So, you said you're married. How did you meet your wife?
I was bartending at a nightclub and she came in on her birthday.
Did she hit on you? Did you buy her a drink for her birthday?
Well, she doesn't drink. She was there with her friends and cousins, and then I would see her around later at certain nightclubs, and we just got to know each other.
How did you know that she was the one you wanted to marry?
That's a good question. I just couldn't stop thinking about her. She was the first person I ever bought anything for — a nice necklace for her birthday. I spent almost every waking moment thinking about her. I couldn't get her out of my mind. We got along so well, and we're polar opposites, so that was amazing.
Do you think it was love at first sight?
No, I don't think it was. But it actually was pretty quick.
How long have you been married for?
Twenty-one years. And we have two kids.
Wow! So, what advice would you give to people who are looking to find their soulmate or to settle down?
I always tell people, "Don't crowd someone." Give them their own space. I'm more of a loner, and she's a social butterfly, and it works out well for us. Always has. And trust. I trust her with my life. And I'd never said that about anybody outside of my immediate family.
After twenty-one years, how do you keep a marriage passionate?
She still just gets me going. She's a very good-looking woman. I'm trying to keep it clean, but... well, we do things like role-playing. We pretend we're other people. I'll wear my uniform and she'll be a lonely passenger on my train. Crazy things like that. Or, I'll come home and she'll have something set up for me. I like — and she's not like this — but I like goth-type chicks and she'll dress up like a goth chick for me. And that drives me crazy. She's really cool.
Sounds like it. And what do you do for her?
Well, and I'm glad she's not around to hear this, but she likes to see me masturbate in front of her.
Well, of course. We like to go out dancing. Go out to plays.