My First Time

Female, 17, Venezuela

By the age of seventeen, I was sexually active: I had given handjobs (two) and blowjobs (four). But so far no one but me had been anywhere near my vagina.

Still, I fooled everyone I knew into believing otherwise. I'm not sure why I lied about my virginity; there was no peer pressure, and I wasn't actually trying to impress anyone. I just didn't have anything interesting to say one day when I was fifteen, so I told my best friend that I'd had sex with one of my cousin's friends. Instead of admitting that I'd lied, I just spread the rumor around, and people believed me... including my best male friend, whom I'll call E.

E was gorgeous and a bit of a dick. We had some sort of sexual tension, in that I'd had a crush on him since eighth grade and he was desperate for a fuck from anyone. I'd given him a blowjob about two months prior, but I wasn't exactly eager for someone who knew me so well to learn that I was a huge liar. (My original plan was to wait until college and start a new life of honesty.)

After the aforementioned blowjob, we kept talking about the possibility of making it a regular thing, with the only impediment being that we had nowhere to do it. The blowjob had been a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity — he was casually at my place while both my parents and my little sister were gone. But then came Christmas break, and everyone was out of town, including my cousin, who was in Colombia with her family. She left me her apartment's keys with the intention of me picking up her boyfriend's Christmas present, but it was the best chance I had of being alone with E.

We arrived at my cousin's apartment, and went straight to bed. We were lying down, talking and goofing around, when suddenly I noticed his hand trying to unbutton my bra, and then touching my nipples. His hand began to run over my torso until he reached my pants and unbuttoned them. Before I knew it I was giving him another blowjob, when he said with a delicious grin on his face, "I think it's time," and showed me the condom he was keeping in his pocket.

Since he thought I wasn't a virgin, he insisted on me being on top. I thought I could do it, but I couldn't. I told him it was because it had been so long since the last time, and we gave up and decided to switch to missionary. It hurt like hell, but then it didn't hurt anymore. On the other hand, it didn't feel good either, and I started to think about how I was being penetrated on my cousin's bed by someone who felt nothing (romantically) for me — and who in fact was in a two-year-plus relationship with a girl I thought was much better than me.

After he came, I took off his condom, and noticed some blood on the tip: my period had just come back. He laughed about it, pulled his pants back on, and said he would walk me home. When he left me at my front door and kissed me goodbye on the cheek as usual, I realized that I'd just had sex with a guy and we hadn't even kissed.

Female • 16 years old • Israel

We became friends right from the start. We found that we had the same cynical and sexual sense of humor.

Female • 22 years old • New England

"I can't tell you how glad I am that I never signed that 'True Love Waits' pledge."

Male • 15 years old • Washington DC

"I had never planned to lose my virginity to a guy—let alone Rob. I planned to pretend to be straight for as long as possible."