What do you do for a living?
I'm a television director. Does that get me laid? Yeah, it got me my wife! We started off working together. Like-minded people tend to work in the same field. We decided that we liked each other. It was weird that we worked together at first. It was very tricky. So we decided not to see each other while we worked together. But once she moved away and worked with other people, then we could date. Then it was fine. It was long-distance for a little bit. Communication is key to keep that going. No phone sex or anything though. I wish there'd been a bit more of that.
Have you ever been cheated on?
Actually, my ex-girlfriend worked at an Irish pub in Atlantic City. At the time, Pauly Shore was doing a show at the Taj Mahal. She was working at the pub, and she ended up shacking up with Pauly Shore during the time he was doing this show. But it was pretty humiliating knowing that Pauly Shore, the Weasel, weaseled me. That sucked. I actually went out and got a devil tattoo of a lady. It was very impulsive, but I felt that bad about it.
Did you parents ever give you any advice about sex?
My dad just told me in a weird way before I was even old enough to know what he was talking about. He told me just have a good time. I was thirteen or fourteen. I had no clue what he was talking about. He just wanted me to know that it was cool.
Have you ever been offended in the bedroom?
Not really. I mean, we're all in there together, you know?
Has anyone done anything crazy to get you attention?
Well, this is going way back, but in high school, this girl erased my name into my arm. She took an eraser and wore away the skin to the point of almost cutting herself, so at the end it said "Ron." It did not work. She was fucking crazy. That's so stupid.