Love & Sex

German Men Voted The Worst Lovers In The World

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Just because Berlin is full of sex clubs doesn't mean they're having good sex. 

As a people, Germans are great at a lot of things. Making cars. Drinking beer. Having extremely punctual public transportation. Eating huge pieces of cake at 4 pm, which is a habit the rest of the world should adopt. But German men have recently been voted the world’s worst lovers in a poll of 15,000 women from 20 countries. The Germans, who were “too smelly,” narrowly edged out the English, who came in second place for being “too lazy.” 

Is there some kind of dire soap shortage in Germany? They must have a serious hygiene problem if 15,000 women from across the world agreed that they are so universally rank that it makes sex unbearable. The only other countries punished for physical attributes were Turkey and Russia, who came in at 7th and 10th place, respectively, for being too sweaty and too hairy. 

Americans were voted the fifth worst lovers for being “too rough,” which some people would argue is actually a good thing. Similarly, Holland was voted as “too dominating.” If getting handcuffed by a handsome blond in Amsterdam isn’t to your liking, the countries voted as the best lovers were Spain, Brazil, Italy, and France. And now we all know where to go on our next vacation. 

Image via Veer