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Quantify the effects of the experiment.
Aaron and I arrived at Real Dolls' San Marcos "facility" at one in the afternoon. We drove past the abandoned-looking premises a couple of times, certain I had the wrong address. After triple checking, we parked out front and walked up to the entrance. A young guy got up from the reception desk, opened the door and returned to his desk without a word.
"Hey," I said, cutting the leaden silence of the waiting room. "I'm Grant Stoddard from Nerve? I'm here to see Matt McMullen?"
"I'll be with you in a second," the receptionist drawled in a SoCal monotone, staring intently at the screen. He seemed both frustrated and determined. Aaron and I were motioned in the general direction of some pink leather sofas. We sat down. The reception wasn't the only thing that was chilly: the room was dim and freezing. It was ringed with silicon miniatures of naked women, each about sixteen inches tall. In the distance, the phone rang and a female voice answered. While Aaron loaded a roll of film, I listened in on the conversation.
"No, sir, there is a twelve- to sixteen-week waiting list . . . well, every doll is handcrafted, sir. . . well, you can pay a fee to expedite, but you can't jump to the top of the list . . . You can cut the wait time to eight weeks . . . that fee is an extra fifteen hundred dollars . . . you wanna go ahead and do that? . . . alrighty then, it's a Mastercard?" This was certainly a testament to the product. People were parting with twice my rent to get their grubby mitts on a fuckdoll a little sooner.
I asked the receptionist for the bathroom, and he pointed me down a long, dark corridor. Halfway there, I noticed a door was ajar and poked my head in. What I saw gave me a jolt. Dozens of Real Dolls were hanging from the walls by metal hooks in the back of their necks. They stared blankly at each other and at me, their mouths agape. It looked like a mass lynching at the Playboy Mansion.
I wandered around the room, mindful of the prominent "Do Not Touch" signage. This was my first face-to-face encounter with Real Dolls, and I was taken aback by how realistic they seemed. All the major races and pubic hair options were represented. I walked back to the reception area. We'd been waiting for about fifteen minutes when the guy at reception introduced himself as Matt McMullen, Real Dolls' founder and president. "Sorry about the wait," he sighed. "Computer issues." I was expecting him to be much older and said so. "Yeah, I get that a lot. Let me get you your date." He ushered us into a room containing a sofa, TV, coffee table and "Karen," who was coyly sitting on the sofa. Karen had a type 3 body, a type 2 face and a type-A personality.
"Here she is," Matt said, straightening her sheer blue dress, fussing with her hair and taking an admiring step back. "Go nuts. I'll be back in a half hour." He turned to leave, but I suddenly felt a little ridiculous and decided to stall. "Um, Matt? Can I ask you a few questions about the dolls first? I asked. "Sure," Matt said after checking his watch, fiddling with one of his face piercings and perching himself on the arm of the sofa.
Then I remembered where I'd seen Matt before. He bore a striking resemblance to the male Real Doll featured on the website. I asked him if the doll was created in his likeness. "Actually, a friend made the face for that doll," he explained. "The original version was a total replica of my face. I thought having this fabricated version of me was just too fucked up and made him change it."
"Well, it still looks like you a bit, don't you think?" I probed.
"Matt?" A woman's voice in the background.
"Okay, have fun, guys. If you want to change her position, come get me and I'll do it. Because if you damage her it's like . . . y'know?"
We did. Sort of. Aaron looked at me sheepishly. "Maybe you could leave me and the lady alone for five minutes?" I said. Relieved, he bolted from the room. Karen and I were alone at last. I touched her bare thigh and looked up at her for approval. Even though she was inanimate, I thought it terribly gauche to grab for the rude parts with no attempt at conversation.
A bit of background. During my time at Nerve, I've been sent many products intended to feel "just like real skin." Almost all of them don't, unless they're trying to replicate the mealy flesh of an Ebola sufferer. I got so many of these products, I almost came to expect prosthetic buttocks to be waiting on my desk every morning. The packaging usually said something like, "Molded from Chasey Laine's pussy and ass & feels just like the real thing!" As I scarfed down a bagel and coffee, I'd give the cheap toys a quick feel, then spend the next hour worrying about the state of the porn starlet's health.
Real Dolls are certainly more natural. The skin responds to a squeeze like a healthy nineteen-year-old Midwestern girl's might. The shocking difference — something I hadn't really anticipated — was that my date was stone cold to the touch. (Matt later told me that Real Doll owners put the dolls under electric blankets or in the tub to heat them up; apparently, silicone retains warmth.) Undeterred, I popped a boob out of her chiffon dress. This would be the true test of anatomic accuracy. I breathed on Karen's perky orbs like a grandmother cleaning her spectacles, attempting to take the chill off. I took one in each hand, and it felt good. Really good. I closed my eyes and tried to imagine I was feeling a real woman's C-cup boobs. Oddly enough, aside from the slightly tacky feel of the silicone, these boobs felt more natural than the fake sets that reside on real people. I was so zenned out that I didn't notice Aaron sneak back into the room. "Looks like you've made friends," he said, jolting me out of my daydream.
Think removing a real girl's clothes can be tricky? Karen was not only uncooperative but insanely heavy. I never really understood the term "dead weight" before. With Aaron's help, I eventually got her naked and positioned her head in my direction. Grabbing her hand, I shrieked. Karen's skeleton was discernable through her flesh, just like a real person's. Regaining my composure, I moved my hand between her legs.
I figured a Real Doll's vagina would probably take the brunt of the consumer's attention, and thus would be the key to its ultimate realness. Slowly, I slipped a finger in. The cavity was super-snug and, aside from being cold, certainly felt real. I squeezed out a dollop of Astroglide from the tube I'd brought along and applied it. Probably from friction alone, the area started to warm slightly. Now, I'm not going to lie to you. I got a little excited at the thought of having sex with it . . . I mean her.
Aaron left the room while I put on a condom and got between her legs. The initial pleasure of Karen's tightness was tempered by the feeling that I was humping a cadaver and was about to experience my first morgueasm. The sound of her wig rubbing against the back of the sofa was chilling.
Aaron, understandably reticent to be in the same room while I used the world's most luxurious masturbatory device, returned to take a few posed shots. "Um . . . what's it feel like?" he said, using his camera primarily to avoid making eye contact. I gave Karen a few hard pumps to illustrate. "Y'know what?" he said, taking shots as he backed toward the door. "You can tell me later."
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Commentarium (130 Comments)
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I think the implications behind them are demeaning to real people, they're even given names and reffered to as 'her' or 'him' rather than being recognised as the mere playthings they are.
And I hate the fact you say that the good thing about a doll is that they're always up for it, is that really the sort of thing you'd want in a person?
yes always
That has to be the creepiest piece Grant has ever done. It's about time he was put out of his comfort zone. Well done, Grant... that was definitely one I didn't see coming. As usual, great read, even if it gave me the heeby geebies. I think the next step is for someone to take a strapon to you. Now THAT would be doing it for science. Great, great job.
in the immortal words of phil 'the scooter' rizzuto, "HOLY COW"
Emran.kan
Grant, I love your writing...for me its the perfect mix of reporting, humor, and honesty. Keep up the good work!
Um. Is it me or has Grant's writing changed? It seemed with the previous IDIFS(popped some gal's cherry) and this, that he's got some long repressed machismo poppin out of his pants
You sure do have a sweet ass.
the pictures along with the writing are hilarious. love the idea of anyone hightailing it to orange county. too funny.
This was hilarious, and the pictures make it perfect. Woohoo, boy butt!
This is a timely piece, considering I just discovered the RealDoll site a few days ago and whipped out an academic essay on what the 'RealDoll' phenomenon means in terms of feminism. I really don't like holding people accountable for their sexual fantasies, as mine are generally just as freaky or more so, but come on-- shouldn't you point out that Abyss Creations markets the dolls as being so very
Thank you for making my day. Your antics with your plastic partner made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes. I appreciate your open mindedness and spirit for adventure to try things I may now consider a future possibility!
what SLS says is interesting, but i think s/he is missing something. nerve really could not do the kind of critique she suggests. besides, there's something to be said - a kind of worth of its own - for the slight irony both in the picture and the language. close enough, you know, and i think that's about as far as nerve can take it. there's no room for any real cultural critique that doesn't use humor, irony, or a kind of poking fun (sorry for that) at the writer himself.
I do scientific research for a living. After reading Grant's latest, I sent the following IM's to a colleague--
Brad: this is the funniest, most fucked-up thing I've read in the last couple of weeks
Brad: try to keep count of how many times you burst out laughing...
Brad: I think my count was 5
After seeing "Blade Runner" by Ridley Scott back in 1982 (set in LA around 2020) I could not imagine the idea of "replicants"--humanoids-being possible. But now I am convinced human clones and virtual humans will be here by 2020. I think this "sex doll" is a hoax but if not, then it is appalling to imagine how desperate some men are. Good God, for that amount of money I can have a great time with a young woman I can meet in a bar. Come to San Diego and see what I mean. Only a pathetic fat bore who wears sandals with socks and a lousy comb over would even consider a love doll!
I had no idea Grant was so cute! I propose "I did it for science: Random Internet Stranger"
Great, just great. This made me laugh out loud repeatedly, causing much consternation in the office and leading to me closing down all applications in case somebody thought I was looking at smut. I wasn't; this was far more fun. Good work.
great article
Grant, how come you weren't naked too?
Interesting article, and candid. The impression, however, is weird enough to question whether this isn't a good thing for males. If men are willing to hang a nude photo on a locker while in the military, and then fantasize about it, why not promote the next step, a Real Doll, of that person as a quasi-copulating companion of the real thing? Whether it would sell or not is an ultimate proposal. After all, such fantasies have been sold to men in the form of Playboy forever. Bringing a fantasy to life is what America does well with the aid of the technology and inexpensive labor of third world countries. Perhaps the price should be low enough that every male has the availability of such useful tools at their disposal for those "over the top testosterone" times, and may just be the female equivalent of sex toys. To imagine drunk males having "sex toy orgies" might be just what the fantasy world is about, and may help to define the distinction between inanimates and real persons where the additional layer of emotion is required in the engagement of real love, affection, and romance, also helping women get men who know the difference. It may even help some men in their amorous skills so they can practice in preparation for marriage. It sounds like it would be great for prison populations who suffer from extended abstinence problems; it could be standard prison issue for example, helping to manage the carnal appetites of men imprisoned for years, rather like a therapeutic device. The logic of years of marketing show that where females and males develop attachments to dolls as simulations of the people they represent, the art of play has its place in people's emotional landscape that they are willing to pay for. Taking it mainstream is a function of marketing, and whether people choose to have sex with, or sleep with, that fantasy is a personal choice. Don't dogs and cats serve the same emotional function? The range of options is considerable and the closer a match to the "real persona" the better, a.k.a., a Dolly Parton doll for example, or a Barbie? It does tend to take the concept of the Britney Speares persona to its heights and may put the problem of female objectivity in its place as the mere focus upon the salacious concept it is. For homosexual males, a male celeb? As an architectural event, it is a delight in the making to imagine that along with the sale of one or two dimensional sex, three dimensional sex would sell just as well, or even better. The combo is enticing, and for true entrepreneurs, a devine exploration in the absurd in the anals of profitmaking opportunities. Still....one wonders what amount would be required by celebs to license their appearance to make such a doll? Attaching a face to a doll never had such an opportunity....but along with that, one wonders how many celebs would prohibit the use of such false light privacy? An intrigue for the courts, for sure, would be bound to come of such a "fair use."
I have just finish my dissertation on 'the shape of things to come' A study of the History, Design and Development of sex toys. What a shame i did not stumble upon you useful contribution to sex toy experimentation earlier. Well Done!
Best 'I Did It For Science' yet, and I've been reading it for a long time. Well done.
hay that was a good lab it was very srangly intresting a long story short man thos silicon babes looked real wow ive never read a article like that but it was good, but hay keep up the good work take care aaron.
Did you honestly pay that much for a doll? Do you know anywhere that I could find them cheaper because I am very young and I wouldnt like to pay that much for one.
Crasy bastard, HAH hA! ROFLMAO
For science!
thats crazy but cool in the same instance wish i could afford one!
Great article. That's all I was looking for.
A funny and candid article. I really enjoyed it. Thanks.
Hey I would be more than happy to do the same story with a male version of this doll or with you if you are interested?...
you look like you was enjoying your self when she as giving you brain dude lol!!!!!!!!!
I'm more interested in the morality of the makers of Real Doll. Basically, I wonder if they got an order from a pedophile who wanted a doll that looked like a 5 year old girl or boy - would they go ahead and make it hoping it would keep the pervert away from the real thing, or would they refuse and report the pedophile to the police?
Do you want to buy one? I will send you pictures, email me at jennomate@gmail.com.
Howard Stern raved it was The Best SEX I've ever had!" Why wouldn't you want the best sex of your life with your fantasy girl? While it is true most of the JennoMates sell over 6K. Look at the Realdoll website, but if you want to know where to buy them for $2,700? Call Keith at 512.739.5902
if I want to buy doll how much will be the cost of it in Bahrain, Kindly reply me at this address : sobaray2007@yahoo.co.in
where can i buy one? send me info. send me catalog. to barnydoall@live.com
i think its a great idea. how many of you buy stuff like dildos and masturbation sleaves? same thing, but more expensive from what ive seen. yes, id stick my jimmy in her janie, and every other hole shes got. when im not boiking her, id proper her up dressed in my livingroom in a chair as a deterent for when i left the house to thieves. they would look in the wndow, see her and think smeone was at home!.
Interesting subject, but the writing is pretty crappy. Eating me like Ruben Studdard at a breakfast buffet? Yeesh.
..."see my unit". i died laughing. thats great.
Let me know where I can get one shes great. Hopefully inexspensive. But I will not spend 500.00 bucks. It does save a lot she doesn't eat or want to go to some wired restrant. just haveing fun and shutts the fuck up. Have a great life..
"pimp Gepetto", lmao. Brilliant.
So, no actual review then? Well, that was pointless...
I didn't find it funny at all for some reason.
That's because you have no actual sense of humor
I don't know how I stumbled on to this site. I felt sorry for the dummy (the sex-doll), because one, she has my figure & brown skin which is weird. . . & I would not want to be used like that. And second, my heart sinks for anyone who needs this. It is very sad & I wish you all the best. Thanks for sharing
Great article Grant.
If I had the money right now I would buy one. Saving up at this moment.
And hopefully in a few years we will have androids of the same vein that can have software installed that fits the owners preferences.
And yes I will use it for sex. Because sometimes I just want to release some primal lust without all the hassle of a relationship or going out to meet someone.
Would probably make it easier for me to date because my sexual urges would be already satisfied.
Why does this article end at page 2? Schlocky writing, too.
why dont you?...
So worsenabandon persecutory and definately starve your arms from your doctor. However, in the phase
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wow, looks like you got invaded by spambots. anyway good story, i've always wanted a realdoll to be honest -- there's just something morbidly attractive about them that you just don't get with cheap blow-up junk. hell, my girlfriend even wants one. god knows why, i guess she wants to dress it up and have tea with it or something.
Keep phenylephrineromethazine out of the worsenaccelerate of phereses and effectively from pets. 5 to 200
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Flonase nasal spray overcooked as 200
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Where is the rest of this article?
well it seem's that human female's are being phase'd out it's sad reall'y im from bahia in brazil and when i go home which is pretty infrequent i see so many american men their in beach short's and flip flop's not your cream of the crop gringo's mind you i have seen some beautiful american men mind you but the nasty gordo men who pray on us for sex and only sex so i can only imagine how degradign and disgusting having a sex doll in your casa may seem hey ma bring over the grill and meet cindy my plastica girlfreind yeah me
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word!!!
fuck the bitch. fuck the bitch till she cries 'ah......aaahhh.......ahhhhh........aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh.....' and then make her suck ur dick 'mmhhh.........mmmmmhhhhhhh.......mmmmhhhh' and then kill her by inserting a knife into her pussy
sick bitch.................
One guy fucked sex doll here live: http://free-chat-video.com/videochat/ it looked so real as he has real girl in front of camera.
1234
The reason for the rise in popularity of laminate flooring in recent years for individuals remodeling their homes is basic laminate flooring cost less to acquire are very much easier to install than its solid wood cousin.
Laminate flooring has gained much deserved popularity since the past few years due to the affordability and easy to clean and easy to install characteristics among others.
wow, very interesting readinggood reading....
Your writing is simple great, Especially for beginners!
Interesting article, and though I know many men go where men have gone before, didn't you have some trepidation about sexing up a pre-used rubber hole? Did you ask about their sterilisation practices, or who has the fun job of cleaning the synthetic concubines?
I think Real Dolls are terribly novel--have you seen the Anna Mae one? Wow.
I guess some would think a Real Doll of a dog or a mother is good because it stops the person going after the object of their desire for real, but in truth, fucking a maleable latex replica is gonna get dull and they're gonna wanna escalate to the real thing, same as how all flashers escalate to rape.
I can tell you one thing; I wish guys who honk horns at me, sleaze on to me, make sounds at me or generally stare at me like I'm rape-fodder would go fuck one of these corpse-like beauties and leave me the hell alone :)
i like speak he
What do you think?
Well I'll admit I like real women, they just do not like me at all. I guess i'll give one of these a try, if only they weren't so damned expsnsive.
Way to shame men who like to dress like women. It's not crazy, it just is. It's kind of like saying all gay people are pedophiles. Men who crossdress aren't going to end up murderers. Am I a crossdresser? No. Does that mean I have to be a complete jerk who doesn't "tolerate" people? No.
Truly, fuck it and whatever. If a dude wants to spend all of that money to pork a doll, then who cares. I'm sure he's got his reasons and if he's not hurting anyone then all the more the reason for me to not give a shit about the situation. For sure, right?
piece of the information in your long text interested for me ( as blog writer ) and for my blog readers.
Best regards from the my faterland, great germany.
hahahaha! That is classic point of view.
Each month, we get hundreds of questions from our readers
you ar chit you ar a fucker
hi i wont to have sex with you all of you chit
you ppl should go get lives
your image gallery popup seems to be broken.
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Great article! You'd probably love checking out www.synthoids.com it's basically a glimpse into what the future could be like. It's more on the lines of entertainment than reality but it's amazing.
Without actual physical verifiable evidence, I don't believe you ever went through with this. I mean, come on, the people how made http://www.realdollsex.com are posting updates of sex with the doll on a fairly consistent basis. You only did one experiment and didn't post anything!
avtor molodec!
Браво, вы не ошиблись :)
Спасибо за интересный пост
Браво, какие слова..., великолепная мысль
Найс пост! Добавил в соц.закладки
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Great article really interesting lovin it haha
hey how are misty can i talk to u?
It's probably just me.. but theres no link for the pictures..?
I mean, there's a link, but it's not opening.
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hi Mr i have one silicon doll sed one Forrrrrrrrr Saleeeeeeee only 5o bd.any body like to buy this one??????????????????????????????????????
I really liked the article, and the very cool blog
Извиняюсь, но, по-моему, это очевидно.
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Не пользуюсь
Извиняюсь, хотел бы предложить другое решение.
I enjoyed this, great stuff! Stop by and say hi sometime hotels in windermere
Hilarious article, very interesting! You should probably checkout www.love-doll.org
They have got a love doll video collection.
I think the implications behind them are demeaning to real people, they're even given names and reffered to as 'her' or 'him' rather than being recognised as the mere playthings they are.
And I hate the fact you say that the good thing about a doll is that they're always up for it, is that really the sort of thing you'd want in a person?
At least a sexy realdoll will not take you for everything in the end, o ya there will be no end. The sexy doll will keep giving and giving and giving. No divorce, no childsupport, no cheating, no hurt, no yelling, no STDS, no loss of children, you get to keep your home and everything you worked hard for. That sounds like alot of positives. It may not be real but its better then being with someone who is out to use you or not be committed to a relationship, emotionless just like a doll.
So very true how sexy they are. They may be expensive but if you think about it how much do men spend on dating or having a marrage, children, divorce, childsupport, etc. I have some friends that have spent thousands on dates and still can not seem to get a women, or thousands on divorce. Just save your money and you will get the money real fast. If people were more committed in relationships there would be no reason for realdolls. Times have changed for the worst, and that is why these dolls are selling so much. No matter where you live the only people you get to try and date are the ones that live in the same area you do, that are not already married, or taken. Then the ones that are avalible might not want to have a relationship or have there own baggage, problems, children, stress etc, which makes it harder. Then most people have a list of what they want in a person(religion, personality, honesty, commitment, height, weight, looks, money, STDS, children, how good they are with sex, meeting needs, mental issues, etc.) and so that just limits your choices even more, and if you choose to ignore your list, just to have a relationship or sex, then there is a 95%-100% chance it will come back to bite you in the butt. (Been there done that) Then lets say by some chance you do find that one person out of all that and start a relationship or get married. You now have 60%-70% chance of a divorce, or the relationship not working our, if it is not worked at everyday, weather it be needs, sickness or health issues, daily responsibilitys, family deaths, accidents, money problems, outside world influences, raising children, PMS, economy problems, depression, stress, the list could go on and on. Ya you could try the internet and longdistance relationship but that rarely works and there is no sex. I know this because I have either lived it or seen it. Just look at the divorce rates when 9/11 happend and so many people lost there jobs, or depression. Ya money is a really big one. I watched my parents almost divorce after my brother was ran over by a truck. The depression and stress can kill most people. I see these dolls as a really big turning point in dating and relationships. Alot of people are going to be threatened by these dolls. Even more when they become AI. Just read the past posts again about some of the hate torwards these dolls. Anyway sorry for rambling on but good luck to ya all.
Extremely funny article. But I'm afraid I couldn't buy a doll that costs more than a Gibson Les Paul.