My First Time

My First Time: “He got in the mosh pit.”

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I remember the first time I saw him. I really didn’t think too much and an old acquaintance told me that I should watch out because he was trouble. I wish I could say that it sparked something wild in me, but it didn’t. It wasn’t until about a month later that we saw each other again and I went up and said hello. He invited me to the movie that he was waiting in line for with two other females — they were not pleased.

We started dating shortly after that. I remember the moment that I decided that he was the one I wanted to give myself to. He was older so we didn’t get to see too much of each other, but we were on the phone one time. I guess he thought he had put it on mute and I heard him say in the background to one of his guy friends that he was in love with me — a young love. Convenient.

We were meeting up at the last show of one of my favorite local bands the week after this, on January 2, 2003. The mosh pit was amazing, but I started to get nervous because he was late. Turns out he was in a car accident and had busted his head pretty bad. Being the badass my 16-year-old self thought he was, he got in the mosh pit. There was one guy in particular that seemed to be targeting him, and in all my hormonal rage, I jumped from the side and clotheslined him. As I was sitting on top of this guy ready to pummel him, two of my boyfriend’s friends pulled me off and took care of things for me.

When we got back to his house people were tripping on cold medicine – I wasn’t interested and we went to his room.

When we got back to his house people were tripping on cold medicine – I wasn’t interested and we went to his room. I remember thinking that he was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Dark eyes the color of dried blood, with that warm red tint to them. He was very gentle with me (which for some reason annoyed me) given my preferences now. I finally understand. The condom, a red Lifestyle, broke about 5 minutes in. We changed it and continued. I decided that I was bored and that it was my turn on top. Yee haw. We finished and he kissed me and asked if I was sure it was my first time. I smirked and said, “Yeah, up until about 15 minutes ago.”

I remember the song on the stereo was “Iron Man” and found out later that his friends were taking bets in the living room because they knew I was a virgin. Whoever won, they actually lost because he said that we hadn’t had sex. All in all, I feel like it was a pretty standard first time. The relationship continued for about three years. It was turbulent but I learned a lot. I also learned that he was awful in bed and all of the girls he dated after me agree. We are all friends and it still makes him visibly uncomfortable when we are all at the same party.

— Female, 16, Virginia