Evan, 19

Do you live in New York?
Yes, I have for about eight months. I'm from Jersey.

What brought you here? 
Um... well, I have a really big story. My father kicked me out when I was seventeen, and I'm living in a shelter and trying to get my life together. It's a shelter for LGBT youth, ages eighteen to twenty-four. I'm going to school for nursing, and I have a job.

Why did your father kick you out?
He kicked me out when I told him I was gay. He said, "You're a monster," and "Being gay is not an option." I told him "Dad, look — I didn't choose to be gay," and he just didn't really care. He stopped supporting me, he stopped... loving me. He went to my school and told them that he didn't want me anymore, so the school had to figure out where to put me. And this was my adoptive father, who adopted me at nine months — my gay adoptive father, and his gay partner of fifteen years.

Wait. Your father was gay... but kicked you out for being gay? Did he keep his sexuality a secret from you?
No. He took me to a gay-pride parade and things like that. But when I came out to him, he printed out articles about people getting killed for being gay.

Did you ask why he was allowed to be gay and you weren't?
Yeah, I did, and I got slapped. He's bipolar and he has a drinking problem, so his reactions to things aren't very appropriate. My father was very abusive. But he told everyone that he was very supportive of me being gay. He'd say one thing and do another.

Are you dating anyone right now?
Yes. I have a boyfriend.

How'd you meet him?
Grindr? It's a gay app on the iPhone.

How long have you been together?
Six months. He understood my situation, which a lot of people really don't get. Once I tell them that I live in a shelter, it's like, "Goodbye." They make assumptions. I don't look like I'm homeless, I don't act like I'm homeless, I don't beg for money — I just do what I have to do.

Are you in a monogamous relationship?
Yes, we are. He doesn't want me to see anyone else.

How old is he?
He's twenty-eight.

Has your age difference affected the relationship?
When it comes down to it, my boyfriend likes to laugh like a big kid, so I feel like age is just a number. It's how you act and how you view life that counts.

Shotime, 27

What's your relationship status?
Dating. I've been in a relationship for four years.

How did you two meet?
On the train. It was mutual eye contact for about two minutes; I think I made the first move.

What was the first thing you noticed about her?
She had a pure look to her. Like innocence. I was intrigued by it, so I engaged in a conversation.

Did you normally like innocent-looking girls before then?
No. There was just something different about her, it was really unique. Breathtaking. So I had to talk to her.

Tell me about people you dated before her.
I mean, I'm not really a picky person; I like all women. Black, white, Chinese, Japanese, Lebanese.

Do you have any dealbreakers or turn-offs, then?
Yeah, kids. I can't deal with any baggage, or anything like that. I don't want to deal with it. I don't want to be a stepfather.

What are some strong signs of confidence in a woman?
Sometimes less is more. Like for big-breasted women, if she wears something that has her breasts out and cleavage showing, that just says, "I'm dying for attention — somebody come and get me." But somebody who has big breasts and covers it up, it just shows less is more — she's not dying for attention, you know? "If I get it, I get it; If I don't, I don't." She still wants attention, but she's not thirsting for it.

Working out here in such a high-traffic area, what are some funny things you've seen men and women do for each others' attention?
Um... one time this lady came out here, and she didn't know this guy from Adam, and like, five or ten minutes into the conversation, we all see her vagina. She was letting the guy play with her vagina, on 48th Street, midday Saturday, in the summer. That was the wildest shit I've ever seen.

Does your girlfriend get a lot of attention when you're out together?
Yeah, she gets a lot of attention. She's an attractive woman.

Does it ever make you jealous?
Nah, not really, because... me and my girlfriend, we kind of... We have threesomes. So it really doesn't matter.

Would she consider herself bisexual?
She likes to play, she likes to play. She wouldn't have a relationship with a woman, no, but she'll play with her.

Does she have a problem, watching you touch another woman?
Oh, no. It's kind of an aphrodisiac for her.

Do you bring in a friend of hers, usually? Or do you go out and pick someone up?
We haven't done it in a long time. But if we wanted to do it, we'd probably just pick somebody up. If she had to ask one of her friends, that would probably make the friendship awkward. It's more comfortable with someone who we just met.

If you both like the woman, do you try to see her again? Or is it a one-time thing?
It's usually a one-time thing. It could be more times, but that comes with emotional attachment and that's what we try to avoid, because we don't want anything coming in between our relationship. That just causes confusion.

It sounds like you're in love.
Yes. I am.

Charles, 46

Do you always walk around with your cat on your head?
Every day! Except for when it's raining out.

There are always the indoor malls... 
No, I really don't go inside. That would annoy security.

What do you do for a living?
Well, I'm going back to being a taxi driver.

Have you been unemployed?
Yes, for a long time. I'm in between jobs. That's why I do this, with the cat on my head. People take pictures, and some people pay me, some people don't. Some people are rude, some people are not.

What's the highest you've ever been paid, doing this?
I've had people give me $100 bills several times.

Wow. Do you meet ladies this way?
Constantly. Yes. Even though I'm married. It's not like I'm looking for a girlfriend, or to "hook up" — that's totally not my motive, you know. It's all about surviving right now.

How does your wife feel? Does she know about all that female attention?
Yeah. She comes out with me, and people take pictures, and I've got girls on my arms, and she laughs at it, you know? I've been with her twenty-four years now, so... I love her very much.

How did you meet?
We've known each other since we were kids. We went to grade school together, and then I lost touch with her for about ten years until I was in my early twenties.

What was your dating situation like, through those ten years?
It was a little chaotic. I was never really the type of guy who would go out and hunt down girls. That's not my motive. Love will come to you. I'm more interested in cars and bikes and that sort of thing, so that's where I focused. I rode a Harley Davidson to school.

Does your wife have similar interests?
Yeah, yeah. We've calmed down as we've gotten a little older. But my wife loves to talk, and she has a lot of friends. And we moved back to the neighborhood where we grew up, so we bump into a lot of friends who we've known for the past thirty years or so. I've entertained the idea of going out west, because it's cheaper. Even in Pennsylvania. I was going to get my truck-driver's license, but it's just not really working out in my favor. I'm just going to go back to driving a cab.

What are some crazy things you've witnessed in your cab?
I've had people smoke crack in the car. I've had drunk women taking their clothes off in the car. Once or twice, girls would grope me and start kissing me and that sort of thing, but I never followed through because you can get in big trouble for that. You know, wisdom comes with age.

What words of relationship advice would you offer to women?
Don't ever jump into bed on the first, second, or third date. I would say wait four to six weeks, at least. Definitely get to know a person. Getting into bed early is really not a good thing for either person, in my opinion. I would have to be an idiot to ever leave my wife, but even in that case, I would be looking for love, because I really can't tolerate much bullshit. One thing I live by is "If you act like an asshole, expect to be treated like one," you know? You get more flies with honey than you do with vinegar, don't you?

Want to talk to strangers in your town? Email submissions@nerve.comInterested in meeting an attractive stranger for a different kind of interview? Check out Nerve Dating.

Commentarium (34 Comments)

Feb 16 12 - 2:04am
jdoe

wow, the 2nd page of interviews was really unexpected

Feb 17 12 - 12:02pm
bl

i know, that was a great set.

Feb 16 12 - 3:11am
BOO

Awww..... Evan, my heart breaks for you. I wish you the best.

Agree with above commenter, the second page was unexpected.

Feb 16 12 - 3:51am
Ryan

Shotime seems like a bro I could get along with

Feb 16 12 - 7:26am
HEY

I've totally seen that guy with the cat on his head walking around NYC...

Feb 16 12 - 11:03am
Saratoga Slim

Shotime is dead-on about "less is more." Seems like cool person.

Feb 16 12 - 11:40am
MaryP

Very interesting set. Wow, Ryan, a late bloomer in 10th Grade???

Feb 16 12 - 1:11pm
Joe

HOLY SHIT CAT GUY!

I work a couple blocks from union square and I would see him from time to time. He's like Frank Chu, the sign guy from back home in SF.

Bravo, sir.

Feb 16 12 - 1:48pm
Teddy

Ryan and Evan are adorable! ... Worldly and self-assured for their age, too. Sloane looks so 'Classic New York'.

Feb 16 12 - 8:35pm
LT

I'm not sure where you live but I Sloane is hardly "classic New york."

Feb 16 12 - 8:37pm
LT

Minus the "I."

Feb 16 12 - 1:53pm
Laura

I can only hope to one day be able to ask the interview question "Do you always walk around with your cat on your head?"

Feb 17 12 - 5:01pm
mp

I can only hope to be asked that question

Feb 16 12 - 2:55pm
aha

evan is full of shit, sloane ughhh...the other guys were pretty cool

Feb 16 12 - 8:40pm
LT

Agreed. Maybe Evan is telling the truth but it sounds highly unlikely from what he said. I sincerely hope that he doesn't really have an openly gay father with a partner of 15 years that must have also helped raise him. This just seems so wildly unlikely.

Feb 17 12 - 9:47am
Teddy

Yes...Evan's story may appear top have warped logic, but far stranger things in life have happened. Human behavior is often warped,unruly, and highly contradictory. Factoring in his father's alcoholism and bipolar disorder makes the whole thing even that more likely. It's also quite possible that Evan's father felt guilty and responsible for the way his own homosexuality may have influenced his son's, that guilt manifesting and redirecting itself in the form of anger and spite. Uh...hello people?

Feb 17 12 - 9:57am
Teddy

*to* not top....And I don't think Sloane is pretentious. She was just professionally and respectfully representing the company she works for, and you probably would have done the same. And people can seem pretentious, when all they want is to be taken seriously.

Feb 17 12 - 3:27pm
LT

I agree about Sloane, to me she just seemed young, which she is, and which we've all been, no need to criticize her so harshly.

And though I'm still incredulous about Evan's story, you very well could be right, Teddy. People are often "stranger than fiction" and even the most outrageous claims can sometimes be true.

It doesn't quite ring as true to me still but that doesn't mean it isn't. And of it is in fact true, Evan is doing an amazing job at owning his own life and moving forward in some pretty horrible circumstance and is to be congratulated for that.

Feb 16 12 - 4:07pm
G Unit

I have to laugh at Sloane's reason for bashing Austin TX then saying what her "job" is.

Feb 16 12 - 8:30pm
OMG!

+1. You're a salesman. Get over yourself.

Feb 16 12 - 9:23pm
JO

I laughed heartily.

Feb 16 12 - 4:14pm
Windy City Steve

Wow, great interviews! Second page was a riot to read . . . I saw the cat guy once visiting NYC.

Feb 16 12 - 7:46pm
Els

Yeah, the second page rocked. This is an exemplary second page. Especially the cat guy.

Feb 16 12 - 8:12pm
leedeq encouraging

"I'm an image consultant. We identify excellence. We find beautiful people, and we market them to the appropriate salons that we work with. "

What a pretentious pile of crap.

Feb 16 12 - 10:37pm
lezley

+1

I do not understand how a human being with a soul could say that and not want to strangle themselves.

Feb 16 12 - 8:35pm
Deck

Love Murielle. Great perspective and honesty

Feb 16 12 - 8:41pm
LT

Yes, me too. Go Murielle! And she's gorgeous, too.

Feb 16 12 - 8:38pm
mmm

Can we get a different city than New York please? The one from Ghana was fascinating.

Feb 16 12 - 11:59pm
Lynn Chaloupka

I like the anonymity and the search for a universal subject or NOT when I talk to strangers ...esp. on a plane with a short air time! or if something funny happens on the El or train!

Feb 17 12 - 12:26pm
moop

The cat is thinking "why are you talking to my tranportation? I am the attraction here!"

Feb 20 12 - 10:46am
Gracias!

I like Sloane's sandwich/condom parallel...that was pretty cool.

Feb 20 12 - 11:38am
DR

I thought Sloane was a made up name when watching Entourage :S

Feb 20 12 - 10:05pm
SA

Less likely than Shotime?

Feb 20 12 - 1:15pm
JL

It's amazing the different perspectives people can have in similar situations. Dating is bizarre and expensive just like it was stated in the interview.