Love & Sex

Roundup: No One Can Resist a Bearded Man

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Something about a beard that’s just so primal and feral that it just screams “jump my bones” without you even saying a word. A good beard can totally change your overall vibe and attract many a lady. But be warned, growing a beard is no easy feat; it’s not as easy as just not shaving. A lot of care must go into your beard. If you’re prone to crustaches and patchiness, you may not want to embark on this journey and just come to terms with your baby faced self. If you are ready to take the plunge into bearddom, read on.


[$6, Walgreens]

Step 1 is very simple: wash your face everyday! Don’t get lazy with it since it’s really easy to for acne to brew under that beard. This Neutrogena Grapefruit Scrub is invigorating and washes away dead skin cells. Plus grapefruit smells great.


[$32, Amazon]

Next up is maintenance. Before hoping in shower, give yourself a lil’ trim. Not all your facial hair grows at the same rate. If you don’t want your mustache to dominate while your sideburns are catching up, set this to a low setting, but one that’s just high enough not to trim the shortest hairs on your face. This will help even it all out. The Remington MB-200 has an easy to use wheel with 9 length settings and Lube for Life blades that never need oiling. picture-6

[$15, Amazon]

Once you’re done trimming, give your beard a fine tuning with Tweezerman’s Moustache Scissors and Comb. This will take care of all the strays that are hanging over your lip. Also, fine tune your beard with your regular shaving razor. I use a Gillette Mach 3 and it works great. Shave the upper cheeks and the neck. WARNING: Don’t shave along the jawline. This looks really bad. You want your beard to look natural, but maintained. Best practice for shaving the neck area is to shave straight across the neck. When you look in the mirror you shouldn’t be able to see the hair on your neck but you should still have an underbeard. When trimming a beard, I do it before the shower since it’s not as important to reallly open up those pores as it is when shaving completely.


[$20 for both, Beard Care Products]

You want that beard to be soft and clean, not rough and dirty. You want your lover to stroke it and be able to make out with you without totally ripping apart her chin. Beardlsey’s Ultra Beard Shampoo has cocamide dea, “a natural oil expressed from coconut kernels used for its cleansing and foaming action” and quillaia extract, “botanical bark extract known to promote healing and reduce excessive skin oiliness” (which will also help fight breakouts). Then throw in a little bit of Beardsley’s Ultra Beard Conditioner containing extracts of wild cherry, golden seal, and marigold to keep it smooth.


[$17, Beard Care Products]

Once you’re done with your shower, pat dry with a towel, and apply a lil’ Professor Edward Fuzzworthy’s Gentleman’s Organic Beard Care Gloss. Just take a small dab and work it into your beard until warm. This will leave the beard soft and glossy for the rest of the day. When done just stroke your hairs downward with your finger or a comb and you’re ready to show the world your well-maintened, soft, sexy beard!