Talking to Strangers: Seattle, WA
Nerve asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.
BY Marguerite Kennedy
Are you in a relationship?
I'm kind-of dating about six different women right now.
Do these ladies know about each other?
Yes. It's all out in the open. No secrets, no lies.
And they don't mind being one of six?
There's no double standard, if you get what I mean. They're allowed to do the same thing. It's very equal-opportunity.
What do you do for work?
I was in the Marines, and then I was in Asia for a while studying martial arts. But now I'm... let's just say I can't talk about it.
Are you, in fact, Batman?
If I told you all my secrets, it would make your head explode.
When it comes to women, do you have a "type?"
I like spicy Latinas and Mexican girls. Latinas like me — maybe because I look a little bit Mexican, even though I'm half-Vietnamese and half-German. Oh, and I also like butch lesbians.
If they're lesbians, aren't they, um... not into men?
You'd think so, but I have special powers. Lesbians love me.
Okay, I'll bite. What's your secret for attracting spicy Latinas and/or lesbians by the half-dozen?
In Vietnam, you break the ice by smiling at someone. But there's a trick to it. You smile and make eye contact in a certain way. Also, I do this one wave, it's called the harmony wave. Like this. [He demonstrates.] I did it to you earlier — that's why you came over here.
Is that, like, some sort of Jedi Mind Trick?
It's a Vietnamese thing. Like I said, I've studied martial arts in Asia. There's a lot of mind control involved, and it carries over to social situations as well. Also, Under Armour underwear. [He shows underwear band.] It's a great way to get butch lesbians to go out with you, because they also wear this brand.
So, boxer briefs and eye contact. Those are the keys to a woman's heart?
And you have to listen. Girls don't really give a shit what you say, as long as you listen to them.
What's the quality you value most in a woman?
I don't think there's one thing that's important. I love all bitches. I'm DJ Isaac at the moment.
Like the song goes, "I love all bitches. Every homey's a king... every bitch is a queen."
NEXT: "He looked at me and said, 'Marvel, or DC?'"