Love & Sex

Talking to Strangers: New York, NY

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Nerve asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.

Talking to Strangers - Maxime

Maxime, 25

What do you do for a living?
I'm a high-school teacher in France.

Are you French?
Yes. I'm on holiday. I'm traveling around the East Coast.

Bienvenue aux États-Unis.
Merci.

So, does being a high-school teacher get you dates?
No and yes. No, because all my coworkers are engaged. Yes, because when I go to bars, girls like that I work with kids. They think I will make a good father or something.

When it comes to dating, do you have any moves?
Oui. Je parle Français. Et les femmes adorent les hommes Français.

Wow. You French guys are good.
Merci. But honestly, I also smile a lot. Make a lot of eye contact. I think this is important. The woman understands that I like her. And also that I am confident. I'm not afraid to look at a beautiful woman and tell her she is beautiful.

What's your favorite hookup story?
Hmm, it's hard to choose one. I guess it is cliché, but a ménage à trois.

It's cliché but still interesting. What happened?
Nothing too exciting. We were all friends and at this party. We were drinking and ended up in the bathroom together. Girls always need to go to the bathroom together it seems. I never understood why. Maybe it's because they want to have sex together with a man. Anyway, I followed them because they had been smiling at me all night. And then we had sex. Nothing crazy.

Having sex with two girls in a bathroom during a party seems pretty crazy to me.
That's because you are an American.

Duly noted. Do you have any sex goals?
To have sex with many girls at once.

More than two?
Three would be perfect.

Why perfect?
Because there are three parts of me that I like touched. Would you like to know where?

 

Talking to Strangers - Aishling

Aishling, 20

What do you do for a living?
I'm going to college for nursing in Dublin. But right now I'm waitressing in New York City. I grew up in Ireland, but I was born in the Bronx.

Do either of your jobs get your dates?
Yes. College definitely because I go out in the city a lot. I meet a ton of people because I'm really open and friendly. And waitressing is a definite too. I get a lot of numbers. But I never really call them back. I'm not interested in any of the guys at the pub where I work.

Why's that?
Eh, they're too old and we don't have anything in common.

Do you have any dealbreakers when it comes to dating?
I hate when a guy talks too much. Most men need to listen more and not take over the conversation. They need to get to know the girl. But also, they can't be too quiet.

Do you have a move?
Just acting extra-flirty and interested in what they have to say. I make a lot of eye contact too. Laugh at their jokes. But I make them make the effort. I mean, I would never ask a guy out. Maybe it's a confidence thing. But I think the guy should be the one making the move to ask the girl out, or for her number, or for a kiss, or for whatever.

I'm surprised. You seem like a very confident woman.
Looks are deceiving.

Where's the craziest place you've had sex?
I was on holiday with my ex and we had sex on the balcony of our hotel. People definitely could have seen us.

What's the weirdest thing someone's asked you to do in the bedroom?
Take a video. I would only do that with a boyfriend though. Never with a stranger.

So you've made home videos?
Just one. But I wasn't too into it. It wasn't like both of us were in the shot. It was more of a Paris Hilton video. He was taking it with his phone so only I was in the shot. It's not hot just looking at yourself, you know?

 

Talking to Strangers - Michael

Michael, 29

What do you do for a living?
Bouncer.

Does this job get you dates?
Yes. I don't know why that is though. Something about girls and authority.

Would you say you're authoritative in the bedroom?
I guess. I do like to take control… a little hair pulling, a little spanking…

No offense, but you don't seem like an overly authoritative person.
I'm very bashful.

Do you have a move?
Nah, I'm too shy. Most of my could-be relationships end in friendships because of this. I'm too afraid to make a move. I don't really pursue girls.

What's your favorite hookup story?
Last year, I was working, and this chick who came in kept talking to me. She was really hot. My boss saw her talking to me all night. He knew what was going on. So he finally came over and told me to "take a break." He helped me out a lot that night. We ended up in the bathroom.

The handicap bathroom?
How did you know?

Lucky guess. Where's the craziest place you've had sex?
In a van.

That's not too crazy.
It was outside of a playground.

Interesting.
It wasn't anything like that. The girl was late to meet her boyfriend. So we just picked a random spot. It happened to be outside of a playground.

Do you have any sex goals?
What do you mean?

Like a threesome?
Been there.

Sex in a taxi?
Who hasn't?

Me.
Sucks.

Talking to Strangers - Meg

Meg, 27

What do you do for a living?
I'm an actress. I also work at a bar.

Does that get you dates?
Yes. Well, it gets me a lot of phone numbers.

Do you ever call any of them?
Not really. Most of the guys who come in are weird. I mean, there was this really hot guy who gave me his number last week. I called him. But he started talking about how his mother passed away when he was ten, how in debt he was, and how he had been depressed.

Do you have any dealbreakers when it comes to dating?
That was one.

What's the weirdest thing someone's ever asked you to do in bed?
Spanking. Like, hardcore spanking. It was especially weird because he was a nine-to-five kind of guy. Ugh! There are so many weird guys out there.

Where's the craziest place you've had sex?
In the car while driving.

Wow. Who was driving?
He was. I straddled him. In retrospect, it was pretty dangerous.

 

Talking to Strangers - Jennifer

Jennifer, 36

What do you do for a living?
Manufacturing.

Does this job get you dates?
Not at all. It's a very tight-knit organization, so I've known these people forever. We're like family.

Do you have any moves when it comes to dating?
No particular moves. I talk to anybody. It's sad, but I guess "my move" is that I'm a real person. I don't play any games. I tell it like it is and expect the same.

What's your favorite hookup story?
It was in college at this bar. We were college sweethearts. We were slow dancing together and that's when I knew I was in love with him. But he's the love that got away. Maybe that's why it's my favorite.

What's the weirdest thing someone's asked you to do in bed?
Nothing crazy. We're small-town girls. I guess the weirdest thing would be like a sex position.

Can you explain a weird sex position you've been asked to do?
What's that one where I'm on my hands and knees, and he's kneeling behind me?

Doggie-style?
Yeah. I think that's it. That's sort of weird.

Where's the craziest place you've had sex?
On the beach.

That seems kind of romantic actually.
It's not. There were people around. And sand got up into crevices it just shouldn't be in. It was not romantic in the least.

When it comes to dating, do you have any dealbreakers?
I just want someone to be honest and real with me, like I am with them. Money doesn't matter. Neither does a job. I guess the guy has to have motivation to catch my eye. He needs to care about something. I can't stand when guys just sit on their butts all day doing nothing. Women too. Everyone needs a passion in his or her life.

Do you have any sex goals?
Well, you have my age. After a while, sex isn't really important. I mean, it is. But not like when you were young. It's not the end all be all. It's not the most important aspect of a relationship, or life for that matter. There are too many other things that come into play, like love, other passions, life. I think it's this way for girls at least. Guys are a different story.

 

Talking to Strangers - Chris

Chris, 32

What do you do for a living?
Bartend.

Does this job get you dates?
It's the only job that gets me dates. But I'm going to tell you about a cliché: everybody thinks bartenders go home with all these girls, but honestly, girls don't want to wait around until four a.m. watching you clean the bar and count your money. Especially after all their friends are gone. We get laid a lot less than people think.

Do you have a move when trying to pick up girls?
I try to be as charming as possible. "No tab" at the end of the night is a good one. But I like to keep them answering questions. That way she knows that I'm interested in her and not full of myself.

Are you a tits or ass guy?
Definitely ass. And I have a really good reason for that too.

Do tell.
It's all about natural history. When you think about it, we're the only upright species. Every other species are bent over, they're on all fours. So the ass is really what the males are going for. That's what they want to see. That's their point of entry.

"Point of entry?"
Well, it is. Cats, bears, dogs… it doesn't matter. And that's why men love a woman's ass more than her tits. When a girl walks by, it doesn't matter if you're interested in her or not. A guy is going to turn around and check out her ass. Young guys. Old guys. Doesn't matter. It's natural history.

You really thought about this.
Yeah. Ass is far superior to tits.