Love & Sex

The 10 Best Things We Learned About Being a Stripper

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"He made me read bible verses as I danced…"

Last night a stripper of five years and a regular poster to Reddit's Gonewild — the forum's nude pic exchange —  held an AMA. The commenters probed her with some deeply personal questions about her line of work, and true to Reddit form, she fired back with candid, outrageous, and even tender responses. Covering everything from her lack of friends to the her dedicated use of butt rags, here are suckingoffsatan's (yes, that's her real username) most telling moments.

1. What's the best way to tell a stripper that you're not interested in her?

There's a polite and effective way of turning down a stripper's advances. "I'm okay for now. I'm gonna just relax alone, thanks," is a sure bet claims suckingoffsatan.

2. What's the most expensive thing a patron from a strip club has brought you?

A TV and a laptop. All she had to do was "ask nicely." Other things clients can do that are very nice is bring her food, bring her Crown Royal bags, and bring her candy.

3. What's the best way to tell if a stripper actually enjoys your company?

If a stripper actually enjoys talking to you and isn't just trying to "hustle you," "She'll always come back to you. After a stage set, you'll be the last person she thanks cause she'll want to sit down, thank you, and talk further. She'll leave her drink/bag/butt rag with you." For those not in the know: a butt rag is for "ass sweat, sitting on leather in undies gets sweaty and gross and it lets other bitches know that that's your seat and your customer," explains suckingoffsatan.

4. Is it just a myth that tons of guys come into the strip club and profess their love to dancers?

"Well, yeah, they say they love us. It's more like they're in love with the situation."

5. What gets you in the industry?

"I like attention. I like money. I like free shit," she puts it bluntly. She adds, "12-18 I was picked on and people here always called me names. So the attention, people telling you you're hot and what not all day is nice. Then getting paid and free booze for it is even better."

6. How much money do you actually make?

"Over 200 a night," she claims. And that's for about 8 hours of work. It varies, but it averages to about $25/hour.

7. Where do you want stripping to take you?

Suckingoffsatan isn't certain, but she admits, "I mean, it's stripping, where could it take me besides a gutter or a man's bed? I want to start documenting everything and submit it to VICE or write a book."

8. What's life really like outside of work?

"I have like no friends. Two girls I met dancing. We see each other at work and rarely go out. I usually go to dive bars around my house and sit alone. Or I'm on Reddit all night. I'm not happy." She adds, "I come home and and I'm usually drunk and want to eat or sleep or watch things online, no one really wants to do that with me. I don't trust the girls I work with."

9. How does it affect your dating life?

"Totally negative. No normal dude in their right mind wants to be with a girl who shows other men her tits. Also hard as fuck for me to get a job. People scratch their head and ask me why I'm 24 with no real job experience (I don't dare put stripping down.)

10. What's the weirdest request you've ever received while stripping?

"I've had tons. This guy used to come to the clubs around here with a fuzzy wooly itchy smells-like-a-retirement-home-filled-with-mash-potatoes-and-shitty-gravy sweater and makes you say bible verses. He highlights them like a creepy old person too. I did it cause it was hilarious and no girls wanted to do it. People told me I got a curse from it. I didn't."

[Reddit]

Image via Flickr.