Maria, 25

Where are you from?
I'm from Rudozem, a city in the Rhodope mountains, but I've lived in Plovdiv for six years.

Is there a difference between the men in Plovdiv and the men in your hometown?
I think there is. All the girls from my school there are already married with kids. They're more family-oriented. Only me and one other girl are not.

Are there any bars in Rudozem? Places for the young people to hang out?
There are one or two chalga places that totally suck. That's it. There aren't a lot of things to do there. There are almost no jobs for young people.

So what are you doing in Plovdiv?
I study chemistry and food microbiology.

You mentioned you play the gaida.
That's right. I've played it since tenth grade. I started in Rudozem very spontaneously. I played a lot on stage too, all over Bulgaria and in other countries.

Do guys hit on you when they see you playing?
All the time. There are these bagpipes contests in the Rhodope mountains every year, and the guys get really drunk, so they bother me sometimes.

Do you have a boyfriend now?
No. I broke up with my last boyfriend a year and a half ago. We were together only two weeks, though.

So you're not really into relationships, huh?
No, not at all. I think I'm kind of unserious and too demanding. I'm looking at the guys around and I'm just not interested.

So are you interested in women?
No, even though sometimes I think that with another woman things would be easier. But I have one lesbian friend from high school, and when she starts complaining, I think that maybe it's even more complicated. I don't know; I've never tried it.

I'm sure a lot of guys hit on you. What do you tell them?
I usually just listen to them and wait for them to sink into their own words. There are men I like, but they're too scared to make the first step, because they think that nothing will ever happen. The other type are guys who are very cocky. They come to me very confident and keep saying how great they are, but I find this very repellent. A lot of them say that I have pretty lips. I've heard a lot of things — like "you have a very pretty head," which is kind of weird.

What's the longest you've been in a relationship?
Three months. That was when I was twenty, here in Plovdiv. It was all good, until he started thinking that I'd cheated on him with his best friend and roommate. It was totally pointless jealousy — the friend was living in one room with his girlfriend of six years and they were together all the time. But he didn't stop being suspicious and it was too much, so I broke up with him.

Do you have one-night stands?
No. I've had them before, but I think I outgrew them. If there's a guy I like only physically, we can go out and have a drink, then have a stupid conversation, and then sex and never see each other again. I don't see any point in that. And if it was supposed to be a one-night stand and they start calling me all the time... it's just not worth it.

Do you think that when you lose interest in some guy, he starts being more interested in you?
Yeah. There's this sentence I have written on my door. It says, "When you lose something and forget about it, it becomes yours." I think that's very accurate, especially in terms of love. When you stop caring about some guy, he starts calling you.

Have you ever asked out a man?
Yes, but I try not to bother. I just ask how he's doing, because I've been thinking about him. Some guys feel bad when you don't call them. There should be balance in everything. But I think the man should be a man — he should lead the relationship overtly, while the woman should lead it "underneath." The man should make a lot of the decisions. I'm sorry that I have to say this, but most of the men here are pussies. Cowards.

What are they afraid of?
They're afraid to say what they feel, what they think. They're afraid about their friends, about the women they like, about themselves, about their parents. They try to escape all responsibilities. They want everything to go easy and smooth. The women shouldn't want anything particular from them. There shouldn't be any worrying, no problems at all. They just want to drink and have fun, to lead the life they had as single men, but to have more sex. That's what Bulgarian men generally want from a relationship.

So what's your impression of foreign men here?
Once I met two Belgian guys here in Plovdiv. They were really cute — big gentlemen with very interesting lifestyles and ways of thinking. They seemed to me very balanced and tranquil. We went out two nights just as friends and then they left, but I got a text from them inviting me to Belgium for New Year's. I don't know, I just found them much more emotionally stable. But they told me they noticed that most of the women in Bulgaria were afraid to talk to them. The girls here acted as if they have to choose whether they just should talk to these guys or sleep with them after, and these guys didn't come here for "sex tourism."

NEXT: "After a few sentences, I understand if this woman is going to be cool if I start saying that I want to fuck her."