, and she was in her late thirties or early forties. A kind, divorced woman with a child, she was as uninterested in having a serious relationship with me as I was with her. She would come over, we would fuck, I would command her to tell me how much she loved my cock, and she would orgasm quickly. It ended when I left town, and that was a good thing, because I was getting disgusted with myself. I didn't want to touch a woman for months after. We're still on good terms, though. She just added me on LinkedIn.

Amanda

Amanda and I met on J-Date and had sex on the first or second date. Once I mentioned my handcuffs, she wanted to come over. I believe I fucked her four times in one evening, a record for me. We hooked up a few times after that, but neither of us really cared deeply. She cut it off for reasons she never explained to me.

Woman in Springfield

When I moved to Springfield, I was on a casual-encounters site. The only black chick I've been fortunate enough to get with came over for what I thought was a friendly visit, but she insisted on having sex. (Okay, it didn't take much insisting.) She liked being called a slut, and I liked calling her one. She told me it felt good when I fucked her, and it felt good when she was on her knees blowing me. I never called her again, which I regret, because as I write this list I realize I've been unfair to people. I've always prided myself on treating women well, but I can see that that's only been true with girls I've really cared for. The stories we tell ourselves in order to live!

Kristina

Kristina was the first Hispanic chick I'd dated. She liked me, but I didn't like her. I introduced her to D/S, and she loved it. Soon she was asking me to write dirty things on her body and take naked pictures of her; I generously obliged. I kept it going because she was soon departing for London, which gave me an easy out. We still stay in touch on Facebook.

FetLife woman

I've never been more disgusted with myself; my one-nighters and casual women declined significantly after this. We met one night after emailing on a fetish site called FetLife. She wanted me to force her to do things while she struggled — slap her around, take it in different positions, etc. She lived in New York, so there was no chance of us dating, thank Christ. Even in play, I find forcing women to do things horrible.

Girl I don't recall how I met

We went out to dinner, she came over and had sex with me. She was vapid, and I was rapid. Never happened again.

Marcy

Marcy was a pretty, intelligent early-thirties schoolteacher who, she told me, had never given a blowjob or been fucked from behind. She was into me, but I wasn't into her, so I ended things. She seemed bitter about it. I'm not sure why.

Rhianne

I met Rhianne on Fet, and it was the best kinky experience of my life. I got to try a lot of stuff we both wanted to — leashes, ball gags and the like. She started to like me, so I ended it. I'm not sure why I wasn't into it — she was hilarious and cute, with a killer body and smart things to say. But she took it well, thanking me for restoring her faith in men in casual relationships who would treat her nicely. I'm glad.

Adriana

I've never wanted to like a woman so badly. But there was just no chemistry, no matter how hard I tried. The sex was good; she was into trying new things and wanted to be fucked well and often. I ended things when I just knew I could never like her. We're still good friends, though. She rocks.

Alex

I had pathetically not been in a real relationship for eight years (!) until I started dating Alex, two months ago. We met online, and I felt instant chemistry. She's smart but not intense (I am, and I don't want to date another me), beautiful, ambitious, accomplished, funny, fun, warm, and kind. But she also has a history of abuse, has been attracted to assholes, has cheated in the past, and spends money more easily than I do. I can see myself falling in love with her and getting married. Who knows?

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