Love & Sex

My First Time

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Male • 17 years old • Illinois

My virginity was auctioned off. It was the summer after my senior year of high school, and I was working at a Democratic political canvassing organization, surrounded by older college girls. One day word got out that I was still a big V, and they all agreed that they'd better do something about it. I'm not sure if they drew straws or put me up for sale at Sotheby's, but when I got to work Monday morning, I was gigglingly informed that my days among the lovelorn were about to end.

That Friday night, I bicycled across town from my mom's house to the apartment of my "date" (whose initials were actually NRA — glad I didn't have to meet her father!). There was no pretense; I don't even think I brought anything for us to drink (it would have been hard for me to get, as I was still underaged and super baby-faced). She invited me in and we started kissing; soon enough we were on her bed, and there we stayed — and stayed and stayed and stayed.


Illustration by Thomas Pitilli

Like the experienced and conscientious tutor she was, she wanted to be thorough, and like the diligent student I was, I kept wanting to go back for more.

At some point late in the night we finally went to sleep, and when I woke up a few hours later, I discovered that the human anatomy has a lot of muscles I had never used before — I was in agony! I honestly could barely walk, and the ten-mile bike ride home was excruciating (though somehow I think I was still smiling the whole way).

Monday morning, I entered the office to a loud ovation, not so much (as Ms. NRA told me later) for any skill I'd demonstrated, just for my boyish enthusiasm. Alas, our romance was not to last; a week after that, she passed me on to one of her friends, a specialist apparently in the very young and shy, who gave me a moonlight blowjob on the high school football field. Moral of the story: be a Democrat!