Love & Sex

Talking to Strangers: New York, NY

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Nerve asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.


 

Christina, 18

So, Bjork, what's the craziest thing you've ever done in the bedroom?
Brought in my swan costume.

Have you ever offended anyone in the bedroom?
When I've been too drunk, I've probably said something I didn't mean to. Like, if they asked if they were good, I probably said no. I'm honest, I'm a Capricorn.

What do you do for a living?
I'm a student, studying dramatic writing — screen writing.

What's the dating pool like in your major?
A lot of the guys are extremely strange. There's a guy who wears a leather trenchcoat every day, and it's kind of creepy. Like axe-murderer creepy. He just wears a giant trenchcoat and doesn't talk to anybody at all.

What's the best major to date, do you think?
That's a good question. I'm still trying to figure that out.

What's the most awkward way a guy's tried to pick you up?
By grabbing my elbow and then excusing himself, saying he was accidentally bumping into me. That was really awkward. I didn't know how to react to that.

Did he get a date out of that?
No. I shut that down.

Super Mario, 24

What made you dress as Mario tonight?
My roommate was Yoshi, and I couldn't resist when I went to the costume store and saw the Mario costume.

What do you for a living?
I'm a graphic designer [and a] musician.

What do you love about women?
I like really intelligent, intellectual women. I like to build up conversation, try to get to know someone. That turns me on.

What's the hottest thing a girl's ever done for you?
Vampire sex. Like, role-play. Pretending.

Were you the vampire or was she the vampire?
It went both ways. Dual vampires. I bit first and she bit in return.

How did you guys decided on vampire sex?
We were watching Buffy, and we were just like, "Hey want to go for it?"

Where's the craziest place you've ever had sex?
I used to live in this commune for four months of the year, and there was this abandoned hotel with these really old rooms that people used to live in, though no one's there any more. It was kind of eerie. There were beds and mattresses, but it was pretty dirty. I mean, I was in high school and I couldn't do it around my parents. It was gross. I wouldn't do it again. But I was really young, I was excited. It was like my first girlfriend ever.

You lived on a commune in high school?
Yeah, like, not necessarily a commune, it's a kind of community, we lived in this wooded area around Lake Michigan.

Have you ever offended anyone in the bedroom?
Maybe not. No. Well, I've not really been into it sometimes, but I don't think that's really offensive.

It's a little offensive.
Is it?

If a guy's not into it? That's pretty, like —
All right, I've offended some. I was depressed, what can I say?


 

Rica, 30

What do you do for a living?
I do business development and sales. And tonight I'm an off-duty police officer.

Do either of those jobs ever get you laid?
Yes.

Do you have any good stories about hooking up from work?
Actually not from work, but from a party. I can think of this really hot guy I met and we actually did it the first night and it was, oh my God, delicious. We went out and I had one beer and I can't drink, so I made a deal. I said that if I got some downtown — the oral thing — I would give him some. One thing led to another. I promised him that I would suck his lollipop, but I didn't.

Oooh, you bitch.
No, I did not! And the sex was hot, and we've been doing for about four years now. It kind of worked out, we're dating seriously. So I have to be a good girl now, I can't be a naughty girl anymore. But, we do flirt.

What's the best date you've ever been on?
The best date was [going to] SeaWorld on an all-expenses-paid trip. Getting to fly first class, getting to shop, getting to eat, getting to go to SeaWorld. Plus, I didn't know I was flying first class — so as soon as the plane landed in Florida, we just had to rip off our clothes.

If you like a guy, how do you show him you're interested?
The look, and the walk. And he gets the booty — you gotta slap the booty, because the booty has, you know, this jiggly, jiggly thing.

Has anyone ever offended you in the bedroom?
Yes. My favorite thing is oral sex, and if I don't get that I can be very mean. That's very offensive: I have to get what I want before he can get what he wants, know what I'm saying?

And men hold back?
A lot of times. There was this one time I put on my lingerie and I lay on a bed, and he came over and he wanted to have sex. And I said, "Well, you're not going to get the kitty cat unless you go downtown." So he was lying there and we were playing the waiting game, but you know, I turn my butt over, pull my lingerie up, shake my butt a little bit, and that kind of got the job done. So I wasn't offended for very long.


Luis, 21

What do you do for a living?
I work in Rite Aid, in the pharmacy. I sell drugs for a living.

Does that ever get you laid?
Does it, oh boy. I'm being a priest right now, I can't talk crazy like that.

What made you go with the priest outfit tonight?
It's a long story. When I tried to quit the Rite Aid job, I got a new job and I had a suit on, and we all went out, [and my friends] said I looked like a priest. They made fun of me for months and months, so I decided to go with the priest.

What's the hottest thing a girl's ever done for you?
The hottest thing? Bathed me in the shower. It's very nice, romantic, rubbed my back, we ended up making love.

Making love?
It's the cross.

Have you ever offended anyone in the bedroom?
I've never been like, "Ew bitch, you wack." But mentally I've been like, "Damn, this bitch sucks."

Where's the craziest place you've had sex?
Outside on the sidewalk, two in the morning, and cars were passing.

How naked did you guys get?
Right here [gestures to crotch]. That's all you need. All you need is this section right here. All you need to work.

What's the best date you ever been on?
I went on a date with a girl once for the first time ever, and we went to the movies and we had ice cream, had a kiss in the rain. It was real, real nice.

What kind of girl do you usually go for?
Spanish girls. [They're] a little bit shorter, nice body, not too skinny. When they talk Spanish while we're messing around, that is the sexiest shit.

Do you have a favorite hook up story?
Let's see. Today I was at work, and this new girl that works there, she was giving me the eye and she was like, "Oh you frontin', you frontin'. . ." If I'm frontin', you know, let's go downstairs. So we went downstairs and we fooled around in the basement for a little bit. That was just a couple hours ago, it was freakin' crazy.


 

Kay, 26

What is your costume tonight?
I am a ladybug. A sexy ladybug.

What do you do for a living?
I am a listings director for a real-estate firm.

Does your job ever get you dates?
No! I wouldn't know if it would. I've never tried because I don't need to.

What's the craziest hook-up you've ever had?
The two of us used to work in a health clinic, and it was in the bathroom, the patient bathroom, after shift. We almost got caught by the janitor.

How close were you to getting caught?
Very! Like a knock on the door. He's banging on the door, "Who's in there?" And I had to pretend it was just me. I was like, "It's just me, I'm not done yet, leave me alone, go away." So we waited until we thought he was gone and then we ran out.

So he didn't see you?
No. He had a feeling it was us, though. He saw us later and was like, "Were you in the bathroom?!" And we were like, nooooo.

How do you let a guy know you're interested?
There's a look that women have. I'm a very affectionate person, so a touch here, a look there. It's very easy to send the message that you're interested.

Has anyone ever offended you in the bedroom?
Yeah. Long story short, he kind of acted like the only person there and like he was the only person who mattered. And that was a problem. I just cut him off. No more of that, cause you don't know how to act.

Did you finish that night or were you just like, "Excuse me, you have to leave now"?
Oh, we finished. Well, he finished. And that was the end of that.

Rubin, 22

What do you do for a living?
I'm a sales associate for The North Face.

What made you go with the Gumby outfit tonight?
I wanted to be something that no one would be.

Have you ever been offended in the bedroom?
Yeah. She told me it was too small.

What did you do?
I bought some Enzyte, the pills, but that didn't work. I got a penis pump and that didn't work, either.

How small are we talking?
About four inches.

The average is five so that's, um, sub-par.
I got the short end of the stick, literally.

What's the hottest thing a girl's ever done for you?
Shave my balls, that was probably the hottest thing she's ever done for me. I didn't have to do anything, just watch. It was pretty awesome.

Have you ever taken a girl on a date and halfway through, you were like, I'm rocking this date.
Yeah, I took a girl to McDonald's once and she actually stood and ate, and we went back to my place and we got it on.

And how much did you spend on that date?
Well, it was strictly dollar menu, so probably about four dollars.

Interviews by Meghan Pleticha. Photography by Briana E. Heard.