Steve, 40
What do you do for a living?
I'm a homegrown investor.
Does that get you a lot of dates?
Uh, no. I have a girlfriend wife.
Hold up — is she your girlfriend or your wife?
Well, I've lived with her for five years. You could call it "common-law."
But you both know you're committed to each other...
Yeah. Well, I don't know about her, but I am.
Wait, you live with her, but you don't know if she's committed to you?
Well, it doesn't matter to me. I guess we have our understanding.
Well, you guys are about as low-key as they come. What first attracted you to her?
We met over the net. We were friends before and we felt like we were right for each other.
Was it a dating site?
I responded to something she wrote on MySpace or Facebook. It was MySpace, so that was back in the day.
When did you meet in real life?
Three or four months after we started talking.
Where did you meet?
I went to her country.
Where is she from?
Romania.
How did this long distance romance play out?
We felt connected after a couple of months of knowing each other, so I visited. I stayed there for four days. She was planning on migrating here anyway, so within a month after I returned to Montreal, she moved here and we started living together right away. It just felt right.
You make it sound so simple.
It is.
Is this the craziest thing you've done for love?
No, I wouldn't say so. It's not crazy. I wasn't planning on going to get her. I just wanted to see her.
So you've been together for five years. Do you ever feel any stress to legitimize things with a legal marriage?
No. I was with someone else before and I had a kid with her. I left that person. So when I met my girlfriend, I wasn't looking for anything. I was tired of relationships. But after I met her, it kind of changed.
What was it like to date as a parent?
Well, we didn't really date. We talked to each other online and then we started living together right away.
But did your kid change the way you approached it?
It didn't change anything. I'm me. I can't change just because I have a son.
Wasn't it important for you to find someone who could get close to your son?
There were some questions about that, but it all fell into place. I think once you put a lot of expectations in relationships, things get complicated. The less you expect, the less stressful your life is going to be. I do things because I want to do them. If I feel it, I'll do it. I don't expect anything, so I can't really get hurt.
I can't tell if you're fearless or just emotionless.
My girlfriend could turn around tomorrow and say "You know what? I'm done with you. Screw you. I'm going back home." I wouldn't care.
Wait, you wouldn't be hurt by that?
It might bother me a little bit, but I know that she would be doing it because she wants it. And if she's passionate about leaving, I don't need anything more than that. I had five great years with her and I'd wish her good luck.
Danny, 29
What do you do for a living?
You mean for money? In French, we say, "chômage," which means unemployment. I build pools in the summer and receive money from the government in the winter. I'm trying to get something else to get out of the system, though.
Is being unemployed detrimental to your love life?
It's a bad thing. When I had a job, it ate all my time and Sunday was my only day off. I'd be so tired that I'd stay home and would only move between the fridge and the bed. Even though I don't have a job now, I still work on projects that don't leave me a lot of free time.
When normally turns you on?
Different things. But I like chubby girls more than others.
And in terms of personality?
Someone who can take the lead.
Any dealbreakers?
Someone who's just into money or artificial things. Phoniness. I can see it from far away.
What is dating in Montreal like?
Montreal is open to many cultures. We're closer to other people here.
Do you regret anything in your love life?
Not really. When something doesn't go well in love, you can take it as a personal injury or a challenge. You can be divided or you can transform yourself into something bigger. If you look at experiences as personal injuries, you might end up dividing yourself from something that could change you. So I've had no bad experiences. Just experiences.
If you could change something about women, what would you change?
In every woman? Well, I'd make it so that they'd only love one man: me. One of my fantasies is to be the only man in the world. For one day.
What would you do?
I don't know. I'd be naked for sure. Like the only piece of candy on Halloween.
You want to be objectified.
Maybe! But that doesn't answer your question about what I'd like to change in women. I need to think about that one for a couple hours... I don't know. I still want to learn from women, so I can't say.
Clemence, 24
What do you do for a living?
I'm a social worker, but right now I'm a waitress.
Does that get you any dates?
Not really.
What do you look for in a significant other?
Good looking, nice, funny.
Where are you from?
I'm originally from Paris.
How is dating in Paris different from dating in Montreal?
It's different when you go to dance. Parisian women don't move their butts against men.
Oh, so Montreal women move their butts?
A lot.
Is that a turn-on or a turn-off?
Both.
If you're not grinding up against some dude, what's your signature move?
I like to move my hands.
Any funny hookup stories?
Oh, I don't know. I was out drinking with friends and I told them I wanted to try to get with a woman. So around five in the morning, I ended up on the dance floor with a woman and I did the chicken dance. We got together and it was fun. Afterwards, she was in love with me. Okay, not really. But she was calling me all the time. I had to tell her I wasn't interested.
What do you do when you are interested in someone?
I can't even look at them. I just don't talk to them. I can be really mean.
What's the difference between dancing with a woman and dancing with a man?
With a woman, it can be very, very sensual. But I guess dancing with a man is sensual too. The woman has boobs and a man has a... you know. When you dance with him, it can sometimes... you know.
Why did you move from Paris to Montreal?
I love it! I love the people, the music, the food. This whole country.
Want to talk to strangers in your town? Email submissions@nerve.com.






Commentarium (16 Comments)
Clemence and Danny would make the perfect couple. Social worker and leech, united to make babies whose progressive ideals are great because you are using someone elses money.
Speaking of perfect couples, I know a lady who'd be just your type, ggg, and I think the two of you should be introduced ASAP. Watch out, though, she's a real man-eater! Just don't mention the red birthmark she has on her abdomen; I hear it's shaped a bit like an hourglass...
And one of them a frenchwoman uncomfortable with saying the word penis. I don't know where French women got such a reputation for sexuality, every single one I've met has been a little short of a prude.
@Ryan:
I think when Clemence said "you know", she was being coquetteish or coy, or even humorous. I don't think she was too shy or uncomfortable to say "penis."
was dull.
Sorry
Hey Jason, it's me, a straight guy. Listen, I just want to thank you for taking your chiseled body, magificent cheek bones, lovely eyes, and perfect shoulders and playing for the other team. I mean damn, I'm a pretty confident guy, but I'm not sure I can compete with "gorgeous Cirque du Soleil acrobat."
I was super excited when I saw my beloved Montreal used as center-stage for TTS...until I saw half of the people interviewed weren't even from the city. Montreal is so vibrant and colorful, and you managed to pick out-of-towners and protesters right outside Mont-Royal metro station. Definitely does not reflect how great the city is...
Montreal is full of immigrants/out-of-towners. I think it's part of what gives it "colorful and vibrant" quality.
(Really loved the first 2 interviews by the way)
Whenever I do Talking To Strangers interviews, I try to feature people who live in that particular city. 3 out of the 6 people here are not native Montréalais, but all of them live there now. Look at any other major city. Are the only residents worth talking to the ones who were born there?
I was just kinda surprised because this was the first montreal one that didn't have any ex-pornstars in it.
Bandana's proposal almost choked me up. That's the sweetest most romantic thing I've ever read and I'm a straight dude.
Yeah, me too. I really loved her interview and I think I'm going to dare be romantic in a masculine way when I want to. No reason not to dare, this lady's right!
Texas. Gay. Acrobat. Cirque. That's a damned movie right there.
You make a good point, Ruth. Props to you for always getting your hands on such diversity. You go!
Some of this stuff can be really touching, you know, finding out about how people met under different circumstances, i met my boyfriend when i was in town and we bumped into him accidentally, not the most romantic hookup really...
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