Talking to Strangers: New York, NY

Nerve asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.

Patty, 28

What do you do?
I'm a yoga teacher.

Does it help you get laid?
Definitely. Everybody wants to fuck a flexible girl.

Have you used yoga moves in the bedroom?
Of course. Every time. Hip openers are the money. Your hip flexors, your hamstrings. Squats are really good. You've got to open up the whole area to let the energy flow.

Do you do yoga before sex as like, a regular practice?
I kind of do yoga all the time. I stretch all the time. I'm a little bit neurotic about it. But... if I know that it's going to be a special night, I might do some special stretches.

Are you close with your exes?
Not with my first, but I'm extremely close with my second.

Oh yeah? Like, last night kinda close?
[Laughs] Like four hours ago.

That's pretty close! Do you have any dealbreakers when it comes to dating?
I used to. But I keep breaking my dealbreakers. Like, drug use.

Do you have any crazy places that you've hooked up?
Car in Vegas. Fire escape in New York. Everything else is sort of normal... showers, you know.

What's the craziest thing you ever did to get a guy?
Well, there was an actor who was performing in a show that some of my friends were in, and he was very attractive. So after the show, I walked up to him and said, "Do you want to make out?" And his response was to kiss me. Then later there was a text. And we hung out.

And got to know each other?
Well, in a way. I mean, there was no talking.

 

Greg, 25

What do you do?
I'm a therapist.

Have you ever done anything inappropriate with a patient?
No. Absolutely not.

Do you have any interesting hook up stories?
Yes! I got a BJ — a blowjob — fellatio — a female performed fellatio... on my phallus... in a construction site... last weekend.

Thank you for being specific!
In the cockpit of a bulldozer. On North 11th St., between Driggs and Roebling.

Yes. We need the exact address, in case anyone wants to find the construction site. Did you break in?
It was open! There was no door. We just walked in and I sat down. We made out for awhile.

Were you like, "Step into the cockpit of my bulldozer?"
No. It was her. She was very forward. She suggested I take her into the construction site. I was like, let's go into the bulldozer.

Do you intend to see this woman again?
Never.

How did you meet her?
At a bar. Forty-five minutes earlier.

So you met a girl in a bar, you took her home...
I did not take her home! I didn't want to take her home. I still don't. And that's why we went to the bulldozer.

What's the difference between a girl who you take home and a girl who you take to a construction site?
The difference is date-ability. This girl, I knew from the beginning that I didn't want to date her. I didn't even want to hook up with her, but she was very persuasive.

So there are categories? Girls who you'd take home and girls who you'd take to a construction site? Is there a third category?
Yeah, girls I wouldn't take home or date. Then there are girls I'd marry on the spot. Like Shakira or Scarlett Johansson.

I've heard ScarJo is a terrible dancer. Just so you know...
I'm a terrible dancer.

So you're meant to be together.
You should tell her that! We're meant to be together.

 

Kaitlyn, 24

Are you from New York originally?
I'm from the Midwest — Minnesota.

Is dating easier here or there?
I don't really have that much experience dating because I just got out of a three-year relationship. But I think dating is definitely more exciting in New York. There are more people, and where I'm from it's sort of all the same type of person. You can exhaust your options pretty quickly.

Do Midwestern boys treat girls better?
I'm definitely less intimidated by Midwestern boys. I feel more comfortable around them. Everybody loves to tell me how terrible dating is in New York City and how shallow everyone is.

Do you think that's true?
I don't know yet, but I guess I'm going to find out.

What's the worst date you've ever been on?
Well, I've never been on a super awkward date. A guy has never taken me out to dinner. Well, a guy that I barely know... no. No one's ever been like, let's go on a date.  But I've had a lot of terrible dates with my ex-boyfriend where we just fought and I cried.

So no one besides your ex-boyfriend has ever taken you out to dinner?
Well, boyfriends have. But no strangers.

It's hilariously awkward. You should try it sometime.
I'm terrified.

What's the most unusual place you've ever had sex?
This is going to sound so slutty, but, in the boys' locker room in high school.

How did you make sure that no one came in?
Someone did come in, and I got in trouble.

Was it during school hours?
During lunch.

Why did you —
Because I was stupid!

Were there other people in there?
There was one other guy. He was tying his shoes and he kind of looked at us weird.

Well, yeah! I mean, were you naked?
My pants were down.

Do you have any dating dealbreakers?
The biggest dealbreaker for me is if our tastes aren't compatible. If we're listening to my music and he doesn't like it, it kind of ruins everything. It's like, why are we even doing this if we don't like listening to this record together?

Is there a particular band that, if a guy were into them, it definitely would not work out?
The Red Hot Chili Peppers.

What about "Under the Bridge?"
That is an okay song. But that is the only song. Anthony Kiedis' voice... ahhh. I hate everything he says. The other thing is if you go over to a guy's house and he just wants to play you his music all night long. And keeps talking about when he was on tour.

Do you think that there's one person for everyone?
No. My parents would probably like me to believe that there is. It's a Christian thing. You're supposed to only have sex with one person unless your spouse dies or something and you get remarried.

Do your parents know about the locker room?
Um... yeah.

Did you have to have the "save yourself" conversation in response to the locker-room incident?
It's been an ongoing conversation for my whole life, which is probably why I was having sex in the locker room.