Talking to Strangers: Brooklyn, NY

Nerve asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.

by Alyssa Carroll

Ross, 26

What do you do?
I'm a musician. I play guitar and people hire me to do session work for live shows and recording.

Do you meet a lot of people doing that?
Definitely. I met the girl who I'm seeing right now through music. She was playing in a different band that we were playing with, and then we ended up seeing each other at a different gig.

What do you like about her?
She's super-sweet, very smart, and a very reasonable person. So far I'm not sensing any weird irrational traits, which are a huge turn-off for me. The first time I see someone is making irrational decisions, I'm usually done with it.

Did you date a crazy person that made you wary?
Yup. She was super-irrational. She had no reasoning for why she'd be upset, so you couldn't empathize with her. She'd get upset, and if I asked her what was wrong, she'd say that I "wouldn't understand." Odds are a lot of times with people like that, they don't know why they're mad themselves, and that's why they can't express it to you. That's why I like people who can rationalize and think about why they're angry or upset. Someone who doesn't do that is just too hard to reason with. They just want to be angry.

What's the best date you've been on recently?
I like full-day hangs. So we started off with brunch, walking around shopping and going to see music. There's a Moroccan place that I love to go to. It's really low-key and has a good vibe. It's an awesome place to bring people.

What's your craziest hookup story?
Usually it's just meet a girl at a show, dance, go to a bar, and then hook up. I try to stay away from having sex in a public place or anything crazy like that.

Not even any groupies?
Not really actually. Pretty much just standard getting drunk and hooking up. I haven't had any girls rushing backstage or doing any Led Zeppelin stuff.

Do you notice a lot of girls trying to catch your eye while you're playing?
Yeah, I definitely notice some. Sometimes I don't know if they're looking at me or just into the music, though, since I play mostly dance and electronic music. I definitely see some girls trying to make eye contact though.

What's the best way to impress you?
I like girls who are really forthright. I like girls who just approach you. It doesn't take much to impress me if you're just really funny, down to earth, and chill. And hot.

What do you see happening with the girl you're seeing now?
I don't really know yet. I haven't had a long-term relationship in a really long time, because I've been focusing on the music thing, but I really like her.

Does it make you nervous that you guys will individually be on the road touring a lot?
Nope, not really. If we were serious and she cheated on me, I'd just move on. It's like letting the problem solve itself. If they're a bad person, then I can just move on, and I'd rather it happen sooner than later.